Ask HN: What should I do if I feel depressed in my job?

1) Exercise for at least 60 minutes/day. I recommend getting a pedometer and walking 12,000 steps/day, plus working out with weights 2-4 times/week 2) Gratitude -- try to spend time every day thinking about the things you are grateful for 3) Meditation -- 10 minutes/day. It works. Studies prove it! 4) Relationship with the sun -- try to get outside at noon every day 5) Eat an anti inflammatory diet. Inflammation is heavily correlated with depression. 6) Try to do something nice for at least one person every day. 7) Research sleep quality and follow all the best practices. 8) Take a Vitamin D supplement, just in case :)

If you do all those things, you'll probably find yourself a lot happier at your job!

the main idea is, do not tie your identity or sense of self-worth to your job. be very clear that your job is what you do to get enough money to support your "real" life, and concentrate on making the rest of your time enjoyable. the side project is a good start, but also exercise more, take up some non-tech-related hobby (maybe one you can share with your wife), take short courses in random, interesting skills (e.g. cooking), develop an active community of friends (host dinners, board game nights, regular "check out a new restaurant" outings, walking tours of interesting neighbourhoods, etc.)

that takes care of the life side. as for your career, you might be stuck in a rut right now due to visa restrictions, but that won't always be the case. when it isn't, will you be prepared to interview for a better job? if you don't feel so, then why not? and if you can identify the reasons you might fall short, it's well worth putting in some time building up your skill set, so that as soon as you are able to move jobs, you are also prepared to do so.

First thing on the list might be a skills inventory - what would you like to be doing? Can you then start a small project to start learning or developing the skill?

A walk each day - rain, wind, sun or snow - is very important. Away from the office, you will get time to think about positive things, and how you work towards them.

I am sure you don't, but try not to portion any blame on the wife as she is not yet working. I am saying this as a witness to a friend who did the same when he felt trapped and alone in his work situation. One day, you may make a big pivot in life, and your wife will be working and supporting you whilst you do.

Selfish note - the company survived before you and will survive after you. Therefore do what work is required, but if you find yourself with free time then pick up things loosely related to your job, that give you a chance to learn new skills on their dime and their time.

If you are truly experiencing depression rather than a solid realisation that life in the big corps can suck royally, then you do need to find someone qualified to sit with you and address that specifically. But doing so should not stop the daily walks or the small step situation improvement plan.

Good luck.