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My experience has been the same; I've always found it amusing.
> I've also wondered if it's just a coincidence that the US's tech center is also a historically gay-friendly place. I think it probably is just a coincidence.
I think it is largely coincidence. The reasons that SV is a tech center are completely independent of the reasons that SF is a gay mecca (and both have pretty traceable causes).
Furthermore, I have a lot of gay friends in SF, and I have a lot of tech friends in SF, but the intersection between those two circles is very small - not only do I not have many gay tech friends in SF, but my gay friends in the Bay Area are very disconnected from tech circles (or at least, as much as you can be in the Bay Area).
Despite this, I know there are a number of gay engineers; in an attempt to connect this community, a friend and I started an NYC meetup for LGBT engineers: http://www.meetup.com/Identity-Hackers/ (yes, shameless plug!)