I bellyfeel banning words is doubleplusgood.
Don't Ban “Bossy”
31–40 of 102 posts
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#32Bossy is extremely specific and a terrible style of leadership. I've known bossy women as well as women who were great leaders. The overlap has between the two is the empty set.
How about you teach real leadership skills to girls who like to lead? Such as understanding, empathy, reward, etc. Of course the same goes for men, and bossy men are just as big a problem.
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#33That's funny, I actually heard the word used when I was a military cadet in high school. It was used to teach the difference between being a a leader, or just, well bossy. Don't be a boss, don't act bossy, and so on. Bossy people, we were taught, boss people around by using their rank. No one wants to follow them, they just have to. That's the worst kind of leader, we were taught. don't be bossy was good feedback. A…
In Sandberg-style liberal feminism (which preserves inequality except for the more well-off white women and therefore doesn't help all women), I can imagine they want to improve subordination to female bosses. So you should be ready to follow her imperatives like you would Zuckerberg's. In corporations, boss subordination is so complete that "bossy" only applies to someone who isn't actually literally a boss. So I ca…
I found this critique along those lines interesting: http://www.dissentmagazine.org/online_articles/feminisms-tip...
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#34That's funny, I actually heard the word used when I was a military cadet in high school. It was used to teach the difference between being a a leader, or just, well bossy. Don't be a boss, don't act bossy, and so on. Bossy people, we were taught, boss people around by using their rank. No one wants to follow them, they just have to. That's the worst kind of leader, we were taught. don't be bossy was good feedback. A…
My general impression about being a boss is that "one should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself" does not apply for such situation. Like business should focus on customers, leadership style should focus on employees. Some boss set example according to their value and standard, employees might just not appreciate that.
For example, a military style boss might value be at work on time, get your timesheet input on time, etc. and does an good job keeping them in check. Most innovative people with ENTP (rational inventor) personality people, or simply creative people will not appreciate that a bit. Result is low employee retention regardless of benefits. Well... that's just an example.
This applies both to male and female bosses. Things I observe in ineffective leaders:
Female bosses automatically associate their ineffective leadership with their gender; Male bosses acts like higher ranked military personnel in an inappropriate setting (like growupkids mentioned); Bosses fail to reevaluate their leadership style based on the data (most productive people keep leaving, they are generally 'kind' enough not giving you the real reason); Bosses do not have actual authority (this happens a lot in Federal Government, bosses can't really fire employees, it's just terrible business); ...
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#35I understand that this is a touchy subject, especially on HN, but come on: "Avoid editing what you want to say in your head, and try not to worry about being wrong." This is straight from their Leadership Tips for Girls pdf. They are encouraging girls to just say whatever comes to mind. What's next - calling everyone who disagrees "sexist"?
That is highly disingenuous. The advice they gave, in context, was:
1.Speak Up _in Class_
Raise your hand, even when you’re not sure about the answer. Avoid editing what you want to say in your head, and try not to worry about being wrong. Speaking up isn’t about having the perfect answer. It gives you the experience of thinking on your feet, debating with others, and wrestling with an idea—all crucial skills that you’ll use in every area of your life.
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#36"Ban Bossy" Spokesperson: Beyoncé
Beyoncé Lyrics:
Bow down bitches, bow bow down bitches
Bow down bitches, bow bow down bitches
H-town vicious, h-h-town vicious
I’m so crown, bow bow down bitches
Beyoncé's husband Jay-Z Lyrics Excerpt:
My nigga, please - you ain't signing no checks like these
My nigga, please - you pushing no wheels like these
My nigga, please - you ain't holding no tecks like these
My nigga, please - you don't pop in vest like these
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#37Is there any empirical evidence this word harms girls?
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#38That's funny, I actually heard the word used when I was a military cadet in high school. It was used to teach the difference between being a a leader, or just, well bossy. Don't be a boss, don't act bossy, and so on. Bossy people, we were taught, boss people around by using their rank. No one wants to follow them, they just have to. That's the worst kind of leader, we were taught. don't be bossy was good feedback. A…
This is consistent with the OED's first use of the term, referring to a (female) being (inappropriately) "bossy". “a lady manager who was dreadfully bossy” (1882) The purpose of language is to provide for subtle distinctions.
Nice point.
The etymology of the word bossy, boss with the -y suffix, suggests that the lady manager is acting like a boss but she is not a boss. The writer here makes it clear that this is intended to have a negative connotation and is therefore questioning her authority.
Recent meme has reinforced that. If we want to express this idea positively, we don't say "bossy", we say "like a boss".
"Bossy" means you are acting like a boss but in a way which is disapproved of. If this word is targeted more often at women, then that deserves reflection (especially in cases where we would praise men for the same behaviour).
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#39I would rather "slut" gone, than bossy.
Re: Don't Ban “Bossy”
#40Earlier quoted context omitted.
There is at least a theoretical logic to banning words like this: if being called bossy is causing girls to lose leadership skills then maybe stopping this artificially (even if people still think it without saying it) could lead to less girls being affected, and therefore in the next generation the stigma has disappeared. Obviously it's not that simple, and I have no idea to what extent, if any, this actually works,…
> "if being called bossy is causing girls to lose leadership skills..." I don't think that this particular word is the root cause. More important is the reason why people are using it. If you ban that particular word without addressing why people are using it, then those people will adopt a new word to mean the exact same thing. Creating euphemism treadmills doesn't fix anything.
Yep. Some people are taking this too literally. (Nerds parsing? No!) The heightened awareness of how word choice subtly undermines behavior we presumably want to encourage, is the point. This article suggests that instead of banning, women embrace the word as a badge they're doing something right (a la 'nerd'), and undermining the undermining would work too.