Bull. There are plenty of smart ppl successful in this area just as there are plenty of average guys unsuccessful at it.
Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
81–90 of 160 posts
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#82Woman did not evolve to find smart guys or "nice" guys attractive. Woman are programmed to find the leader of the pack attractive, even if said leader is an a hole. Fortunately, most well raised woman were taught with their rational minds to be wary of the jerk and to go for the gentleman. So rationally they want the nice guy, but the animal mind wants the leader of the pack. This creates conflict. If you've ever bee…
I expected that link to be the general "girls love jerks, so act like one" pick-up artist BS, but quite to the contrary. The tip/story about going to house parties once in a relationship is particularly relevant (and something I wish I'd have read in my younger days!).
That being said, lot of the time most of the guys who complain that they can't get a girlfriend because they're "a nice guy" are generally just inexperienced and going after women who are out of their league. If they lowered their expectations -- and actually made an effort to find out what they really are looking for (rather than drive themselves insane over women they saw as "perfect") -- they wouldn't have had that complaint.
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#83As I mentioned in a different comment, I think the issue boils down to having unrealistic expectations -- and these unrealistic expectations preventing smart individuals from getting any sort of experience in dating (which builds confidence) or finding out what they really want (e.g. Are you unable to date someone who doesn't share your political views? Who isn't a fellow nerd? who doesn't have a specific body type? You'll never whether any of these "must haves" is really something you're looking for until you try).
In addition, getting into physical shape wouldn't hurt: initial attraction (what gets you the first date) is still mostly physical and being in good shape makes one confident (which gets you past the first three dates). Being in shape will also give you far more energy for 80 work weeks and all night hackathons (in no way, will being physically fit magically make you into a "jock").
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#84Being smart won't get you a lot of things. OTOH, being smart at getting yourself laid will almost certainly get you laid.
learn his/her buttons
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#85Happy coincidence - work is sending me to Duesseldorf on Monday!
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#86It won't get you laid-off either!
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#87Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#88Earlier quoted context omitted.
> But seriously, I'm not willing to "get some" because it requires me to do things I don't want or willing to. What are the things that you don't want to do or are unwilling to do that you think would get you laid?
According to my mom, I am unwilling to make any attempt to improve myself in any way
According to your mom, I don't need to.
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#89I'll sum it up: for a nice guy, the onus is on the female to say "yes" to his advances (if any) and for the dark-triad male, the onus is on her to say "no" to his advances.
As sexuality today is still very much mostly a powerful unconscious drive, it is harder for most females to say "yes" than "no," because saying yes is a conscious decision and the female instead finds it easier to remain passive to her powerful unconscious side around these aholes, and which is why she's even interested in either in the first place.
Aholes can muscle in on the nice guy, and we have not reached the tipping point for many females to take better control of their sexuality.
In the end you can be a nice guy, but when the ahole comes along, be prepared. Don't leave it up to her to say yes.
Re: Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
#90One thing that helped me a lot: investing some money in some salsa dancing lessons. First of all, I actually enjoy it, it's fun (if you don't like it you wont' get far). Second, it's sort of cool, compared to, say, talking about startups and computers with someone who is potentially not interested in either one. Also, it's something where practice does pay off, and where you can't fake it, so investing some time will…
Sounds like a great idea, especially for people that spend most of their time in an engineering school. It puts you in a different crowd and takes you outside of the sexless place you spend your days.