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Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

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Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#31

Post by opendais »

trumbitta2 wrote: post #2

I'd go with a combination of 1/ and 2/. Most of us are like you. In 14 years I learned to: - low my expectancies - do my job always at 100%, but not 110% (save rare occasions) - live a life outside work (mine, btw, is a life of wife, side-projects, and mmorpg)

Yes, I'd also add to that...try to carve out a Service from the rest of the project that you can build -your way- without having to fight with anyone else. I know that does wonders for me.

I'm always amused when my Service is up and everything else is down. Then again, vice versa happens and I wonder what the fuck I was smoking when I wrote the part that failed...but hey, when you can only blame yourself it is amazing how much more fun you have at work. :)

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#32

Post by aculver »

You are none of the above.

If you've got a few years of development experience in companies like that, I recommend you "find a boss [you] respect" by becoming your own boss. Start with consulting. These engagements are different than employment because often times they're not full-time and you can stagger a couple of contracts together at the same time. This is to your advantage because you now have two "bosses" (clients) instead of one. I know it sounds counterintuitive that more bosses are better, but if things aren't going as you'd like on one contract, you can move on to another contract as it becomes available without the sort of risk you incur when you're switching full-time employment at one company to another.

From there, you can further increase your independence by building a product that has many smaller customers. Again, many "bosses", but you need each one individually much less, so you're actually more in control of your circumstances.

If it doesn't work out, you can be reasonably confident you can just fall back into regular full-time employment. In this scenario, your definition of failure is most people's definition of success.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#34

Post by antirez »

ronaldx wrote: post #27
antirez wrote: post #12

Maybe you are too tolerant? Usually you can say management is shit after a few weeks, don't wait too much before leaving and seeking a better company.

I think management style can change over time, especially in startups and even in individual managers. When a company has to face the reality of staying afloat, or when the pressure is on, management ideals and goals can quickly go out the window. I'd be curious to know what happened to the companies that parent quit.

That's true... to evaluate companies when the money flow is big is like to evaluate partners when you live in a different house.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#35

Post by eli_gottlieb »

It is just you, but it's not that you're crazy or incompetent or entitled. It's just that nothing ever feels as exciting after a year or two as it did at the start. You can't expect to realistically gauge your jobs on the basis of your novelty-excitement.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#36

Post by neutralino1 »

IgorPartola wrote: post #28

From what I've heard/seen most younger engineers have a half-life of 2 years. As in, after 2 years 50% of them will want to move on. This seems to be fairly normal and nothing terrible comes of this. There is also a very neat term I learned about a year ago: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_relationship_energy . I can see how it'd apply to this situation. I also found a dangerous situation that comes from commiserati…

Haha thank you for your reply.

I have tried freelance already and I didn't really like it. I would rather work in a team for a single company/project.

You are correct about talking to others. Yet, even if I have been fairly well treated, I do not want to work in a company where only so-called "high-value" employees such as developers are well treated. I do not support underpaid internship or crappy business developers deal. I know it's probably not my business caring about these things but I have a certain work ethic.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#37

Post by kevando »

aculver wrote: post #32

You are none of the above. If you've got a few years of development experience in companies like that, I recommend you "find a boss [you] respect" by becoming your own boss. Start with consulting. These engagements are different than employment because often times they're not full-time and you can stagger a couple of contracts together at the same time. This is to your advantage because you now have two "bosses" (cli…

This also helps you gain perspective. Once you work for yourself, you may hear yourself spitting bullshit, creating bogus plans, not closing deals, making short-sighted decisions, implementing poor management practices, pivoting too often, etc. Then you see the doors swings both ways.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#38

Post by edw519 »

I care more about the project than about the salary and benefits.

Great!

I suppose that's the case for most of us.

I don't suppose that. Others may say that, but they really prefer what's in it for them. You are in the minority. (That's a good thing.)

...the only thing I can see is the bullshit coming out of management's mouth...

That's the unmistakable signal from your inner self that it's time to move on.

Am I 1/ Bad at choosing my jobs

No. It's hard to choose the best jobs because, for the most part, they're already taken. Good bosses don't lose their people nearly as much so those jobs simply aren't as available.

2/ Too demanding towards the companies that hire me

No. Don't lower your standards.

3/ Mentally unstable

Maybe, but I can't tell from anything you've posted yere.

4/ Unrealistic

No. The day you lower your expectations to the mediocrity you've encountered is the day you've sold your soul and forfeited your real potential dreams.

5/ Just a normal bullshit intolerant guy

Probably.

Is there any way I can find a boss I respect beyond a couple of years?

Yes. You already have: yourself.

Tell me about your experiences.

35 years & 88 companies:

WorkingForSomeoneElse = WisdomAccumulation

DoingMyOwnThing = WisdomExpenditure // and much more fun!

I think that everyone needs a little of both. You've just had a little too much of the former and no enough of the latter. That's all.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#39

Post by neutralino1 »

pallandt wrote: post #22

The healthiest approach is to make time for side projects or other non-software related hobbies you may have. You're being unrealistic. Try lowering your expectations of other people and if you can't find complete fulfillment in your job, just search for it in something else. A job is just a job at the end of the day, you're primarily doing it for money. Not everyone is lucky to both have money and the ideal job at t…

Thank you for your comment.

You are probably correct but I find it a sad take on professional life. I hope I can prove you wrong :-)

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#40

Post by cleaver »

aculver wrote: post #32

You are none of the above. If you've got a few years of development experience in companies like that, I recommend you "find a boss [you] respect" by becoming your own boss. Start with consulting. These engagements are different than employment because often times they're not full-time and you can stagger a couple of contracts together at the same time. This is to your advantage because you now have two "bosses" (cli…

On the first day of my first consulting gig, as I was getting set up, an argument ensued over which server I should be doing my work on. In my old job I would have got caught up in the nonsense. This time I could just say: "OK, you guys figure it out, I'll just wait over here".

Sitting and reading while you count the dollars someone else is burning through can be rather therapeutic.

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