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I can relate to this. As I spend time withdrawn from society (including cybercultures like reddit), my views distance from everyone else's, and it becomes harder to relate to people.
I appreciate Hacker News because people here tend to be unusually receptive to independent thought.
TL;DR: Abuse survivor gets depressed, has untreated foot wounds, descends into his own echo chamber, navel gazes for fifteen pages.
It's sad that when your problems are genuinely different from other people's problems, people won't believe you . They will keep giving you advice that worked for them.
"Me and 'X' have been talking and we think you should do 'Y'"
Great, now I have groups of people talking about me.
TL;DR: Abuse survivor gets depressed, has untreated foot wounds, descends into his own echo chamber, navel gazes for fifteen pages.
This kind of abusive behavior is the root of many suicidal (and homicidal) tragedies.
It's sad that when your problems are genuinely different from other people's problems, people won't believe you . They will keep giving you advice that worked for them.
Of course poor Aunt Sharon doesn't understand. And no, the onus isn't on you to make her understand. Unless you want her to...in which case, it may take some effort on your part to frame your emotions to her experience.
Even then you may only meet part way. Which you'll have to accept, but not as a failure.
Just my $0.02.
TL;DR: Abuse survivor gets depressed, has untreated foot wounds, descends into his own echo chamber, navel gazes for fifteen pages.
Normally I wouldn't detract from someone's opinion of something I wrote by responding to summaries. I believe people should be allowed to judge for themselves whether opinions are accurate and when authors jump in defensively it's a slipper slope to derailing the conversation. However, your summary is factually misleading. You imply I was physically abused which I was not. Hopefully my article doesn't give that impre…
Find professional help (NOW) to starting approaching it and dealing with it.
Find professional help (NOW) to help manage your mental disorder (depression) which carries an enormous and present risk of self-harm.
Get whatever the fuck is wrong with your foot fixed, and start walking out the door on the regular.
You appear to be bright, talented, and a capable writer. Resume applying those gifts to the people around you instead of yourself. You are the best person in your own life, now be the best person in other people's lives.
Interesting read, though I just have one minor complaint about your style of writing... Foot notes after every 3-5 paragraphs is somewhat jarring and hampers the flow of reading your story. I suggest moving all of the foot notes to the bottom of the post and let the reader read them if they want to. Just my $0.02.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welcome_to_the_N.H.K. You're probably familiar with this animated series.
One thing that helped me a lot was doing some Vipassana meditation. Acknowledging that everything as an end. All the pleasures, all the pain. If you wait long enough you'll fell better.
Other important point is Nutrition. It makes a WHOLE LOT of difference on your mental habits. And after some time it will make you a new person.
I suggest you watch the movies "Food Matters" and "Fork over Knives". They're great movies (with some flaws) that can be a kind of "wake up call".
As someone that was on the same boat I wish you all the peace and happiness in the world.
It's sad that when your problems are genuinely different from other people's problems, people won't believe you . They will keep giving you advice that worked for them.
I think it's more sad to expect others to divine the solution to your problems when they have no point of reference; I think it's sad when expressions of love and concern are rebuffed with a dismissive, "But you don't understand ." Of course poor Aunt Sharon doesn't understand. And no, the onus isn't on you to make her understand. Unless you want her to...in which case, it may take some effort on your part to frame y…
I didn't get any sense that the author was expecting others to divine the solution to his problems; I think he was just irritated because they were besieging him with "concern" without actually helping any.
I think it's sad when expressions of love and concern are rebuffed with a dismissive, "But you don't understand."
An expression of love and concern like "Hey, it seems like you're going through a rough time, I hope things work out for you, let me know if there's anything I can do to help" is one thing. That should be met with thanks, yes.
An "expression of love and concern" like "I think you should do X" or "Have you tried Y?" is quite another. It is not really aimed at helping or comforting the person who is having a rough time; it is aimed at easing the emotions of the person who thinks they are being comforting. That is the sort of thing that might (and should) get met with "But you don't understand".
Of course poor Aunt Sharon doesn't understand.
Indeed. And therefore she should not presume to tell the person she doesn't understand how they should "fix" things. The issue isn't really that she doesn't understand; it's that she doesn't even know that she doesn't understand.
it may take some effort on your part to frame your emotions to her experience.
This is true, but Aunt Sharon has to be willing to meet you halfway. Many Aunt Sharons are not.