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Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

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Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#11
post #7

I'd go with a combination of 1/ and 2/. Most of us are like you. In 14 years I learned to: - low my expectancies - do my job always at 100%, but not 110% (save rare occasions) - live a life outside work (mine, btw, is a life of wife, side-projects, and mmorpg)

I think this is honestly good advice. Every employer will want you to live for your job, but for the vast majority of human beings this is not realistic. There's nothing wrong with doing a good job and then going and living a fulfilling life from 5pm to 9am.

I'm not really talking about long hours. I've always been happy doing my 45/50h a week. I don't complain about that. Rather about transparency, clear vision and accountability.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#14
post #8

We might be in the wrong culture. My friends in [anglo country X] say it's amazing over there. I think it's they have higher empathy and saner goals Over here, businessmen give you the "you can't make an omelette without breaking eggs" speech after they screw you. This was their real goal from day 1, it's just they have to sort of believe their lies to make you believe in them. Same old trick from con men and salesme…

But please don't get jaded. There are a lot of good people out there. They are the ones who are not trying to use you and are busy already. You have to go meet them. I'd say good people are the majority.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#15
Sounds like building your own business is up your alley. You may be all of them except 3. It could be that you see yourself as a much better manager and you probably are. Try something small that you hear there is a need for and you might be able to find more fulfillment from that than job hopping. Business isn't for everyone but you can give it a shot.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#16
As if giving 100% for a couple years isn't enough? Don't feel bad about poor leadership from the top. Most startups fail even with good people giving their best efforts. Move on if you have better options. Until then, just make sure the checks cash.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#17

I'd go with a combination of 1/ and 2/. Most of us are like you. In 14 years I learned to: - low my expectancies - do my job always at 100%, but not 110% (save rare occasions) - live a life outside work (mine, btw, is a life of wife, side-projects, and mmorpg)

Belatedly realizing the same points.

Most start-up work is 'hauling shit uphill' (horribly paraphrasing a quote about acting that Sean Connery said in his acceptance for some lifetime award).

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#18

Whether you're 1/2/3/4/5, you're not alone. My dad has worked at the same company since he dropped out of college around 40 years ago (he runs it now). I do think our generation's (well, I'm 32, don't know about you) job goals are a lot different and a lot more conducive to short-term jobs, and I don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with that. I tend to place maximum value on doing real work and self improv…

Thank you for your reply. I am 30 and indeed, we seem to have different work expectations than our fathers.

I am probably too easy to work with. I take care of loose ends, make it easy for people to achieve their goal, polish sharp corners for everything to run smoothly, treat everyone respectfully, etc... Everyone ends up thinking everything is natural and are surprised when I suddenly quit.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#19
Personally, it's always been about trying to separate my frustrations with the company I'm working for, and frustrations with work. No matter what job you have, it's still a job and there will be things that you are unhappy about. The thing you need to figure out is whether those frustrations would be resolved by switching companies, or if they are frustrations that come no matter where you work. Sometimes the grass is damn green on the other side, but when you move over the same problems follow you.

Re: Ask HN: Is it me or ...?

#20
It's you. It was me a while ago when I finally realized that I am only projecting my anxiety by not having solutions to problems out of my domain. In the past I used to tag business decisions "good" or "bad" on: 1. Tentative technical implementation issues when the decision hits the work floor 2. Conjecture about those business decisions based upon hearsay and blog posts. I have worked in about 4 startups(including the current one) Only when I attempted my own start-up(and miserably failed) did I realize the unreliability of taking such business decisions. For e.g: I have a new product in a virgin market. How should I price it"? One shot or iterate? Or Long sight or short sight? As programmers we expect our employers to empathize with our work, it's only fair that you show the same empathy back to your employers. Now instead of snickering and bitching about it, I try to calm my anxiety by putting myself in the shoes of the decision-taker. If I am still not satisfied, I attempt to resolve it by asking for an open discussion. More often than not I am able to empathize with the decision-taker. Taking the "Archer" way of doing things, i.e thinking about problems when they actually occur has certainly made me happier and more productive.
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