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How I Beat Depression

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101–110 of 152 posts

Re: How I Beat Depression

#101
post #43

What if you're depressed because you're afraid of death? (I wouldn't say I'm depressed -- not in the clinical sense anyway; but I do spend what I imagine is an abnormal amount of time thinking about it because of mother's passing away when I was younger).

What if you're depressed because you're afraid of death? In that case, you shouldn't take any advice from HN unless that advice is to talk to a professional. It's a lot like legal advice, sure people on the internet can talk about the issues, but they're probably wrong and even if they're right it's still unwise to take what they say at face value. The people with the professional capacity to help you can't do it wel…

That only partially makes sense. For comments/suggestions found on HN that have potential side effects, absolutely take them with a grain of salt and consult a professional... i.e. medication, psychedelics, etc.

But for some of the suggestions, the advice is fantastic. Exercise more? Eat healthier foods at regular intervals? Practice positive thinking about the world and your life? Any one of them could help. ALL of them could help. And they can't hurt. Take every piece of "no-strings-attached" advice you can... and then ALSO consult a professional.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#102
post #50

It's impossible to "think yourself" out of depression or "do something good" out of depression, unless it's just a temporary down mood. The way I beat depression is by doing pure mental exercises on focusing on the actual physical areas of the body where depression is felt, without trying to change/fight/eliminate the feeling itself. I came up with this technique during lowest point of my life and was almost shocked…

It sounds like you independently discovered mindfulness meditation. Good for you!

Re: How I Beat Depression

#103
post #47
post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's a little brash to dismiss published evidence as a conspiracy theory. You may think it flawed but then please at least make an intelligent criticism. Who gets to decide what is "feeling sad" with a cause and what is idiopathic "chemical malfunction". Care to offer any references? Objective diagnostics? I included the bit about antidepressants to caution swallowing the prevailing medical model hook line and sinker…

its simple. if my wife doesn't take her medication she spirals down into a deep depression. it doesn't matter if she's at (what everyone would say) the happiest moments of her life, she's going to get depressed. now flip that when she's taking her meds, she is able to handle and snap out of it if things aren't going so well like any other normal person would. She still gets sad and feels bad, but _she gets over it_,…

But just because it's true for your wife doesn't mean it's unequivocally true for everyone else. You can't make that kind of sweeping statement.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#104

Great perspective. Question for the HN community: Why/How is it that small communities like HN have removed the stigma attached with mental health while larger society has not?

There's a lot less stigma attached when it's a (relatively) anonymous forum, when you're not face-to-face with the people responding, when you have a large support group because people who understand and care find YOU (via your headline) rather than you having to find them, and when someone who responds in a negative way is likely to get downvoted and called an asshole.

There are probably still people on HN who respond negatively to an admission of depression, but they're (wisely) keeping quiet.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#105

Great perspective. Question for the HN community: Why/How is it that small communities like HN have removed the stigma attached with mental health while larger society has not?

> Why/How is it that small communities like HN have removed the stigma attached with mental health

They haven't - there's still stigma around MH problems. It just doesn't show itself in threads like this.

See any thread about i) interviewing or ii) spree shooting and there'll be plenty of stigmatising comments.

It's not so bad, because at least most people on HN are happy to talk about it.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#106

I don't think one can actually beat depression but instead only really cope with the symptoms. I know that sounds awful and kind of defeatist (and I could be wrong) but I think the idea that you can actually conquer this disease sets you up for failure. I first noticed my own depression when I was just a 13 year old kid and first sought help just before the end of high school. I've been through the entire range of em…

> I think the idea that you can actually conquer this disease sets you up for failure.

This idea needs to be heard. Depression quickly feeds on itself, making one hopeless about the inability to fight back against hopelessness. When I learned to accept that the depression was (temporarily) going to win, and that it was its own cause rather than something about myself or my life, I discovered I could just ride it out.

As with quicksand, it's the struggling that pulls you down deeper.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#107
Stay open and allow others to help. Realize you need people around you to who can be a support network. This is the hardest thing to do when you are suffering from depression.

Couldn't agree more. When I was suffering from depression, I was so stubborn about wanting to face it alone and not "force" my friends and family to get involved, because I'd be becoming even more of a burden to them and to society than I already felt I was. I just felt this burning sense of shame and worthlessness at the mere thought of asking for help.

Hackers are admired more than ever, but I think it comes with a price. When everyone sees you as this superman who can make and do anything and knows everything, it's gotta make it that much harder to reach out for help.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#108
post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"but for me believing that I've beaten it is dangerous". Is it really that dangerous? Does 'beating' it mean you forget how to cope? I don't know your situation, but I would strongly advise contemplating the truth that lies behind self-fulfilling prophecies. As Confucius put it “He who who says he can and he who says he can’t are both usually right”. I'm not trying to condense the issue into a soundbite, but rather i…

Short answer: yes. Long answer, think of it like an addict. They always called themselves 'recovering' because they know it only takes a single slip to set you back. Same with Depression. You can be fine for years, become lax in your coping mechanisms and handlers and something small happens that sets off a chain reaction where you are reaching for things you wouldn't normally reach for. One innocent comments or look…

Thank you for your feedback adeaver.

I do understand the addict analogy, but in both cases I'd say the solution was the same... perhaps the issue is ongoing because the root cause of the problem is still there?

The triggers that set people off into addiction/depression are what separate those that are susceptible to those behaviours to those that are resilient to them. What are those triggers? What links them? What actions can be taken to reduce or remove their potency (taking the time to remember you always have choices to delay a reaction may help here)? These might be questions to explore with assistance from others.

Of course it's fantastic to have greater control over the symptoms of addiction or depression, and I in no way wish to diminish that achievement, I've worked on breaking a few (admittedly mild) addictions before and so do have a little understanding of the processes that addicts go through. So I hope you appreciate that I see 'recovering' as a great achievement.

Perhaps the 'beat' word sounds too absolute, too final... I personally would not say 'beating depression' means you have reached a perfect state of happiness, but rather that the triggers that held your recovery back no longer hold you back, so you are free to get better. Perfect is the enemy of the good, be happy that you are doing good. :-)

Re: How I Beat Depression

#109

Great perspective. Question for the HN community: Why/How is it that small communities like HN have removed the stigma attached with mental health while larger society has not?

There's a lot less stigma attached when it's a (relatively) anonymous forum, when you're not face-to-face with the people responding, when you have a large support group because people who understand and care find YOU (via your headline) rather than you having to find them, and when someone who responds in a negative way is likely to get downvoted and called an asshole. There are probably still people on HN who respo…

I've never considered my username here to be particularly anonymous. Apparently it is, as I just discovered, but anyone who knows me would recognize my username.

To be honest, the number of people who are open about mental health problems in posts like this is fairly surprising to me.

Re: How I Beat Depression

#110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm sorry to hear about your predicament pawnhearts. Have you managed to get to a counsellor yet?

Not yet, ZenoArrow. I'm "fear of fear", and I can't be strong enough to face up regular life situations. And I have to find a solution, I have to find the strenght to do something before summer comes. Hot wheter increases depression. At the moment I'm trying to work less and study/read/distract more. I spend great time on the road by car on my own or with my girlfriend, going nowhere and listening to some music I use…

I'm sorry to hear you have had tough times recently pawnhearts.

I understand that the road to recovery might feel hard to find, but you'll maximise your chances of finding it if you can get help from others. Please contact a counsellor. Reaching out for help is a humbling but often vital part of emotional recovery. If you can please do it today or tomorrow.

One piece of advice I can give you now is that looking back at who you were and trying to recreate that isn't likely to be helpful to you. Instead, consider what you can do now to help improve things in the future. If you're not sure where to start (apart from contacting a counsellor as discussed), can always start with improving your diet, finding time to exercise and getting into good habits with your sleep pattern. It's surprising how much our mood is influenced by these things, and they are simple tasks to focus on.

Best of luck with your recovery. :-)

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