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Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

wednesdaynight.me

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Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#41

Post by jmtame »

jerrya wrote: post #31
jmtame wrote: post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Good questions. - If we can't setup a match, you are either being unrealistic with your expectations (you consistently pass too often on people who we think are a good fit), or we just don't have enough people in the pool who are in your proximity. If it's the former, you'll need to adjust your expectations, if it's the latter, we'll focus more attention on that area. If we just can't make it work, we'll give you a r…

Do you exist in all zip codes of the US? If you are only supporting certain zip codes then I'm going to be real annoyed when I enter half a dozen questions and THEN you tell me you're not available in my zip code.

If you live close to a major city (SF, NYC, LA, Chicago, Austin, Miami, Seattle) we can do it. If you don't, I would suggest waiting until we grow the user base out more.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#43

Post by mtowle »

jmtame wrote: post #40
damoncali wrote: post #37

If you're too busy for online dating, aren't you too busy for dating in general? Seems like a vanishingly small market - people willing to pay $75 for a date, but unwilling to take the time to look on match.com. But I'm usually wrong about this sort of thing, so carry on!

It'd be a false dichotomy if you said "people who are too busy to date are too busy for falling in love" or something similar. People are busy and online dating eats up more time than any other type of application, including social networking. Matchmaking is already going on and successful relationships have been established that way, we just make it more affordable and transparent. Linx Dating charges $30,000 for 11…

Hey man,

Just wanted to say you're doing an A+ job of responding to people's concerns here in the thread. People usually suck at this, too, but you've really got your shit down. Which, to me, demonstrates that you've been working the product over and over in your head, i.e., the opposite of what everybody else in this space is doing.

Because you're absolutely right. Fuck the Match.coms. Fuck the click click click click model. I'm not 16. I have neither the time nor the inclination.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#44

Post by bobwaycott »

Wednesday Night:

I'd be tempted to sign up with Facebook and receive a reply on exactly what kind of person you'd try to connect me to, given what you glean from FB.

If you got it right, I'd be a step closer to giving you money (if you operated near me). If you got it wrong, and I freely admit that I expect you will, I'd keep my money.

Either way, I am able to determine the quality of your service. I regularly spend $75 in a bar and have no trouble meeting people, despite how busy I am. You don't provide a compelling reason to give that $75 to you instead of my friendly local bartenders.

Meeting people isn't the problem. Meeting the right person, with whom I'd be interested in more than sharing a few drinks and conversation, is the problem. My closest friends of more than a decade, who know me exceedingly better than FB, have routinely tried to connect me with someone or other. Not one has been the right fit.

Hell, just cos I'm feeling generous, I'd even give you a hint and say one of your staffers has the look. But that wears off in about 2.3 minutes.

DoubleHell, just cos I'm feeling that much more generous, let me suggest (if you haven't already thought of it) that you mesh HN activity with FB activity for an even better understanding.

Sadly, to my knowledge, we haven't yet figured out a way to determine likelihood of chemistry between superficially compatible people. Perhaps I'm just a naysayer, but until we can figure that out, online dating just isn't working. Apparently almost 75% of US single people have tried online dating. Only 20% have found committed relationships (assuming that's everyone's goal, which it isn't).[1]

We need a chemistry detector, not a compatibility detector (machine or human).

[1]: quick search leads me to stats from 2012 at http://www.statisticbrain.com/online-dating-statistics/

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#45

Post by tomp »

disc wrote: post #36
jmtame wrote: post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We never started with the thought "why don't we use FB to build a dating site." Facebook is simply a means to solve a lot of different problems that come up in dating, and it ends up providing a better experience. That's all we care about.

Just to give you one user's perspective (which honestly, by virtue of being a HN reader probably represents a very small fraction of general users); anytime I see a service that requests I login via FB or Google, I assume you're trying to mine my personal data. Unless you are Facebook, or Google, or maybe LinkedIn (with whom I'm already willing to share my personal data) I'm not going to use these options. Make this…

But they are trying to mine your personal data, to confirm that you're real, and to get to know you better so that they can match you. It's really all up there on their website.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#46

Post by jmtame »

alex_doom wrote: post #42
cupcake-unicorn wrote: post #15

This might be a weird comment, but the service seems very alcohol oriented - meeting at a bar, covering drinks. What about people who don't drink?

There are people who don't drink? ;)

Who would've thought? :)

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#47

Post by jmtame »

mtowle wrote: post #43
jmtame wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It'd be a false dichotomy if you said "people who are too busy to date are too busy for falling in love" or something similar. People are busy and online dating eats up more time than any other type of application, including social networking. Matchmaking is already going on and successful relationships have been established that way, we just make it more affordable and transparent. Linx Dating charges $30,000 for 11…

Hey man, Just wanted to say you're doing an A+ job of responding to people's concerns here in the thread. People usually suck at this, too, but you've really got your shit down. Which, to me, demonstrates that you've been working the product over and over in your head, i.e., the opposite of what everybody else in this space is doing. Because you're absolutely right. Fuck the Match.coms. Fuck the click click click cli…

Thank you. I think some people's concerns are valid. There's a quote that I really like: "The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference." - Eli Wiesel

In other words, we'd rather have people pissed off or uncertain about something than to not care at all.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#48

Post by Zakharov »

jmtame wrote: post #9
goeric wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Grouper is growing like crazy and requires Facebook. This is basically Grouper, without the group, and way too expensive ($75 per date? Are you kidding?). I would also say much less appealing then Grouper as well, because going solo is a much harder sell, at least to the younger demographic.

I've been on a few Groupers. The reason they ask you to bring friends is because they're setting you up on a blind date. If the blind date goes bad and there's no chemistry, your friends act as a hedge against having a bad night. Sure, the girls may not be good, but you've still got your friends so you can go somewhere else afterwards. When we setup drinks, you see who you're going out with, so it isn't blind. You kn…

Meeting someone interesting isn't the worst case scenario. Meeting someone creepy is the worst-case (realistic) scenario, but in any case, thinking about the worst-case is kind of silly.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#49

Post by jmtame »

Zakharov wrote: post #48
jmtame wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've been on a few Groupers. The reason they ask you to bring friends is because they're setting you up on a blind date. If the blind date goes bad and there's no chemistry, your friends act as a hedge against having a bad night. Sure, the girls may not be good, but you've still got your friends so you can go somewhere else afterwards. When we setup drinks, you see who you're going out with, so it isn't blind. You kn…

Meeting someone interesting isn't the worst case scenario. Meeting someone creepy is the worst-case (realistic) scenario, but in any case, thinking about the worst-case is kind of silly.

Sure, there could be some mistakes but we find out every time it happens and we make effort to prevent it in the first place. On dating sites where there's no identity, you can go out and be creepy or misbehave all you want and you'll never get caught. We follow up with our members every time they go out to make sure they're having a good time.

If someone abuses the system, it was either intentional or accidental. If it was accidental, we may give them another chance. Dating is tough. But if it was intentional or over the top, then we're either going to refund, ban the other person, or some combination. As long as the experience is good, that's all we care about. If someone was like "he was awkward and I didn't feel comfortable, but I don't think he realized he was doing it" then we'd probably just let it go the first time and say something. I think anything weird that happens ultimately stems from nervousness or inexperience. Some guys (and possibly girls?) just need some instruction and guidance, which is why we also offer the coaching as a free service.

Re: Show HN: Too busy for online dating? Try Wednesday Night

#50

Post by damoncali »

jmtame wrote: post #40
damoncali wrote: post #37

If you're too busy for online dating, aren't you too busy for dating in general? Seems like a vanishingly small market - people willing to pay $75 for a date, but unwilling to take the time to look on match.com. But I'm usually wrong about this sort of thing, so carry on!

It'd be a false dichotomy if you said "people who are too busy to date are too busy for falling in love" or something similar. People are busy and online dating eats up more time than any other type of application, including social networking. Matchmaking is already going on and successful relationships have been established that way, we just make it more affordable and transparent. Linx Dating charges $30,000 for 11…

I think I focused on the headline too much. Democratizing personalized matchmaking is interesting. I look forward to watching this play out.
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