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I am burned out while still in learning phase

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Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#41

Post by moron4hire »

Some loved ones guilt-tripped me into taking sessions with a career coach about 2 years ago. They bought the sessions as my "Christmas present", despite them knowing I wasn't going to appreciate being told I was broken and needed someone to fix me.

I resolved I was going to be "the best damned career coach's student ever". I wanted to give them no possibility of blaming me for not working hard enough. I was going to "prove this shit doesn't work".

I was wrong. I was wrong about a lot of things. It literally turned my life around.

It was all self directed, with the coach being a sounding board and a target. It was easier to do things when it felt like coach was telling me to do it, even though they were all things I had determined and assigned to myself.

That was one of my problems. I would prioritize other people's issues before my own. "Go to the doctor for a wicked cough in the middle of a work day? Hell no! That's a personal problem! You do that on your own time!" If it were just me, I would have sloughed it off, creatively procrastinated it away, like I did all of my other life chores. I ultimately knew everything that was wrong with me, but I wouldn't do it because I had this one problem.

"One weird trick to fixing your life". I should write for BuzzFeed.

Burnout is a symptom of not taking care of yourself. It's not a symptom of overworking. If you're happy and working on something you love, you'll do it 120 hours a week, it'll always feel like play. But you'll still get burnt out because you're not nourishing yourself, sleeping enough, exercising, etc.

Message me if you want a recommendation for a great one. Email address in my profile description.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#42

Post by lnanek2 »

I'd vote with the doctors. Sleep a lot and eat well. All your physical symptoms just sound like stress and sleep deprivation. You can ask the doctors for some stress medication, although I find it makes me just stare out bus windows dully and not sit coding wildly the entire bus ride, for example, so it will hurt your productivity.

I don't think you should be so concerned about what other people think or what happens at hackathon and startup events. If you go to an event and code all weekend and are nice to everyone, you profited from the event even if you didn't win. There's always going to be luck involved and there's always going to be people better than you and worse than you. You can't judge yourself by event performance.

I feel for you wanting to do the whole startup thing and work on your own projects and quit school and whatnot. But honestly, I think you should just finish school, take an internship, and sock away some money and some experience first. Think of that first job or internship as someone paying you to learn technology that you will use to write your own stuff.

Maybe at first you'll just write one commit of your own stuff each night, but later on you can quit if you want to and you are more stable and ready. Don't quit to go learn stuff, though, that's a waste of time. You want to focus on doing stuff and just learn what you need to do what you want. Anyone can waste their whole life learning and reading blogs and not accomplishing something.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#43

Post by blauwbilgorgel »

You need a healthy schedule. Sleep deprivation is NOT a badge of honor: https://signalvnoise.com/posts/1006-sleep-deprivation-is-not...

Stop reading entreporn (blogs and forums celebrating the entrepreneurial lifestyle). It's an echo chamber. It gives you a warped view of success and what it takes to get there. Actionable content is remarkably thin. You are not learning from reading Techcrunch articles, you are procrastinating with the delusion of learning about business. It's entertainment.

Start meditating or exercising. You need something to take your mind of things or regain balance. Try 20 minute exercises.

And for the medical symptoms. Talk to a medical professional and listen. When they say: Sleep more and keep a healthy schedule, then do so.

Good luck and feel better soon!

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#44

Post by gutsy »

I'll reiterate what everyone here has said: you're not going to change the world right now, and putting yourself under that kind of pressure is bad for you. If you enjoy coding and building things, then find a company to work for where you can hone your skills and make decent money doing what you love. The best part of that is after your work day is done, so are you, you can then spend some time chilling and living your life. It's not sustainable to spend your entire waking day working and learning, you need to balance it or you'll lose it.

Being an entrepreneur isn't for everyone. There's no shame in admitting that it isn't for you. There's plenty of great work out there that doesn't require you putting it all on your shoulders.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#45

Post by kirklove »

blindhippo wrote: post #14

You're burning out because you're thinking the world works the same way that you experience it through lenses like Hacker News, tech blogs and the like. Stop reading them. Seriously, they are damaging your world view - ESPECIALLY HACKER NEWS. If you can't read these things with a critical eye, you will end up in a death spiral where you feel constantly inadaquate. I speak from some personal experience here... Turn of…

Fantastic comment. Wise in so many ways.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#46

Post by pawelkomarnicki »

Oh man, that's what I seen so many times among younger devs with "passion" — it easily gets derailed by overly high expectations of reality and the crash of this misconception and the reality as it is, where nobody really cares and each compliment whisper is followed by 3 discouraging shouts :(

I think young generation (well I'm actually one of you, being 28) needs to learn that work is not everything; We must learn that work is not the aim itself and saying "I'm a developer" does NOT define you anyhow. You just happen to be a developer, no matter how much you would like to identify with this symbol.

I was exactly like you at some point of my life. I considered dropping out of school (never did) and started (failed) my startup. And I learnt something. Identifying yourself through the work was killing me. I was a developer and I hated myself. My head hurt and my back was killing me for these hours spent on the chair. I felt like I am cheating myself when not working, everyone I knew almost left.

And then epiphany — I just happen to make websites and software. It's my way to earn money, I like doing that, but I'm not 100% developer. Over last few years I started thinking that maybe I'm not even 10% developer. I'm a cook, I'm a dog owner, I'm a movie fan and music person. Saying that I am anything is like saying "I'm finished". I'm not.

And you're not finished even though it feels like that. You're in your early 20', you're basically still a child. Embrace it. Being undefined is freedom.

Being you I would make a full stop. Rethink. Make a short break to win everything back — go back to school, do a fixer-uper with your close ones. If you loose them now you will never get them back.

Be brave and take a step back to make a leap forward, good luck mate! :)

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#47

Post by sillysaurus3 »

blindhippo wrote: post #14

You're burning out because you're thinking the world works the same way that you experience it through lenses like Hacker News, tech blogs and the like. Stop reading them. Seriously, they are damaging your world view - ESPECIALLY HACKER NEWS. If you can't read these things with a critical eye, you will end up in a death spiral where you feel constantly inadaquate. I speak from some personal experience here... Turn of…

You will not change the world with a web app. No one changes the world with a web app. Or an android app. Or an iPhone app.

There's no need to lie. The advice is otherwise good.

The world is vast and has many places that need smart people. Find those places, adapt to what they need and start solving problems in the way you can

The world is built to exploit smart people. I personally think they should focus on themselves and stop caring what other people want out of them, but I don't know whether that'd be best.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#48

Post by nichochar »

blindhippo wrote: post #14

You're burning out because you're thinking the world works the same way that you experience it through lenses like Hacker News, tech blogs and the like. Stop reading them. Seriously, they are damaging your world view - ESPECIALLY HACKER NEWS. If you can't read these things with a critical eye, you will end up in a death spiral where you feel constantly inadaquate. I speak from some personal experience here... Turn of…

100% yes. Being a hacker is a tool. It's a tricky one because you are not facing the real world, the world you're building for.

At the end of the day the objective of any life should be happiness, giving or obtaining it, ideally both. Always take a step back if you're not getting there.

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#49

Post by paborden »

Having gone through many burn-out and plateau periods, here's what I'd suggest:

- Get regular acupuncture. There's a reason it's first on my list. Yes, I realize it's hippy dippy. Yes, I realize it might not be proven. But regular acupuncture and chinese herbal medicine is life changing.

- Do something silly and out of the norm. Go lay on a beach for a week. Visit somewhere new. Forget your goals. Changing things up can give you a huge jump start.

- Cultivate the right habits. Oscillating between 45 minutes of work and 15 minute breaks can help. Meditation can help. Drinking enough water can help. Eliminate caffeine and soda. Use sunlamps and Vitamin D in the winter. Sleep with buckwheat pillows, earplugs, and blackout curtains.

- Get tested for Pernicious Anemia. This was a big one for me, because I'm of northern European / Scandinavian descent. Started supplementing with B12 and all my complaints of lethargy went away.

- Be OK burning out. You don't need to be push push pushing all the time. Sometimes what my body and psyche needs most is crappy TV and junk food (in moderation).

Re: I am burned out while still in learning phase

#50

Post by Dysiode »

benmarks wrote: post #21

The best news in this situation is that you are able to articulate it and that you have done so to your peers here and to your friends and family. You are far from having all hope being lost. Your symptoms sound very much like a combination of anxiety disorder and depression or dysthymia. I dealt with / deal with these things too. I'm 36 now and life is pretty interesting and good, but I remember being right where yo…

This is one of the most grounded and realistic responses at the moment, and I would like to add a bit from my experiences with anxiety and depression.

While my symptoms weren't as severe when I went to see a psychiatrist he stated future sessions would be less about therapy and more focused on how the medication was working. This may have been poor luck on my part but I instead found a PhD level Psychologist instead because their focus is on perspective and providing you with mental tools you can use over and over again.

That said, I'm not discouraging medication, simply ask your psychiatrist about how much therapy you can expect in addition to the medication, and considered also using a psychologist to help provide mental tools.

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