Also why is there a lack of African American people there?
Anyone ever been to a technology conference? I felt like I stepped into Harvard circa 1955.
Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
31–40 of 113 posts
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#32this is complete nonsense, SF is full of very beautiful women. After living here for many years, I'd respectfully disagree with this. The neighborhoods with the highest density (scientifically studied over a lifetime) are The Lower Haight and The Mission.
I lived in SF for years and think you're nuts. Completely nuts! The Lower Haight!?!?! The only explanation I have is that you've contracted the dating version of Stockholm Syndrome. Where are the beautiful women hanging out in the Lower Haight? Noc Noc? Peacock Lounge? What's your idea of beautiful? Janene Garafalo? The Lower Haight was the one neighborhood I could count on where I'd go into a bar and there would be…
I lived in SF for years and think you're nuts. Completely nuts! The Lower Haight!?!?! The only explanation I have is that you've contracted the dating version of Stockholm Syndrome. Where are the beautiful women hanging out in the Lower Haight? Noc Noc? Peacock Lounge? What's your idea of beautiful? Janene Garafalo?
I met my wife at the Noc Noc, and she doesn't look like Janene Garafalo (not that there's anything wrong with that), but your anecdotal mileage may, of course, vary.
The Lower Haight was the one neighborhood I could count on where I'd go into a bar and there would be literally no women. Even worse odds than the Castro or the tranny parts of the Tenderloin. Try it - go to Toronado any night of the week and count the number of women.
The Toronado is for beer. You go there to partake of their positively astoundingly amazing on-tap selection, not pick up women.
Anyway, the best place to meet women is Union Square during lunch hour during the week. The people there are generally employed, take reasonable care of themselves, and aren't trying to live out some lame grungy hipster fantasy life straight out of 1993...
I see -- you were just in the wrong city! If you wanted post-sorority "generally employed" women, you really shouldn't have moved to San Francisco. You certainly shouldn't have been surprised that this restricted your options to department store neighborhoods and office commuter destinations.
I'd suggest a location such as such as LA or Manhattan, which are probably more socially amenable to your cultural presumptions.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#33As a gay man in Boston, I'd be fascinated if someone revisited those numbers in a queer context: how do things change for bisexuals? Homosexuals? What's the effect of mixed genders in a bar? The common trend seems to just be packing more 21-35 year old men into a room, and I don't know how far that is from optimal.
You're asking what the gay scene is like in San Francisco?
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#34As someone who is considering moving to San Francisco, this is terrifying. Please, can a local soothe me with a rebuttal?
I think it's more that most men here aren't into the same sorts of things women are into, so they self-segregate by sex.
If you're going to work 70-80 hours on a startup, basically no sane woman is going to join you (I know a couple women that'll do startups, but most seem to want some semblance of a life too.) If you're going to read TechCrunch and Reddit and Digg all day, same thing.
If you go to a yoga/pilates/yogalates class, or a Harry Potter fan convention, it will be practically all women. And even big tech companies have pretty even gender ratios, at least out of my sample size of one. My cube is 3 women and 4 men; so was my last project. Back when I had roommates, it was 2 girls and me.
I think people find the Bay Area so dating-hostile because the people who move here are often hostile to dating. A lot of guys come to Silicon Valley to seek their fame and fortune with this wild-eyed technology vision, where they'll put their nose to the grindstone and concentrate on their code for 5 years. That's not a very good way to meet women; most of them don't exactly care for that lifestyle.
Then again, I've been here for 6 months and am still single. Then again again, I haven't exactly been looking very hard. I'm one of the dating hostile (well, apathetic) folks. ;-)
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#35I remember reading an article posted here awhile back about Zuckerberg and some other young guys being accosted in a bar by a transvestite. I thought, "Geez, only in SF can a straight potential billionaire not get an old-fashioned hetero lap dance."
Anecdotal, but I went for a few interviews in that place and it is definitely NOT the place to be for a single straight man in his 20s.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#36Earlier quoted context omitted.
I lived in SF for years and think you're nuts. Completely nuts! The Lower Haight!?!?! The only explanation I have is that you've contracted the dating version of Stockholm Syndrome. Where are the beautiful women hanging out in the Lower Haight? Noc Noc? Peacock Lounge? What's your idea of beautiful? Janene Garafalo? The Lower Haight was the one neighborhood I could count on where I'd go into a bar and there would be…
I lived in SF for years and think you're nuts. Completely nuts! The Lower Haight!?!?! The only explanation I have is that you've contracted the dating version of Stockholm Syndrome. Where are the beautiful women hanging out in the Lower Haight? Noc Noc? Peacock Lounge? What's your idea of beautiful? Janene Garafalo? I met my wife at the Noc Noc, and she doesn't look like Janene Garafalo (not that there's anything wro…
I agree. If your cultural presumptions lean toward beautiful, well-kempt women, LA or Manhattan (as well as any number of other cities) are infinitely better than SF.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#37The valley, specifically Palo Alto is not that bad at all. Actually it's damn good. It's a college town, and Stanford girls are quite good looking. The bar scene is nice at Old Pro, Blue Chalk, etc. Sadly, facebook employees often overtake a lot of the old pro.
If you're in the tech industry, then you probably spend most of your time out at "industry" events. There might occasionally be a couple of cute girls, but you're looking in the wrong place.
I can't speak for SF itself, since I always hung out in the Valley. Dress well, get in shape, and be charismatic, as you'll actually be able to stand out above the plethora of anti-social bufoons. You're also probably passionate about what you do, so make sure that comes across as women seem to respect that too out there.
This all comes from someone who now lives in Miami, where the women are supposed to be unbelievably attractive. They are, but i'll use the cliche and say looks aren't everything. Actually the women here are so dumb and pretentious that it's able to make supermodels become unattractive. The Valley has an awesome balance of looks and brains, so do not take that for granted.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#38That is spot on. Population-wise, SF men outnumber the women by something like 55%-45%. However, if you tried to estimate that number based on the nightlife scene, you'd arrive at something like 70%-30%. I think the psychological concept that the essay sites also explains the lack of girls in bars (which, for many guys, is a far more important stat than the population-wide one).
Strictly mathematically, it's not hard for a population split of 55-45 to result in a singles split of 70-30. Say that 35% of males and 35% of females are in a (heterosexual, monogamous) relationship. By definition, the numbers will be equally balanced, so of the remaining 30% of the population, 20% (of the total) are male and 10% are female, for a 66-33 split.
70% in couples seems high to me, so there's probably another effect at work. It's the same effect that makes it really hard to find a job in a recession: normally you might have 5% of the population out of work and 5% positions waiting to be filled, but if you suddenly have 10% out of work and 1% of positions open (companies that lay off people generally aren't hiring), instead of 1 person for each open job you have 10 people looking for each open job, even though 90% of the population weren't affected at all.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#39As someone who is considering moving to San Francisco, this is terrifying. Please, can a local soothe me with a rebuttal?
how could there be no women in SF? get ready for fun.
Re: Why There Are No Girls In San Francisco
#40this is complete nonsense, SF is full of very beautiful women. After living here for many years, I'd respectfully disagree with this. The neighborhoods with the highest density (scientifically studied over a lifetime) are The Lower Haight and The Mission.
Please specify which other cities you are comparing this to.
I would guess he is comparing to Mountain View or Sunnyvale.