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How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

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Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#21

Post by jey »

asnyder wrote: post #9

This is a duplicate of https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7098563 Also, here's my .02 re-posted from the comments section: Rather than answer the questions that were important to him he decided to find a set of people he thought he would like then only answer the questions they care about, and not even the way he would naturally answer them, rather he used an algorithm to determine the weight that would be best to…

You're right that under the assumption that the OkCupid algorithms actually work, the best strategy is to just answer the questions honestly. If they don't really work all that well, just gaming it to give good results would be a rational strategy.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#22

Post by tunesmith »

birken wrote: post #6

I'll give the guy credit for coming up with a creative idea [1], but for a guy who was overly concerned with efficiency, going on 55 first dates and only 3 second dates strikes me as absolutely insane and a waste of time. It would be similar to having 55 in-person interviews and only making 3 offers. Something is going wrong in the funnel. I don't see how his system was better than just using the site as it is intend…

Those numbers didn't surprise me - in my online dating marathon, not aided by big data, I had roughly 100 first dates and less than a dozen second dates, before meeting my now-wife (via okcupid).

Hard to say the process didn't improve things for him, though - maybe he's distinct enough that compatibility for him is more rare than average.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#23

Post by asnyder »

jcc80 wrote: post #20
asnyder wrote: post #9

This is a duplicate of https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7098563 Also, here's my .02 re-posted from the comments section: Rather than answer the questions that were important to him he decided to find a set of people he thought he would like then only answer the questions they care about, and not even the way he would naturally answer them, rather he used an algorithm to determine the weight that would be best to…

I celebrate this. Two people found love and are getting married. I think it's great. He answered all questions truthfully but let the code determine the weight of each answer. It's not like he wasn't giving honest answers. And yes, he created two profiles, but then deleted one. He wasn't sure which group of women he'd match up with best. I guess you see this as fundamentally dishonest but I think the couple says it b…

Yes, but he ONLY answered those specific questions that were deemed important to his target audience. The fact that he answered these honestly is great, but he left out the set of questions that was important to him which would give him differing results and be more honest for his date. Also, weighting is somewhat important, by having an algorithm maximize this defeats the purpose.

Yes, if the point was to get two people in a room I could possibly go with that argument, but he could've spent a fraction of the time answering questions and then following up with people and end up in the same room. This feels like a rube golderberg machine for a date.

In any case I'm of course happy for him, but it rubs me the wrong way that this lying, manipulation, and outright disregard for the other users is being celebrated.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#24

Post by oafitupa »

asnyder wrote: post #9

This is a duplicate of https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7098563 Also, here's my .02 re-posted from the comments section: Rather than answer the questions that were important to him he decided to find a set of people he thought he would like then only answer the questions they care about, and not even the way he would naturally answer them, rather he used an algorithm to determine the weight that would be best to…

Yeah he shouldn't be getting married now, he should be following the ToS of some website.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#25

Post by gweinberg »

a8da6b0c91d wrote: post #19
TillE wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The questions are an excellent initial filter if you've flagged a few obvious deal breakers. It's the FizzBuzz of dating. Then you move on to personally examining the profiles of people who have passed that test, contact them, and so on. It's certainly not an optimal system for casual sex, but it does a reasonable job of finding candidates for any relationship more serious than that.

But people are totally full of it on what their deal breakers are. They'll thoughtfully answer a survey one way but then behave very differently in smelly meatspace.

Hey, if you can come up with something better, there's a market opportunity. Matching people up by scent isn't the worst idea I've heard.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#27

Post by fchollet »

cocoflunchy wrote: post #18
asnyder wrote: post #9

This is a duplicate of https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7098563 Also, here's my .02 re-posted from the comments section: Rather than answer the questions that were important to him he decided to find a set of people he thought he would like then only answer the questions they care about, and not even the way he would naturally answer them, rather he used an algorithm to determine the weight that would be best to…

Yeah, I feel like all he did in the end is find a way of getting a lot of people interested in his profile (by tweaking the score so that it would be as close as 100% as possible) and then go on a lot of dates.The real issue here is probably the asymmetry in male/female messages and requests rates on OkCupid...

I always thought that the messaging asymmetry on dating sites was purely a reflection of the real-world asymmetry of dating, where females will almost never initiate a flirt sequence themselves. The universal expectation is that it is the role of the male to manifest interest in, and worthiness of, the female. Not that I agree with this, but it would be difficult not to observe it.

I remember reading somewhere that there were actually more female users of these dating sites. So the difference would be purely one of behavioral habits.

Thinking about it, I can't think of a single animal species where the female is the one seeking out the males. Then again, evolutionary analogies are very un-PC around here.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#28

Post by crazygringo »

It's funny... doing all this 'hacking' to create profiles with awesome match %'s... is pretty pointless. In my personal experience, a match below 80% is a red flag (serious incompatibilities), but above 85% there aren't any big differences.

Like he said, he went on 55 dates, but only three second dates. The 55 dates really isn't too hard to do without the hacking, it's just a question of time. And the "three second dates" means his filter wasn't even that great -- he probably would have done better just simply browsing on the site, and only directly messaging the girls he found interesting in the first place.

But the real interesting thing here is the clustering into 7 types of women -- that's fantastic! I'd love to read more about that -- if he could write it up in a blog, OkTrends-style, I feel like it could get a huge number of hits. I think tons of people, including myself, would be interested in the details, especially if he did it for both men and women.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#29

Post by barrkel »

mgraczyk wrote: post #15
birken wrote: post #6

I'll give the guy credit for coming up with a creative idea [1], but for a guy who was overly concerned with efficiency, going on 55 first dates and only 3 second dates strikes me as absolutely insane and a waste of time. It would be similar to having 55 in-person interviews and only making 3 offers. Something is going wrong in the funnel. I don't see how his system was better than just using the site as it is intend…

This is a little bit off topic, but although I agree that [1] does fail the categorical imperative, it isn't because "If everybody did this okcupid would be much worse off." The categorical imperative is not a consequentialist motivation. It doesn't say, "Don't do X if doing so would make Y worse off."

The guy you're replying to didn't say "Don't do X if doing so would make Y worse off" for any values of X or Y.

Re: How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love

#30

Post by a8da6b0c91d »

fchollet wrote: post #27
cocoflunchy wrote: post #18

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, I feel like all he did in the end is find a way of getting a lot of people interested in his profile (by tweaking the score so that it would be as close as 100% as possible) and then go on a lot of dates.The real issue here is probably the asymmetry in male/female messages and requests rates on OkCupid...

I always thought that the messaging asymmetry on dating sites was purely a reflection of the real-world asymmetry of dating, where females will almost never initiate a flirt sequence themselves. The universal expectation is that it is the role of the male to manifest interest in, and worthiness of, the female. Not that I agree with this, but it would be difficult not to observe it. I remember reading somewhere that t…

> females will almost never initiate a flirt sequence

It's the opposite. In environments like parties and bars women subtly initiate most interactions. They maneuver closer and do the glance thing.

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