Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone • Hacker News Board

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#81

Post by davidwparker » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:21 PM UTC

I'm surprised that no one has mentioned traveling with your significant other / spouse / girlfriend / wife / boyfriend / husband.

I've made quite a few trips and it's generally not hard to plan something together with my wife, so long as we do it early enough so she can get off work.

She loves eating out, so it's never hard to ask her to eat out with me.

In general, she'll do most things with me, so long as they're not hardcore physical activities (mountain climbing, long distance runs, etc)- but even those she'll go watch if she's able.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#82

Post by rwhitman » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:21 PM UTC

This happened to me the exact same way. Couldn't get anyone on board so I bought a plane ticket to Hong Kong by myself randomly one night and it was one of the best trips I've ever taken. I've done a few other solo trips since.

I think the thing I like the most is the sense of ultimate freedom - no arguments or drama, disasters out of your control etc. Everything you do is because you chose to do it. If you make a mistake and screw something up, nobody is going to complain. After being in a relationship for 7 years I really long to get those moments back...

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#83

Post by gdulli » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:23 PM UTC

solox3 wrote: post #6

Travelling? Two is always better than one. If you break a leg in Thailand, someone can help you to the hospital. If you have a friend who lives in Korea, he can be your Seoul mate. Going on a roller coaster? You can sit beside someone you know. Ordered some weird food that you don't like? Just swap with the friend next to you. Two is better than one.

"always"

I often wonder what kind of mindset it takes in order to so easily and naturally conflate personal values with objective truth.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#84

Post by adcoelho » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:24 PM UTC

run4yourlives wrote: post #70

adcoelho wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've tried this approach and it works but there are situations when one can't go alone. In my case I like to play football(soccer, if you will) and it requires a minimum of 10 to play, it's extremely stressful when we get the people, book the field and when we arrive there we are always short by one.

Join a league. Life's too short to fart around with trying to find those extra few people. If you join a league, not only will you get your match fixes on a more regular basis, you'll have a broader pool to select from if you do try and set up something ad-hoc.

Well yeah I did try that and I played in a couple in the past but the main problem with that solution is the stress involved. Its totally different when you are playing with friends just for the sake of it, when someone plays a little rougher everything's alright quickly afterwards. In a league, and I strongly believe this is a cultural thing, people tend to lose Lots of time complaining and I end up enjoying it much less.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#85

Post by swah » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:28 PM UTC

ghc wrote: post #13

I don't know about anyone else, but I feel extremely awkward going to nice restaurants alone even if I bring something to do. I don't experience this feeling anywhere else...just restaurants. I think I'd be more likely to travel alone than to go out to a nice restaurant down the street alone.

Me too. And there are some where I'd really like to eat more often. I don't mind going to the movies alone, though.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#86

Post by scarmig » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:31 PM UTC

kordless wrote: post #9

solox3 wrote: post #6

Travelling? Two is always better than one. If you break a leg in Thailand, someone can help you to the hospital. If you have a friend who lives in Korea, he can be your Seoul mate. Going on a roller coaster? You can sit beside someone you know. Ordered some weird food that you don't like? Just swap with the friend next to you. Two is better than one.

I was just in Thailand for Christmas. I can tell you definitively people there will help you in a heartbeat if you get hurt. Alone or not. The Thais are absolutely wonderful people.

I'm sure the Thais are absolutely wonderful, but do you really think that in the USA or France or Egypt people would just let you lay on the ground in pain with a broken leg?

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#87

Post by fourmii » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:32 PM UTC

solox3 wrote: post #6

Travelling? Two is always better than one. If you break a leg in Thailand, someone can help you to the hospital. If you have a friend who lives in Korea, he can be your Seoul mate. Going on a roller coaster? You can sit beside someone you know. Ordered some weird food that you don't like? Just swap with the friend next to you. Two is better than one.

I disagree. I travelled with one of my best mates driving through the States. He ran out of money half way and went home. While it was fun with him, it was really no different to being at home, we'd do the same things, except in a different country.

It wasn't until he left that I actually started meeting tons of other travelers. I've met many who are still friends many years on, albeit all around the world. I got to share experiences with new people and saw things through different eyes and cultures.

I think travelling on your own teaches a lot about yourself, and it drags you out of your comfort zone. No one wants to be that lonely guy behind a book at the hostel bar...

As for travelling in Thailand alone, I did that, and met some of the most fun people on my trip. The thing is, a place like Thailand is no longer a strange and distant place, it's full of travelers and backpackers doing the same thing you are. And there are few things cooler than traveler's karma, get a favor and then return one to someone else...

Doing things yourself isn't as lonely as it makes out to be...

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#88

Post by mberning » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:35 PM UTC

This breaks down when it comes time to make reservations and other arrangements where money becomes involved. I've found that asking for a deposit on things like lodging and tickets really weeds out who is serious and who is not.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#89

Post by malenm » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:35 PM UTC

bluekite2000 wrote: post #76

This boils down to your personality, not on external factors like who you are with, where you go or what you do. Are you an extrovert, introvert or ambivert? Figure out who you are then everything will make sense

Thanks for this - I'm very much an ambivert but never heard the term until today.

Re: Fuck it, I'll Do This Alone

#90

Post by user911302966 » Fri, Jan 25, 2013, 5:36 PM UTC

DigitalTurk wrote: post #36

As a rule, I prefer traveling on my own. That way I can take my time to walk wherever I want and get a better 'feel' for the city. For instance, I love to go out into the city without a map sometimes. I often even go out of my way to eat in cheap, dirty places because I want to know what the locals eat. Sometimes I even go out of my way to explore the boring and the ugly parts of town. It's difficult to find travel p…

Yes, DigitalTurk, locals everywhere seek out the "cheap, dirty places" to eat. This attitude reeks of pretention and adolescence.