The Fight (2012)

My grandfather had a stroke in his late 70s. He was mowing another elderly lady's lawn (something he did for cash on the side given he was retired) and had a stroke. He fell down behind the mower and was down for 30 minutes before the lady noticed something odd about the fact that the lawnmower engine hadn't moved from one side of the house in that time.

He never fully recovered. He regained some mobility of the paralysed side, but never enough to walk despite our efforts to make him get up and use a rail to walk down the corridor. He could at least help my grandmother with his assisted transfers from bed to wheelchair, which was good considering she was almost as old as well. He was not able to talk properly, but he could communicate well enough. As someone who'd been tending to an avery of hundreds of birds and doing manual labour on his acres of property prior to that, it was the single worst torture for him to be paralysed like that.

He remained incredibly mentally sharp. He'd come to family birthdays and would be sitting at the end of the table with some of hte family around and he'd spot something across the room that no one else saw - a grandchild stealing a sweet from the table or whatnot. He'd struggle to communicate it to us but sure enough his eagle eyes and sharp attention had noticed it.

It was with no doubt that his incredible physical health was what made him even survive. He lived for some 5-8 years after that. It was a terrible life and he felt incredibly depressed and helpless given his previous circumstance, but he was alive and we gave him the best quality of life we could.

In summary, I guess what I'm trying to say via example is that you cannot possibly underestimate the ability for a healthy body to endure trauma that a less healthy body will just give up under. Especailly as you age, your physical health will help you in ways you can never imagine. Don't neglect it.

Oh, and CPR is a phenomenal tool. Being able to provide first aid is one of those things that you hope will never pay off, but when it does it will literally save a life.

I'm only 29, but to me it seems like getting older is about figuring out what you really value, refining your ideas and pursuing your desires. In other words, figuring out what matters to you.

Some people seem better at finding a clarity of purpose. Others change their minds, reevaluate their lives, shift their preferences and their focus. It's a process that I think a lot of people go through.

You'll go to college and learn about a bunch of different things. Maybe something will click and you'll say "this is what I want to do with the rest of my life," or maybe it'll take you a little while. Maybe you'll take a philosophy class and discover new and interesting ways of thinking about all of this.

I guess I'm just trying to say: don't worry if you don't know what you want to do with your time on this planet. You'll figure it out some day, or at the very least you'll have the search.

Edit: Just want to add that some people don't do anything with their lives and that's okay too. The phrase "do something with your life" bothers me a little just because it makes this assumption that life is this thing that you have to "do something" with (which I'm assuming refers to some kind of accomplishment). We're just sacks of meat experiencing and interacting with the world. Everything on top of that is personal values.

> I don't know what I'm doing with my life [ ... ] I'm a senior in high school

Spoiler alert: you will find this hilarious in a year or two.

Amazing story, and amazing writing!

By the way, the most spectacular story along these lines I've heard is that of Anna Bågenholm, a Swedish doctor who was trapped under ice, in flowing meltwater for 80 minutes [1]. She made a nearly full recovery after being "dead" for hours. Read the article, it makes you wonder what life really is.

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_B%C3%A5genholm

Changing your life to have different tendencies seems elusively tricky. My biggest one is the opposite of yours: stepping away from work.

Have you found ways around such obstacles?