Ask HN: XMPP/Jabber self hosting

I'd like to host my own XMPP server for OTR communications. I've previously used OTR on top of Google Chat/Hangouts, but I would like to try managing the server myself.

Does anyone have experience with a modern XMPP server? I found a list of server software at http://xmpp.org/xmpp-software/servers/, however I'd like to hear some experiences before selecting one.

prosody has worked well for me, and is relatively easy to set up and configure.

I've been using Prosody for ~2 years on a couple servers and I can't recommend it highly enough: it's extremely simple, lightweight, and easy to configure. Its author is even on HN. https://prosody.im/

I don't recommend ejabberd, unless perhaps you need to cluster. It consumes a lot of memory, which is undesirable on a VPS, and once I managed to get an ejabberd server into such a weird state that it required dropping to its REPL and writing Erlang to fix it (fortunately I have a friend who knows Erlang)!

I run MongooseIM, an ejabberd fork. It works fine. It needed a reboot once, after that been running continuously.

I second this. ejabberd is good for your health. This message should not be construed as a replacement for professional medical advice.