We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online • Hacker News Board

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#61

Post by dgabriel » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 5:48 PM UTC

debacle wrote: post #10

mashmac2 wrote: post #2

Does anyone else do this (or something similar)? I'm curious to see how people introduce the Internet to their children in a relatively-responsible way.

My son (9) has a Minecraft account, a Steam account, and an email address which he doesn't know the password to (because he wouldn't remember it). His main interaction thusfar has been chatting with people in Minecraft and on Steam, which concerns me only over the language.

Mine, too (he's 11). He's also got an XBox live account for Portal 2, a youtube / gmail (mostly for videos about Minecraft and Kerbal Space Program), and an account here: http://scratch.mit.edu/ .

None of these things existed 11 years ago, and I expect there will be a new set of things 11 years hence.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#62

Post by ryansan » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 5:49 PM UTC

Provocative article, but as with many things, the answer lies somewhere in the middle.

I think it's cute people think social networks (in their current form) will still be around in 18 years. Technology will be in a place that probably very few of us can fathom at this current juncture. I like one of the users' comments on here that the act of registering all of these accounts for their child is akin to registering a geocities name back in the day. We all laugh at it now.

Like I said, the answer is somewhere in the middle. You don't have to do all or nothing. Just be judicious, as you would in your non-digital life (I would hope). Anything in excess can become problematic.

When my partner and I have a child some day, we'll probably be very careful about what we post online. It won't be excessive, but we won't be hermits either as unexisting can be just as odd/problematic as superexisting.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#63

Post by jonknee » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 5:52 PM UTC

cromwellian wrote: post #41

You live life, you leave a trail, this hasn't changed in the digital world, only made more convenient. For your kids to live in the world of the future and interact with others, they will need an identity, it is unavoidable unless they want to live off-the-grid in bush country. We can see grade school and high school pictures of famous celebrities because pictures were taken with analog film cameras once. We can see…

> Maybe you're not taking pictures of your daughter, but someone else will, and they can tag her with metadata for their own purposes.

The article didn't mention anything about not taking photos, it was simply about not sharing them publicly in any fashion. That's pretty much how it has been until the past few years--most photos were kept private.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#64

Post by codegeek » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 5:56 PM UTC

Sorry this article has everything wrong about it. Reading this article makes me feel bad for the daughter of the author. I mean seriously ? A classic example of bad parenting in my opinion. So you are not going to post anything online. great. What about offline ? What about living life ? Everything has a trail, everything. This online post by the author itself has a trail that can be tracked to their daughter if someone really wants to.

Kids are not some kind of machine or algorithm that you can program in certain way. Seriously, what's wrong with some parents. Teach your kids the value of privacy by taking a balanced approach and not doing crazy things like reserving domain names and what not. Just because you are not posting anything online does not mean there is no trail. There always is and who knows what the digital world will be like in 20 years.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#65

Post by incongruity » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:05 PM UTC

snowwrestler wrote: post #50

I think this is, digitally, fighting the last war. Kids grow up in their own world, not ours. The idea of checking domain names and Instagram account names before choosing the child's name is hilarious to me. Like domain names and Instagram are going to matter to teenagers 16 years from now.

Domain names are about as close as you can get to infrastructure digital world - so, they may matter - but perhaps not.

Instagram? Who's to say - but my hunch is you're right.

We purchased a few name related domain names for our firstborn - if they're useless or unwanted, so it goes, but the downside risk seemed minor enough that I decided to go for it. I mean, when you compare it with all the other kid gear that gets used for 2-12 months before it's outgrown, domain names are a cheap extravagance. (Even when considering the holding cost)

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#66

Post by hoopism » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:05 PM UTC

This is dumb beyond belief.

Amazing how important some people believe themselves and their little angels to be. If my 3 month old daughter grows up to be significant enough that my bathtub picture of her somehow has impact on her future then I hope to have raised her well enough to recognize the humor in that situation.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#67

Post by samgrover » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:06 PM UTC

I'm not sure how they intend to police photos of their daughter as taken by cameras not under their control, or on accounts not under their control, or other information posted about her by friends and family. Given the technologies involved, it would not be terribly hard to infer the daughter's photographs and personal information (name, etc.) and connect the two. There's also the very real possibility that she may not be interested in their idea of her personality and identity by the time she's grown up.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#68

Post by mturmon » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:06 PM UTC

nonchalance wrote: post #48

rayiner wrote: post #11

I'm a new parent and my wife and I are not taking any measures to minimize our kid's Facebook exposure. As a general rule, it's pretty safe to "do what everybody else is doing." If Facebook albums parents made for kids when they were little come back to haunt this coming generation as a group, the ills will be remedied either by making or using certain sorts of analysis illegal (the college application hypothetical)…

> do what everybody else is doing Obligatory Godwin law reference aside, this logic has led to many historical problems

Your allusion to the Holocaust demonstrates why this analogy is not helpful in this case, nor in most other cases.

The comment specifically says "As a general rule, it's pretty safe...".

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#69

Post by hoopism » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:09 PM UTC

vasilipupkin wrote: post #57

ef4 wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'll grant that it's logically possible. But I don't really understand why people think it's disadvantageous if others can find out whether or not you were cute when you were two years old. I think it has more to do with fear of what's new than any logical argument. Putting my money where my mouth is, here is my son: http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7402/9525304181_8da5d48e22_b.j... In what future dystopia will the pres…

I think the main issue is that the kids are not given any choice about appearing online when you post their pictures there. They should have at least some choice in the matter, it seems.

Kids have no say in anything... hence why you're liable for them till 18. It's a parents obligation to embarrass them... just easier now with social media.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#70

Post by blah32497 » Wed, Sep 04, 2013, 6:09 PM UTC

roc wrote: post #26

This seems incredibly odd to me. On one hand, they indicate strongly valued privacy with the "no posts about the child" rule; seemingly recognizing the hidden costs of permissive 'oversharing'. But, on the other hand, they place a very high importance on reserving (vanity) domain and user names, securing the right for her to sharecrop out her personal information in as-accurate-a-means as possible; reinforcing the va…

People keep saying facebook will disappear... but maybe it won't? Maybe it will become like email, less used but ever-present.