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My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

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Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#21

Post by danielweber »

grecy wrote: post #12

Will it take every single voting age person in America having a first-hand experience like this to change health care? How can any sane person prefer this over the alternative offered by Developed countries?

You say "the alternative" as if every other country on Earth has one system, and the US has a second system, and that first system is what we should have. Whereas all those other countries have a bunch of different systems (compare Canada to the UK to France to Singapore). And each of those systems has real tradeoffs for real people. (To be clear: I'd be fine with many, even most, of those tradeoffs, but people who aren't can't be convinced to my side just by insulting them.)

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#23

Post by meritt »

thatthatis wrote: post #18

Serious question: Why were these bills paid by the son who would have no financial obligation in the case of his mother's bankruptcy? America's health care safety net is bankruptcy and the 'cannot refuse critical treatment based on ability to pay' role of emergency rooms. Seems the right course to take in these situations is to string along the hospitals until it ends up in bankruptcy and only pay out of pocket from…

Because on-going treatment for a terminally-ill patient is not something the hospital will continue to do without being paid. They would cut her off.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#24

Post by pessimizer »

thatthatis wrote: post #18

Serious question: Why were these bills paid by the son who would have no financial obligation in the case of his mother's bankruptcy? America's health care safety net is bankruptcy and the 'cannot refuse critical treatment based on ability to pay' role of emergency rooms. Seems the right course to take in these situations is to string along the hospitals until it ends up in bankruptcy and only pay out of pocket from…

I don't think you can get treatment for your terminal cancer in the emergency room unless somebody stabbed you in it.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#25

Post by blablabla123 »

Horrible to hear. My mother died when I was at a similar age. Although there was little support from my family either, I live in Germany, so the state pays for Health care and there is welfare for people who cannot work.

And still the stress seemed overwhelming. But in comparison I really can't complain...

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#26

Post by soperj »

grecy wrote: post #12

Will it take every single voting age person in America having a first-hand experience like this to change health care? How can any sane person prefer this over the alternative offered by Developed countries?

Main reason I never want to live in America is health care. Just knowing that no matter what I'll be admitted to the hospital and treated is something I never want to live without. *2nd reason would be gun violence.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#27

Post by bippi »

thatthatis wrote: post #18

Serious question: Why were these bills paid by the son who would have no financial obligation in the case of his mother's bankruptcy? America's health care safety net is bankruptcy and the 'cannot refuse critical treatment based on ability to pay' role of emergency rooms. Seems the right course to take in these situations is to string along the hospitals until it ends up in bankruptcy and only pay out of pocket from…

I'm very sad it's come to this, but bankruptcy is what I was thinking.

That said, lets start the discussion:

a) They're only obligated to provide some treatment (Here's a band-aid for your tumor) to get to stability. That counts, right?

...and that seriously is the case. My aunt who had no insurance had to get a thyroid tumor removed. She got it done, but she had a less-than hospitable stay. Normally you get a day or two monitoring. She got...well... "Here's your homecare". I have to wonder

b) I've noticed they've gotten very good about seeing if you can pay or not. I don't know how legal it is, but like my elective birth control procedure was cash-n-carry (in a reputable clinic, even). My wife going to the ER got a scan of the discover card on admission.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#28

Post by altero »

EGreg wrote: post #20
thatthatis wrote: post #18

Serious question: Why were these bills paid by the son who would have no financial obligation in the case of his mother's bankruptcy? America's health care safety net is bankruptcy and the 'cannot refuse critical treatment based on ability to pay' role of emergency rooms. Seems the right course to take in these situations is to string along the hospitals until it ends up in bankruptcy and only pay out of pocket from…

Yes I hope there will be some discussion around this!

I would say naive folk fucked by the system.

In Europe it is kind of similar, but not as bad. My relative has non-lethal cancer. It was diagnosed by private doctor and waiting list for operation is a few months. So he called ambulance and went to public hospital with 'unknown pain'. The very same doctor (who also work in public hospital) diagnosed cancer second time and bumbed him on top of the list, since it is an 'emergency'.

Just in case someone ask about morals: it is very commom here. This guy has bellow average salary, worked 40 years and got medal for rescuing 5 soldiers in combat.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#29

Post by bippi »

meritt wrote: post #23
thatthatis wrote: post #18

Serious question: Why were these bills paid by the son who would have no financial obligation in the case of his mother's bankruptcy? America's health care safety net is bankruptcy and the 'cannot refuse critical treatment based on ability to pay' role of emergency rooms. Seems the right course to take in these situations is to string along the hospitals until it ends up in bankruptcy and only pay out of pocket from…

Because on-going treatment for a terminally-ill patient is not something the hospital will continue to do without being paid. They would cut her off.

Yeah, but they usually allow some level of payment or some time period before they call it late.

Re: My mom is dying, and my bank account is dry. I need help

#30

Post by brenschluss »

lobotryas wrote: post #14
helpmymomisx wrote: post #2

I’m 22. I’m stressed. Everything’s fucked up. My mom is dying. I need help. TL;DR If anyone has any work for me (strengths are Ruby/Rails, data mining) please email me. ilovemymomjeanine@gmail.com (will go to my professional email) -- This is in regards to https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7214446 If you’re in Minnesota and would like to meet with me, let’s meet. Very-long; will read: I’m posting here so I can ven…

To me it sounds like you never had a long-term plan for the treatment or your own future. You jumped in, blew your savings, and now you're stuck. It's too late for "could-have, should-have", but if you somehow manage to procure more money, at least consider alternatives such as slower treatment schedules or flying your mother to a country where such treatments are cheaper (India comes to mind as a potential option)[0…

>To me it sounds like you never had a long-term plan for the treatment or your own future. You jumped in, blew your savings, and now you're stuck.

You think that the OP is to blame for not having a long-term plan for a scenario in which one's very close family member is diagnosed with a previously unknown disease and $150k is not enough to take care of that?

You think this is an instance of poor planning on the OP's fault?

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