Don't be a jerk

#1

Post by ColinWright » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:08 PM UTC

Recently someone asked a question here on HN. I answered, and while it didn't take long, it did take a moment or two of my time. Freely given.

Then the question was deleted. No thanks, no acknowledgement, no reply. Just summarily deleted.

In the grander scheme of things it's small fry, but it irritated me. They probably don't care. After all, who am I to them? But still, it rankled a bit.

People - don't be a jerk. If you ask a question and someone answers, say thank you. They've taken the time, does it cost you too much to be polite?

Or am I just completely out of touch with reality?

Re: Don't be a jerk

#2

Post by JTon » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:13 PM UTC

I'm with you. Seems like it should be common courtesy to me.

Re: Don't be a jerk

#3

Post by forca » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:14 PM UTC

Indeed.

Re: Don't be a jerk

#4

Post by jgrahamc » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:17 PM UTC

I wrote about this a long time ago: http://blog.jgc.org/2010/10/power-of-gratitude.html

Re: Don't be a jerk

#5

Post by iancarroll » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:17 PM UTC

Wouldn't it make sense to prohibit deleting after x comments have been made?

Re: Don't be a jerk

#6

Post by bdcravens » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:18 PM UTC

I know I've had times when the answer/response made me look dumb, arrogant, etc, and I've been tempted to delete my comment. In those cases, it wouldn't have been the jerk thing to do, but the cowardly thing to do: if you say, own it, regardless of how it makes you look.

Re: Don't be a jerk

#7

Post by gadders » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:22 PM UTC

bdcravens wrote: post #6

I know I've had times when the answer/response made me look dumb, arrogant, etc, and I've been tempted to delete my comment. In those cases, it wouldn't have been the jerk thing to do, but the cowardly thing to do: if you say, own it, regardless of how it makes you look.

I saw a great quote about this once when someone posted something stupid and after being torn apart, was asked if he wanted his original post deleted and he said "Nah - stupid is supposed to hurt."

Re: Don't be a jerk

#8

Post by m0nty » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:22 PM UTC

I took the time to email someone about a specific problem and didn't hear back - how long does it take to hit reply and type "Thx"? The effects are corrosive: why should I bother to reply next time?

Re: Don't be a jerk

#9

Post by eau » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:23 PM UTC

S/he probably did not learn about common courtesy growing up. Society will give this person a lesson one day...

Re: Don't be a jerk

#10

Post by ColinCera » Thu, Aug 07, 2014, 3:24 PM UTC

Some people are jerks. Some people are too frazzled to remember good manners. Some people were raised by wolves and aren't even familiar with the concept of manners.

I don't expect people to say thank you when I answer a question. I used to, but that expectation was beaten out of me a long time ago. But I definitely appreciate it — it's a nice surprise — when someone does bother to say thank you, and I try to remember to always say thank you myself.