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I Need Help

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Re: I Need Help

#51

Post by turnwhere »

cowpewter wrote: post #35
EvanKelly wrote: post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is an excellent idea. Living alone can help create an "echo chamber" (for lack of a better term) for negative emotions. Dogs (especially trained companion dogs) almost never contribute to these negative emotions. Having someone/something to care for and who depends on you is sometimes a substantial boost to one's psyche.

Yes. I suffered from clinical depression years ago, and the number one thing that stopped me from ever harming myself was knowing that my cat was completely dependent on me. Even if I had arranged matters so I knew I would be found before she could starve or anything, I knew she wouldn't understand why I was gone. Those thoughts always triggered a huge sobbing jag, but they kept me alive.

These are all interesting points. In terms of caring for something, and something being dependent on me, I know that this would stop me wanting to kill myself so much - but it would be out of guilt. I already have that feeling for my mother. I want to find a positive reason to live, instead of what I see as a reverse negative.

The traveling thing - it's funny you should mention that. A month ago I did exactly this. I've left my business running and I've gone to another country. I am trying to spend as much time as possible volunteering, to help other people, as I thought this might help me. So far unfortunately I have felt very bad here. I am not entirely sure why. I will be here for another 2 months before I return.

Re: I Need Help

#53

Post by turnwhere »

tylerhwillis wrote: post #22
rauar wrote: post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Changing your life is one thing. leaving behind everyone this guy knows personally and potentially could help sounds like a big mistake... especially with anxiety attacks and severe depression.

+1, an incredibly important point. Feeling detached/disconnected from the world is one cause of depression. Feeling disconnected is a logical outcome of changing everything about your life all at once. Changing habits/attitudes/etc. is important, but I'd try to do it incrementally - testing to see if these changes improve your experience, while focusing on maintaining and strengthening connections to things that you…

Very good points.

As in my reply above, I have in fact pretty much just done this. I went to South America last month and will be for a few months, volunteering. I left everything behind and rarely talk to anyone I know. I think I may have expected too much of myself, being able to handle this. Incremental sounds more sensible.

Re: I Need Help

#54

Post by turnwhere »

cstrat wrote: post #23
kirpi wrote: post #5

i would spent sometime in nature. no car, no crowd, no tv nothing but trees, animals, all natural sound. thats my dream.i know what i need.

Yes this is great. I love laying on the grass in a big park. Just breathing and staring at the sky... very relaxing. If you can't get out to find a park, go watch fish. I find staring at fish in a bowl is an amazing way to relax your mind. I can totally zone out and forget my worries just watching a couple fish swim around a tank.

It's amazing how simple things can be. I wouldn't think of that but it's worth a go, even if just as a distraction.

Re: I Need Help

#55

Post by turnwhere »

chicagoblues wrote: post #4

Have you tried the usual more exercise and herbal remedies like Kava Kava... you can also Pray to a higher power... taking one's life is the ultimate selfish act...

I've spent more time than I can remember thinking about how suicide is selfish. It is selfish. Everything is selfish. When someone helps another person cross the road, it's selfish. They do it because they feel good. That's not bad, it's life. The issue is not whether it's selfish to commit suicide, it's what has got a person to that point. If the hell inside my head doesn't let up, eventually I have to kill myself out of desperation. To see that as selfish in my opinion is missing the point.

Re: I Need Help

#56

Post by frendiversity »

Get on board TEAM JESUS. Seriously. People here don't like it (and most of them are as depressed as you half of the time), but basically, you've replaced your spirituality with corporate and technological cults.

Re: I Need Help

#57

Post by orangethirty »

turnwhere wrote: post #43
orangethirty wrote: post #39

First of all, its OK to feel a bit overwhelmed. Life is not so simple to deal with. We have many pressures to handle. I want you to know that by posting this you have taken control of your life. That is the first step towards feeling better about yourself. I want you to put off any immediate plan you may have. Don't make any quick decisions. Let time pass for a bit. With your new found control, go and do something po…

This is a really sweet reply, and I appreciate it a lot. Unfortunately in my current circumstances I can't buy a plant, as I am abroad and not in my home. When I return I will do so. I like how you look at life - always being able to start again.

Keep me posted through email.

Re: I Need Help

#58

Post by stevenameyer »

turnwhere wrote: post #44
stevenameyer wrote: post #15

I am by no means an expert but here's my two cents in the hopes that it helps: 1) Stop invalidating how you feel. Just because you feel like other people have it harder then you doesn't mean that you're not allowed to feel sad or down. Personally I find one of the most demoralizing things is feeling like your emotions are invalid, and feeling guilty for feeling bad only makes things worse. It may not seem obvious but…

Thank you for the advice. Point 1 is so difficult. In fact it's why I don't tell anyone how I feel anymore (in real life, not the internet). It's so easy for someone to say yea but what about that kid in Africa who doesn't even have enough water for today. I don't know what to say to that. I am trying 3 right now. It does help to get you through the day, that is for sure. On point 4, my opinion is so weak and changea…

At the same time though I'm sure there are people who are a lot better off then you who still have rough times and feel down. The truth is that everyone has those times, and just because your not in the worst situation (you can always find someone in a worse situation) doesn't mean that it's not ok to feel how you feel.

As far as finding what you want it is a difficult question to answer. A lot of people struggle with it. My suggestion would be try a lot of new things that you think you may be interested in. Take some time to be a little selfish and figure out things about yourself you may not have know. It can be really easy to lose sight of who you are as a person when there is so much going around us so sometimes we just need to take some time and focus on us.

Re: I Need Help

#59

Post by Nightrider »

turnwhere wrote: post #45
Nightrider wrote: post #38

My advice: keep your apartment. Don't do anything drastic until you get a better grip on things. Also ask yourself if you are doing the basics of staying mentally healthy: exercise, socializing, novelty. Get back to what you love. Find out where your interests are. Try this, it worked for me: http://zerotosuperhero.com/mindhack/find-your-lifes-last-kno... Asking for help was smart IMO. Good for you.

I'm checking out the link right now. Thank you.

Also, if you want to talk via Skype, email me.

Re: I Need Help

#60

Post by energetic »

Accidently I've red your cry for help.Maybe I've an option! You ever have tried feetreflexion therapie? Sinds 17years I'm that kind of therapist.Please answer me and I'll be happy to explain you more about the principle from this treatment . I really hoop you wil react . (siannaia@gmail.com Kindest greetings Sianna
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