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I never finish anyth

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Re: I never finish anyth

#51

I read somewhere recently that if you fantasize/talk about your ideas/goals it triggers your brain to let you feel a similar satisfaction for actually accomplishing the said idea/goal. Of course now I can't find the article so take it with a grain of salt. I did find this article which is related… http://blog.bufferapp.com/how-our-brains-stop-us-achieving-o...

This is probably what you're recalling: http://sivers.org/zipit

The article argues that the satisfaction prevents us from actually reaching our goals.

Re: I never finish anyth

#53
post #27

Just some encouragement here for you good people... You have to do the work. There is no one else that can do it for you. It is entirely up to you; actually, it has only ever been you, because it is you that rolls out of bed early to bring it. No one is going to do that for you. If you want to do it, then you will figure out a way to make it happen. Like some of you, I have a family. That makes things a bit challengi…

Personally I think realizing you need to engage your will and discipline yourself into working hard when you don't want to is the easy part. The really really hard part is actually doing it. How do you find will where there is none? How do you motivate yourself when you feel unmotivated about everything? When you feel stuck in the rat race, stuck in the routine of monotony? How can I restore the drive and motivation…

Thanks! It is nice to know I'm not the only one going trough this. Let me know if you find the/an/your answer!

Some things I've noticed: Being physically fit helps and doing sport is a bit easier than overthrowing the world. Maybe ask a friend to go with you.

Sleep is also easily modified: Try out the effects of light, temperature, noise, sleep duration etc. Maybe use Melatonine or a sleep cycle alarm.

It's also a lot easier to do things when I don't have to do them. If I tell myself, I _have_ to run today in order to get fit I probably won't do it. But just going outside quickly for some fresh air? Sure, let's check the mailbox ... and now that I'm outside, why not run for a bit?

It's a bit like jumping out of the bed before the brain realizes what you're doing and has no time to scream "I don't want to wake up!" :)

Re: I never finish anyth

#54
Sadly this is why employers and early investors give preference to Ivy League graduates. That's likely because the programs ensure graduates are most likely to push the bar higher and achieve. But those who make the exception list (achievers non-league) turn out to be even stronger achievers because their determination comes from deep within rather than from training.

Disclosure: I'm not a leaguer.

Re: I never finish anyth

#57
This might be a bit cogsci, but one thing that has really helped me over the years is to switch my mental language away from statements like "I never finish anything", to statements like "I have had trouble finishing things in the past."

The first is a static judgment I am applying to myself, and it's a definitional straitjacket. The second is simply an observation, and it leaves room and opportunity for positive change.

When we tell ourselves we "are" certain things or "always/never do" certain things, we are defining ourselves in a way that makes it harder to change, due to the reinforcement.

At this point, I pretty much automatically recognize negative "judgments" and do the translation... I think it helps a lot.

Re: I never finish anyth

#58
post #27

Just some encouragement here for you good people... You have to do the work. There is no one else that can do it for you. It is entirely up to you; actually, it has only ever been you, because it is you that rolls out of bed early to bring it. No one is going to do that for you. If you want to do it, then you will figure out a way to make it happen. Like some of you, I have a family. That makes things a bit challengi…

Personally I think realizing you need to engage your will and discipline yourself into working hard when you don't want to is the easy part. The really really hard part is actually doing it. How do you find will where there is none? How do you motivate yourself when you feel unmotivated about everything? When you feel stuck in the rat race, stuck in the routine of monotony? How can I restore the drive and motivation…

In a wilderness we would be turned into someone's food very quickly, but luckily nowadays in our world you don't really have to work that hard to survive. If you can't do all the things that you dream of right now, maybe you are simply over-ambitious. Try to move your focus from the things that you didn't do and focus instead on something else, more realistic that can be done. Do one thing, but do it right. And then work your way up from there...

Re: I never finish anyth

#59

I relate to this, too. Here's some stuff that I read recently that helped me a little: "When you are young, beginning new projects is easy and finishing them is hard. As you grow older, beginnings get harder, but finishing gets easier. At least, that has been my experience. I think it is true of anyone of at least average intelligence, creativity and emotional resilience. The reason is simple. When you are young, the…

When I compared people that take on big goals later in life with those who simply simulate them in their mind, then decide their projected end results are 'predictable and uninteresting', I saw something interesting.

Those who take on big goals are seen as naive and almost childlike, because the 'experienced' believe they already know the end results.

Those who don't take on big goals get to be in the audience and throw stones, but never really amount to anything other than gloating at a possible failure.

I think the experience works against you at a certain age. The projections are a lie, or possibly inaccurate at best. I've come to believe you don't know what will happen until you do it -- what your mind simulates is often only correct in the broadest sense, but way way off when it comes to the important details and compound ramifications.

In otherwords, keep taking on big goals and press on to finish them, while ignoring that pesky voice which thinks it already knows how this will all turn out. And ignore the people who do the same, their words are rarely helpful.

Re: I never finish anyth

#60

I relate to this, too. Here's some stuff that I read recently that helped me a little: "When you are young, beginning new projects is easy and finishing them is hard. As you grow older, beginnings get harder, but finishing gets easier. At least, that has been my experience. I think it is true of anyone of at least average intelligence, creativity and emotional resilience. The reason is simple. When you are young, the…

I've never actually changed my approach since 25. I don't have much interest in doing something I've done before, so everything I try is always new, which means I can't even begin to estimate what's involved in completing it. I just approach it with the attitude "Well, how hard can it be?"

There are two necessary factors to great feats: The foolhardiness to start, and the stubbornness to finish.

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