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I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

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Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#101
post #88
post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I disagree. While sometimes you might not be willing to get into the good stuff, other times you're absolutely in that mood and get into it without breaking a sweat. I see nothing wrong in going with the flow most of the time. For the last while, I've been going at things at my own pace. I try, hard as possible, not to let myself get into anything I don't want to do. The result, I find, is that while I'm not as überp…

We've had a similar conversation before, but I think you confuse "hard work" with "uncomfortable, obsessive, frantic work."

Have we? My bad.

I guess I only start to think of work as work once I don't want to do it. Right now I'm messing with theme design, for instance, and if I'm lucky what I'm building will be used by hundreds if not thousands of people, but I'm doing it for fun so I'm not counting it as work. On the other hand, spending ten minutes to write a paper is excruciating labor.

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#102

Cary should have saved his time and just said "join the navy". I'm not advocating military service. But if this student doesn't want to stay where he is, doesn't know what he wants to do and doesn't have the means to relocate, it's probably the most stable situation to let him think about his/her own future. Just saying... 3 years on a boat or sub and he'll know EXACTLY what he wants to do (and will have a lot more m…

The disaster of that plan is you may very well figure it out 3 months in, and then have a multi-year effectively prison sentence to serve out. I have deep respect for those who do serve. I just don't think that recommending it as some kind of default "until you figure it out" is remotely a good idea.

Strongly disagree. Most of the services, especially if you're a "catch" for them will go a long way to let you explore your interests on behalf of the country, whether that's a PhD program in an area with national defense implications (most of them) or testing new equipment. A "prison sentence" gives a great disservice to those who are adrift and choose to serve.

(Needless to say, the financial/educational benefits due to the updated GI bill are also quite attractive)

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#103
post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. But obviously the quote's saying that if you're handed everything it means nothing. But if you lose it and have to fight to regain it, you learn its true value.

ah, like the prodigal son. (I used to wonder if "prodigal" was a biblical term; but it's just related to the word "prodigious". However, I don't know which came first.)

Well, it's a biblical reference. 'Roast the fatted calf when the prodigal son returns.' At least, that's what Ringo and Weber's "We Few" claims... ah, I love me my MilSciFic :)

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#104
post #60

I find that having a quality is inversely proportional to how often you talk about it.

I hate to be pedantic, but I think "negatively correlated" would be more correct. Even though people know what you mean, it gives the phrase less meaning in case you meant to use the technical definition.

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#105
It would seem to me this young man has already set the gears into motion by knowing he doesn't have the answers and by making an effort to question his life. Many of the responses in here speak so matter-of-fact-ly that one person's opinion is right or wrong, but the truth is, no one knows the secrets behind what makes for a good life.

Life happens and it's all about how to take it in. Be it thrusting yourself into hard, difficult situations or taking it easy to learn and enjoy the subtle nuances of life. There is a particular equifinality in life where the same solution can be derived through different approaches. No one here is in the right or the wrong.

My personal opinion is that "getting lost" is less the solution, but rather the gentleman should "stay open," if you will. Wandering is merely one action that tends to incur openness, but it may or may not be the correct approach for any one person in particular. Learning to appreciate life is what he's learning "the hard way" currently and I would venture to say he'll experience that 'click' in his head sooner than his doomsday-ridden mind is anticipating.

Realizing how fortunate we all are to be here in this cultivated "world" of intellectualism--of the attitude we all have developed through our own stories similar to this boy's--discussing the merits of self-realization (who I am) the requisites of self-actualization (what I can do) is what is important here. It's quite the privilege.

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#106
There's no such thing as being brilliant. You can do brilliant things. If you feel you have a talent that other people don't then pursue that talent. That's what 'brilliant' people do.

If all you have is good grades and no ambition, you're not brilliant, you're an idiot. Now start doing something about it.

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#107

my advice would have been: think harder

I wasn't being flip. His head is full of mush and delusions. He is unsatisfied with his academic success, girls, and hobbies because they do not cast him as some kind of mythic hero. He needs to get rid of that illusion. Throwing himself into the army or a startup company would just be feeding it. Once he stops doing things only to aggrandize his self-concept, he might find something he actually finds interesting or beautiful and from that will spring endless energy.

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#109
post #27

I honestly thought this was terrible advice. The problem this kid has is everyone has praised him seemingly since birth and so he thinks everything is simple. The mere fact that one teacher saying his dream was silly could throw his life into chaos shows he's underprepared for the world. In fact, the only reason he seems to feel lost is because he doesn't stick with anything beyond the initial thrill. Rather than nar…

Seriously? This kid unloads his complete existential disillusion, and your advice is "join a startup"? HN is starting to smell like Kool-Aid..

Re: I'm 20, brilliant and totally lost

#110

This kid's real problem is [insert projection here].

[if you think you're brilliant, you're probably not. The most brilliant people I know tend not to think of themselves in terms of brilliance.]

No, they're just smart enough to know that certain signals don't help them.
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