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Depression and feeling like an outsider

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Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#11

Post by tormeh »

mlwarren wrote: post #5
_qjmt wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As somebody who has suffered from depression and anxiety, this is (mostly) fantastic advice. I waited so long to try an SSRI because so many insist that they don't work. Yet, when I got on 20 mg of citalopram, panic attacks disappeared leaving only occasional situational anxiety, and my major depressive episodes were reduced to just a little occasional sadness (though this is admittedly confounded with a half dozen o…

Seconded. SSRI's seem to have a stigma around them. A lot of people I know "worry it'll change their personality". For me, it did change my personality. I went from being an anxious mess to being functional. Really wish I had started them sooner.

I'm not on drugs, but I view the years before I went to a psychologist as 80% wasted.

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#12

Post by benaiah »

mindcrime wrote: post #6

Sorry to hear about your situation. If it helps, I can relate somewhat, as a founder who has struggled with depression at times. I wish I had some magic incantation to give you to help, but unfortunately I don't. I can say this though: 1. If you ever just need somebody to talk to, feel free to give me a shout. 2. Fish-oil is widely considered to be an effective over-the-counter / natural supplement that helps with de…

I'd be cautious recommending Nietzche to the depressed.

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#13

Post by _qjmt »

mlwarren wrote: post #5
_qjmt wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As somebody who has suffered from depression and anxiety, this is (mostly) fantastic advice. I waited so long to try an SSRI because so many insist that they don't work. Yet, when I got on 20 mg of citalopram, panic attacks disappeared leaving only occasional situational anxiety, and my major depressive episodes were reduced to just a little occasional sadness (though this is admittedly confounded with a half dozen o…

Seconded. SSRI's seem to have a stigma around them. A lot of people I know "worry it'll change their personality". For me, it did change my personality. I went from being an anxious mess to being functional. Really wish I had started them sooner.

Same here. My old personality mostly comprised avoidance of any behavior that had occurred near a panic attack, which slowly began to cover more and more of the things I once enjoyed. My new personality is dominated by intellectual curiosity. Definitely an upgrade, though it also saddens me how much better my life would be had I started sooner.

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#14

Post by applekor »

jokoon wrote: post #2

1. try an antidepressant, keep taking it without changing the dosage. try this for at last one year. 2. when you feel down and you're feeling worse and worse, try going out and walking for at least 15 or 45 min, or find something to do. breathe. don't stay in one place. don't let immobility and routine drown you. if you can do something that can make you move and make memories, you should do it. depression is a brain…

I wholeheartedly agree with 1 and 2, but I'm less enthusiastic about 3 and 4. I can't imagine that you meant it this way, but it can sometimes come across as "you have no valid reason to feel sad," which then makes some people feel badly about feeling badly, and the loop closes in on itself. At least that's where I find myself in trouble sometimes...

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#15

Post by goshx »

agumonkey wrote: post #3
jokoon wrote: post #2

1. try an antidepressant, keep taking it without changing the dosage. try this for at last one year. 2. when you feel down and you're feeling worse and worse, try going out and walking for at least 15 or 45 min, or find something to do. breathe. don't stay in one place. don't let immobility and routine drown you. if you can do something that can make you move and make memories, you should do it. depression is a brain…

Walking 45 minutes is a free medicine. Hills especially, by the time you reach the top, the euphoria may already be there, in sync with the view. Quite pretty. Forests aren't bad either.

My cardiologist once said that simply standing up for 30 minutes would do better than any SSRI. I didn't get it at first and ended up taking SSRI for almost a year due to panic attacks, until I managed to replace it with surf fishing. I'd wake up early, go to the beach, watch the sunrise and stay there for a few hours standing up...

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#16

Post by subdane »

jokoon wrote: post #2

1. try an antidepressant, keep taking it without changing the dosage. try this for at last one year. 2. when you feel down and you're feeling worse and worse, try going out and walking for at least 15 or 45 min, or find something to do. breathe. don't stay in one place. don't let immobility and routine drown you. if you can do something that can make you move and make memories, you should do it. depression is a brain…

This is good advice, but I think it's more helpful (and less dangerous) to share personal experience than give blanket advice. "These things worked for me," is more useful than "These things will work for you."

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#17

Post by jonalmeida »

First of all, you're just plain fucking awesome you don't know it yet. I feel like I've meet the exact same people who aren't welcoming to people who are new and learning. The solution is simple, leave and find a different set of people/meetup. I've gone for meetups that are plainly a bunch of people in suits looking to make money of someone else's idea, and I've never returned again. Be courteous and leave, because they aren't looking out for any else's interest except their own.

I just got back from a hackathon myself, and I was lucky enough to meet a majority of people that were just excited to met others and learn new things. Look for people similar to yourself in those situations and try to start with small amounts of positive "what if?" questions to yourself when you get questions like that OR teach yourself to plain ignore that memory of your interactions with those people - it's not worth your time caring about it.

Good luck and hope to hear more from you!

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#18

Post by mcguire »

mlwarren wrote: post #5
_qjmt wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As somebody who has suffered from depression and anxiety, this is (mostly) fantastic advice. I waited so long to try an SSRI because so many insist that they don't work. Yet, when I got on 20 mg of citalopram, panic attacks disappeared leaving only occasional situational anxiety, and my major depressive episodes were reduced to just a little occasional sadness (though this is admittedly confounded with a half dozen o…

Seconded. SSRI's seem to have a stigma around them. A lot of people I know "worry it'll change their personality". For me, it did change my personality. I went from being an anxious mess to being functional. Really wish I had started them sooner.

Thirded. One of the symptoms of depression for me is anger; if I miss a few days of paroxetine, my temper starts resurfacing. With it, it's possible to notice that I actually have a personality.

Re: Depression and feeling like an outsider

#19

Post by alexanderss »

crazypyro wrote: post #8

As someone around the same age, this problem of depression seems to have affected almost everyone I know our age at some point. It is normal to feel depressed and down, especially at this age. I don't claim to have any answers, but as my best friend is going through a similar depression episode at the very moment, the article stuck a chord with me. My only advice is just to remember your situation can be changed in a…

Yes, you're right. Depression is more common than AIDS, cancer, and diabetes combined; and nearly 400,000 people attempt suicide in the US every single year. Those are only the cases medically documented. Depression and suicide are more prevalent in high socioeconomic environments and nations with higher quality of life. Depression is actually more likely to make you an insider than an outsider.

This author fixates on his local software developer and entrepreneur peers (depression can make it difficult to perceive interpersonal interactions objectively) but what he doesn't realize about them is that if you're lucky enough to be born in a country where you can pursue software and entrepreneurship as a teenager (especially in a world-class city full of opportunities like Boston where he lives now) you're MORE likely to be depressed or suicidal than the majority of the world's population who could only dream of having the life and access he has. They experience the same thing, and he is far from alone.

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