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I knew exactly how she felt
21–30 of 294 posts
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#22I'm not sure the author quite understood the seeing Star Wars thing was a super low bar fitness test. Once long ago my new wife asked me why geeks always wear tshirts with obscure references that no one gets. I was slightly put out by the question until I figured it out. They're a uniform. It's how we id the friendlies on the battlefield.
it's the movie equivalent of atoi()
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#23How old is the young woman the author spoke with? Don't most smart, geeky people in HS feel a bit out of place? There's a whole PG essay on that [1].
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#24I said that’s what happens when we hold events for women in IT when there aren’t that many women in this industry – we tend to broaden the definition of women in IT. I can't really speak to this point, but I am curious, when did computer science and software engineering get rolled into IT? 15 years ago, I would not have said software developers, software engineers, or test engineers were part of IT. IT was that depar…
> 15 years ago, I would not have said software developers, software engineers, or test engineers were part of IT. IT was that department that kept the corporate computers working and worked for the CFO, not part of the department that shipped products and worked for the VP Engineering.
When I worked for an enterprise software company close to 15 years ago, there was clear recognition of both IT-as-internal-organization and IT-as-industry, and both people who worked in IT-as-internal-organization and people who worked in the development and support of products in firms in IT-as-industry were widely recognized as working "in IT". AFAICT, that is exactly the same situation as now.
(This shouldn't be surprising, since IT-as-industry is effectively just the outsourced version of IT-as-internal-organization.)
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#25I will offer an experience which is the inverse of this!
I am a male software engineer who works in fashion (and before this I worked in wine.) I knew nothing about wine when I started, and my fashion sense is prototypically, well, male-software-centric.
People in the wine industry are palpably aware that people view it as "hoity-toity". Professionals I've worked with are usually very gracious in explaining what it means when you say a wine is "dark" or "buttery" because that pretentious image is something we want to overcome.
Fashion is a bit different. "I like that chambray shirt!" What? "Erm, that's, uh, that denim material you're wearing." Oh.
Or "I saw someone next door with an Hermes bag; it was gorgeous." Everyone had quite a laugh when I asked who Hermes was. Or expressed surprise that the Vogue Spring edition is the one where they show off new styles, which is why it's so thick and has so few ads. Or the difference between hair paste and hair gel.
I feel like there is a bigger lesson in this story: I've got to stop making people feel silly for not getting my Star Wars references, and they've got to understand that there's no logical reason I'd know anything about the big names in fashion. I occasionally meet people who get this - you know your domain and I know mine, and we can still talk to each other without othering.
And that skill - of being able to get along with your PM even though they "clearly don't know anything about code" - is one worth developing.
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#26[deleted]
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#27This sounds like the equivalent of a male nerd complaining about "brogrammers"
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#28She shouldn't feel bad. I've never seen more than a few minutes of Star Wars or Star Trek. Never seen Dr. Who or any of the Monty Python stuff. I've never seen a single Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter movie (or read the books). But I keep telling myself that one day I'll binge through them all online.
But it's okay. There will always be something else to talk about, and it's not like every technical person out there loves everything you name and then some. That's not what defines us.
Sadly... I have received criticism and ridicule from some for liking things like knitting (talk about a minority), WoW, and My Little Pony. Doctor Who, LotR, Firefly, EVE Online and all that stuff is usually "awesome!" and untouchable. Beyond me why this stupid double standard exists.
Or, how I spent one Harry Potter midnight book release waiting in line watching Grey's Anatomy (the medical romance/drama on ABC). Big freaking deal.
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#29This post could have been a reddit comment.
You're talking about your post in the comment thread, right?
Re: I knew exactly how she felt
#30"But for some girls, it feels like women are alienating the girls who want to be in IT."
For most children, up through high school, it feels like they're being alienated by their peers for being "different."