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Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

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Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#111
post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I got labeled "smart but lazy" at a pretty young age (high test scores, didn't do any homework), and I let that label stick with me for far too long. I took some pride in how I could get the top score in a class without studying, and didn't realize that studying itself was a useful skill. I let this whole mindset drag me down through undergrad (especially once I hit the point where I really ought to have studied), an…

Sometimes accountability is not enough. Medication and therapy might help, as it can be the case with ADHD. Many people with it fit the pattern of “smart but lazy”

In education these kids are termed “twice-exceptional” because they test as gifted but have some kind of disability that makes some things challenging.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#112
post #63

I will speak from my experience. When I was younger, I considered myself very smart, and I was pretty unhappy. As I grew, I met people much smarter than me; I stopped seeing myself as "the smart" one, and now I am pretty happy. It's not that I became happier because I became less smart; I became happier when I stopped thinking my value was based on my intelligence, so I stopped trying to be recognized by my intellect…

I got labeled "smart but lazy" at a pretty young age (high test scores, didn't do any homework), and I let that label stick with me for far too long. I took some pride in how I could get the top score in a class without studying, and didn't realize that studying itself was a useful skill. I let this whole mindset drag me down through undergrad (especially once I hit the point where I really ought to have studied), an…

Yeah similar here. By the time I needed to really study (3rd year of undergrad) I faced the hard reality that I had never developed the necessary habits.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#113

I do think an important part that we leave out when we analyze datapoints like "people who test well in one subject tend to test well in other subjects" is that "test taking" is itself a skill that people can be good or bad at. I was always an expert test taker from a very young age. I loved standardized tests, and excelled every time. I remember thinking many times how I was pretty sure I could do pretty well on a t…

There may be such a thing as pure test-taking skill, but I think it boils down to two things: General knowledge/literacy, and knowing the specific format of the test. A well-written test should not have question context for one thing that informs the answer to another question, or have logical inconsistencies/redundancies/ambiguity that can be exploited. Questions should also not build off of each other in a way that causes cascading failure if you can't answer one. These things may happen in low-stakes classroom exams but they certainly shouldn't in a standardized test.

Practically everyone goes to school in our society, so they have very similar opportunity to learn how to take a test. Some of them never get good at it after many years. Maybe that is a sign that they also wouldn't be good at any academic subjects. You wouldn't have a reliable way to measure that, because test-taking is out. I guess they could try to practice test-taking by taking a ton of random tests and grading themselves, but then they might accidentally become experts in some subjects!

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#114
post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sometimes accountability is not enough. Medication and therapy might help, as it can be the case with ADHD. Many people with it fit the pattern of “smart but lazy”

In education these kids are termed “twice-exceptional” because they test as gifted but have some kind of disability that makes some things challenging.

Yeah, I was labeled twice-exceptional and medicated for it, but there was also this general thing where I felt like I was special for not needing to study and that it was something to take pride in, which I don't think is inherent to ADHD. I have some friends who also have ADHD and are decently smart, but they have always taken pride in being hard workers, and have come out much more academically successful than I did.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#115
post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I stopped viewing all news media companies five years ago. Real news will get to you pretty quickly by other means such as HN which I still frequent a couple of hours a week. Modern news is re-hashing even the trivial in the worst possible way and inviting the extreme idiots on both sides to fight it out in the comment section, I can honestly say I am missing nothing and still find myself informed and happier.

Same, I've learned if something is important enough I'll hear about it anyway

The news is virtually never important enough. And my definition of “important enough” is “actionable”.

There’s a pervasive idea, mostly among more educated people, that keeping up with political news is civic minded and responsible. I’m not sure if I’m just cynical or small minded but I just don’t see the point. Getting a daily blast of topics to worry about that I have no control over doesn’t seem like a good use of this life journey.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#116
post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I stopped viewing all news media companies five years ago. Real news will get to you pretty quickly by other means such as HN which I still frequent a couple of hours a week. Modern news is re-hashing even the trivial in the worst possible way and inviting the extreme idiots on both sides to fight it out in the comment section, I can honestly say I am missing nothing and still find myself informed and happier.

It is hard to abstain from news completely. The mainstream media is becoming increasingly like social media, feeding on shared sentiment and vague feelings of outrage.

If you watch the news, you'd think the sky is falling.

TOOL - Vicarious

"Eye on the TV, 'cause tragedy thrills me

Whatever flavor it happens to be like

Killed by the husband, drowned by the ocean

Shot by his own son, she used the poison in his tea

Then kissed him goodbye, that's my kind of story

It's no fun 'til someone dies

Don't look at me like I am a monster

Frown out your one face, but with the other

Stare like a junkie into the TV

Stare like a zombie while the mother holds her child

Watches him die, hands to the sky, crying

"Why, oh, why?"

'Cause I need to watch things die

From a distance

Vicariously, I live while the whole world dies"

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#117
post #104

I’m interested in a different question: are powerful people happier? Any references?

Can happiness even be measured? Do we have a unit for happiness? I think that's a big "no" to both questions, so the entire topic is a bit strange. Might as well ask which type of people are luckier.

I feel like happiness is not an absolute nor permanent state. It's ephemeral and relative. You go to a deli shop and your favorite sandwich maker makes your meatball sub just the way you like it. You eat that sub and relish every bite. You're happy and ... reasonably happy .... like Huell. Then later at night you get dumped by your g/f. Now you're sad and you experienced both on the same day.

I think the same way about sadness and depression. Not an absolute nor permanent state. You have your moments when you are sad and/or depressed and then you bounce back.

I think most people normally experience all these emotions on a cyclical basis.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#118
post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I got labeled "smart but lazy" at a pretty young age (high test scores, didn't do any homework), and I let that label stick with me for far too long. I took some pride in how I could get the top score in a class without studying, and didn't realize that studying itself was a useful skill. I let this whole mindset drag me down through undergrad (especially once I hit the point where I really ought to have studied), an…

Sometimes accountability is not enough. Medication and therapy might help, as it can be the case with ADHD. Many people with it fit the pattern of “smart but lazy”

I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 7 and took medication for it until 9th grade when I went off it because I didn't like how it made me feel, and I have really disliked it when I've been back on it as an adult. Strattera was better, though now I'm on Wellbutrin instead. I did a lot of therapy over the years, and never found it helpful, though I never did it with an organization focused coach.

I do think a lot of it was the attitude I took towards school. I know a lot of other people with ADHD who were less arrogant and approached school in a better way because of that.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#119

Im not smart (maybe average), but a lot of my unhappiness starts from just having access to information. And then more I process the information, the more unhappy I become. Smarter people than me probably have more information and are able to process it faster, uncovering effects that are not readily perceived by normal folks like myself.

pretty sure if you're commenting on here then you're way above average. It's not a compliment, its just that you're misunderstanding how low the bar is.

That seems like some gatekeeping egoistical hi-ground.

I refuse to believe the average person here is any more intelligent than the average person on the street.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#120
My observation is that people who are smart (or think they are) tend to express themselves via trying to be overly correct - on everything. And that gets exhausting.

People who try to be too precise and accurate, pay it with their happiness and peace. There is no better therapy than bullshitting with friends, just rolling with it instead of trying to make it all 100% perfectly accurate.

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