OP here:
His donation page is at: https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/w704/beating-cancer-o... which can handle the load much better
Should have thought to put that up earlier
What Dreams May Come
21–30 of 399 posts
Re: What Dreams May Come
#22It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. Nobody deserves this sort of thing happening to them, and when it does happen, it hurts me to think they can't spend their last months on earth focused on enjoying time with their loved ones and instead have to live in fear that their family is going to be a…
We spend most of our lives, terminal or not, "worrying about" money. That's the beauty (or perhaps tragedy to some people) of a capitalist society. We are driven by our metric for value. It's not a bad thing.
Essentially, all lives are terminal (some just sooner than others). Unless you are a jelly fish. Fucking jelly fishes.
I'd say that worrying about money isn't completely bad thing.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#23I feel nothing but sympathy for Jonathan. I can barely imagine the pain he and his family would be going through :( What are the medical costs for someone with terminal cancer in the USA? I assume they're pretty astronomical, so I can understand why he'd ask for help (I'm donating myself). In terms of his house and the like, I was always led to believe that life insurance was specifically for cases like his? Is life…
It seems pretty common for employers to offer life cover in the UK (my wife has critical illness cover as well) - I have 4x annual salary from my employer, my wife has 3x from hers.
We also both have additional personal life cover for at least 6x annual salary.
This doesn't seem excessive cover to me - maybe because we are in our 40s with kids (and knowing people who have died and having close relatives who are terminally ill) makes you worry about these things more - I certainly didn't in my 20s.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#24Earlier quoted context omitted.
> It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. I thought nearly the same. But my thought went more along the lines of "it's sad that this person's highest priorities are all about money". If it's not in the face of death that you set your priorities on your own accord, then when is it? That said, I can…
Debts are generally not something you can leave to your family. They're generally expunged, barring joint debts and things like that. So run it all onto credit cards, by all means.
Not sure what the US reality on that is. In Portugal, you can and do inherit debt, though the monetary value of the inherited debt can never exceed that of the inherited assets.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#25It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. Nobody deserves this sort of thing happening to them, and when it does happen, it hurts me to think they can't spend their last months on earth focused on enjoying time with their loved ones and instead have to live in fear that their family is going to be a…
No one deserves this, especially not at 35. That is far too young. I've had more than a couple of people close to me pass away from cancer and other causes and it all seems very depressing that in some cases you can't really do anything at all.
Forgive me for asking but doesn't health insurance cover costs of cancer treatment even in the USA? I really don't want to sound like a narcissist and I'm not trying to judge in the least, but I'm curious why the OP wasn't more diligent about planning ahead in terms of health insurance given he made a decision to have/raise four children.
Do people really not take into account stuff like children's education, cost of living expenses per additional member of family, emergencies, black swan events? I know my parents decided to have only X number of kids because they knew that they wouldn't be able to provide well for more than X children. This was a conscious decision given that my father grew up with 7 siblings and my mom says she would have had more children if they would have been able to provide for them.
Also I'm genuinely curious whether $20,000 for a final resting place seems like a good amount to put on a list of priorities given all the other costs involved? Mortgage and transportation seem like good goals, but minus the cancer, if some one else decided to raise money from the internet to spend it on traveling, I'm not sure a lot of the comments would be so positive?
I'm really sorry for being so negative, but these are general questions that I have and they are in no way directed towards the OP. Cancer sucks. Period.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#26It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. Nobody deserves this sort of thing happening to them, and when it does happen, it hurts me to think they can't spend their last months on earth focused on enjoying time with their loved ones and instead have to live in fear that their family is going to be a…
> It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. I thought nearly the same. But my thought went more along the lines of "it's sad that this person's highest priorities are all about money". If it's not in the face of death that you set your priorities on your own accord, then when is it? That said, I can…
Reading this makes me glad we both have life insurance that pays off half the mortgage in case of our untimely death. That way, whoever is left behind will only have to deal with half the financial burden.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#27Earlier quoted context omitted.
There are over 7 billion people on the planet. A day doesn't go by without a story like this. We just don't hear about most of them. Someday a person like this will simply go to his doctor, get a prescription, and go on to live a normal life. Rather than dwelling on sadness, maybe we should ask if there isn't something we can do, as a group, to make that day arrive sooner. What would it take to cure, or at least trea…
Really quite a huge number of people are asking that question already. And a massively disproportionate amount of science funding goes towards cancer research. Far more people in the world die of communicable and vector-borne diseases or illness related to malnourishment. These issues get much less research attention and funding because so many people in the western world are focussed on cancer. So while my heart goe…
Can you provide any data or any additional clarity? There's enough food produced in the world, for example, but it just doesn't get to the people who need it. I'd like to add that I wasn't saying that money is necessarily the answer. The power of crowd-sourcing, for instance, can help in other ways.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#28It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. Nobody deserves this sort of thing happening to them, and when it does happen, it hurts me to think they can't spend their last months on earth focused on enjoying time with their loved ones and instead have to live in fear that their family is going to be a…
There are over 7 billion people on the planet. A day doesn't go by without a story like this. We just don't hear about most of them. Someday a person like this will simply go to his doctor, get a prescription, and go on to live a normal life. Rather than dwelling on sadness, maybe we should ask if there isn't something we can do, as a group, to make that day arrive sooner. What would it take to cure, or at least trea…
Without sounding unfeeling, do we really want to add to the overcrowding and population explosion problem that much?
Earth is full. Our population has doubled in the short time I've been alive. Doesn't that scare the shit out of anyone else?
Imagine what would happen if you suddenly cured all forms of cancer. People would live even longer. Population would shoot up. Lack of housing, lack of jobs. More pensioners...
edit: Downvote brigade... why am I wrong? What's going to save us from our own 'success'? How many more billion people can the planet take?
Re: What Dreams May Come
#29Earlier quoted context omitted.
> It's sad that when we find out something this devastating (you're dying), that we have to spend our last weeks/months/years worrying about, of all things, money. I thought nearly the same. But my thought went more along the lines of "it's sad that this person's highest priorities are all about money". If it's not in the face of death that you set your priorities on your own accord, then when is it? That said, I can…
Debts are generally not something you can leave to your family. They're generally expunged, barring joint debts and things like that. So run it all onto credit cards, by all means.
In Netherland, you can choose to refuse an inheritance. If you accept it, you get everything, including the debts; if you refuse it, you get nothing, not even small trinkets with sentimental value.
Though in the case of a mortgage, losing the debt also means losing the house. I totally understand wanting your family to be able to keep the house. Losing your dad/husband and also having to leave the house with all the memories of him, would suck double.
Re: What Dreams May Come
#30So the house you purchased and the van you upgraded to are not yours, disposing of your body costs more than a car, visiting family means you have to stay in a hotel, the basic survival needs of your wife and four children are not guaranteed and you want to visit Disneyland and meet celebrities before you die?
Capitalism is beautiful.