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The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

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Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#2
I find it hard to believe a "stand-up comic, writer and director from Astoria, NY" that "hangs out" in the night scene has not met friends that will sleep with him just for the sake of giving him some experience -- out of philo-love motivation, because having spent a fair bit of time in the area, there are quite a few people who would feel sleeping with a friend in this need is just the right thing to do.

Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#3

I find it hard to believe a "stand-up comic, writer and director from Astoria, NY" that "hangs out" in the night scene has not met friends that will sleep with him just for the sake of giving him some experience -- out of philo-love motivation, because having spent a fair bit of time in the area, there are quite a few people who would feel sleeping with a friend in this need is just the right thing to do.

TFA says he decided long ago that since he's waited this long, he can wait a little longer so that the first woman that sleeps with him cares for him. So I guess that excludes the well intentioned mercy fuck.

I see his logic, but I can't help but think that's a barrier, after all how will someone ever care for you if there's this gigantic barrier from the get go. I'm not female, but tbh I'd see as being as weird as finding out your date is some sort a member of a sec or a drooling fundamentalist.

Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#4

I find it hard to believe a "stand-up comic, writer and director from Astoria, NY" that "hangs out" in the night scene has not met friends that will sleep with him just for the sake of giving him some experience -- out of philo-love motivation, because having spent a fair bit of time in the area, there are quite a few people who would feel sleeping with a friend in this need is just the right thing to do.

TFA says he decided long ago that since he's waited this long, he can wait a little longer so that the first woman that sleeps with him cares for him. So I guess that excludes the well intentioned mercy fuck. I see his logic, but I can't help but think that's a barrier, after all how will someone ever care for you if there's this gigantic barrier from the get go. I'm not female, but tbh I'd see as being as weird as f…

As a woman who has dated only nerds, being a virgin is not a barrier/problem at all. It is sweet to be with a guy who hasn't just slept around. (Not totally dissing the guys who have, but it's just not everyone's type!)

Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#5
The thought occurred to me while reading this that there are probably lots of 33-year-old non-virgins who nevertheless have not had the caring relationship this man wants. I think the sex is irrelevant.

Although I'd have to advise this guy to just go get laid so it's not a sticking point in his relationships. And it's just fun. Go have fun with someone. It's sex, not a rocket launch.

Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#6
post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

TFA says he decided long ago that since he's waited this long, he can wait a little longer so that the first woman that sleeps with him cares for him. So I guess that excludes the well intentioned mercy fuck. I see his logic, but I can't help but think that's a barrier, after all how will someone ever care for you if there's this gigantic barrier from the get go. I'm not female, but tbh I'd see as being as weird as f…

As a woman who has dated only nerds, being a virgin is not a barrier/problem at all. It is sweet to be with a guy who hasn't just slept around. (Not totally dissing the guys who have, but it's just not everyone's type!)

But the barrier might not be on the females side, he's waited 33 years, how does he decide after 33 years that this time it is worth it.

Re: The 33-year-old virgin: Life without sex is only torturous if you let it be

#10
I think he should just get laid already. His idea of doing it with someone who cares is fraught, as there is a good chance he will get dumped and it will be crushing because of his circumstances, and because it wont mean as much to his first partner there will be a power imbalance in the relationship. He may also be so smitten that he ends up marrying the first one even if she isn't the right choice. Once in this marriage he will soon be regretting not having other experiences.
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