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Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

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Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#41

Post by iyulaev »

larsberg wrote: post #28

> Your first job out of college won’t make you or break you I disagree with this statement. Certainly, if you go to Google/Facebook/Microsoft/Apple, the choice doesn't matter and you can do whatever after you've learned how to work on real software. But getting into games and many other fields can be astoundingly difficult even two years out of college, as it's difficult to overcome the "finance," "healthcare," or "c…

Brand yourself as a generalist. It helps if you work for a company that does a whole gamut (from hardware to GUI-level software). Also do side projects in a totally different area from your work. I was (am?) a hw engineer but had no trouble selling myself as a software guy by emphasizing the software work I've done and my side projects. If you still remeber algos and datastructures you can blast through the interview once you get your foot in the door.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#42

Post by stretchwithme »

pavel_lishin wrote: post #7
Shenglong wrote: post #3

Keep those hobbies going. Keep playing soccer, or pool, or surfing. Keep doing yoga. Keep reading. Keep doing you. You’ll develop some great friends around those interests. One of my most resounding fears is meeting people in different fields. In school, it's easy. I can go to a party, go out to a club with friends, or just sit down at a library table with a stranger and meet someone new. Out of school, it seems thos…

I haven't graduated recently, but I moved from Texas to New York City three years ago, and I've met most of my current friends through Reddit meetups and IRC channel. There are general weekly meetups in a bar, and other meetups catering to more specific interests - rock climbing, board games, programming, etc. Reddit itself may get some (well deserved) flack on HN, but it's just a community made up of people, and you…

Meetups are a great way to meet people.

And if you can't find one that interests you, start one yourself. You have to pay but you get to pick the location, making it most convenient for you. You actually come out ahead. And most people really appreciate that you made the effort.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#43

Post by prophetjohn »

stretchwithme wrote: post #40
prophetjohn wrote: post #32

I just graduated last night, but this doesn't feel terribly enlightening to me. I don't know if I didn't have the typical college experience or if people like the author just tend to be more vocal about their experience because those in my position had a less rosy view of the whole thing. But it's obvious that I'm in a different group when I read stuff like > There’s no more Spring break or three months off for summe…

It may take more than a day for all to be revealed.

I sure hope so! I didn't mean to imply that I have it all figured out. But I have to wonder how much a post-college transition article applies to me when written from the perspective of a "traditional" college student. Or at least the type who was a student and only a student when in college since a lot of the transition difficulties are centered around having to work every day and so on.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#44

Post by stretchwithme »

aes256 wrote: post #33
objclxt wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> "Don't have a girlfriend at all, this is a time for lots and lots of friends" You seem to be suggesting the two are incompatible, but in my experience that's not really the case at all...

Of course being in a relationship and having other friends are not incompatible, but the time commitment, reordering of priorities, strain on your mental/physical/pecuniary resources will almost inevitably harm your relationships with other friends. Not to mention being in a relationship with someone can lead to profound changes in a person's character, and those changes may not gel with existing friends...

For some it works that way, but others find a partner helps them entertain and communicate. Even sending out the Christmas cards is a lot more likely.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#45

Post by scarecrowbob »

prophetjohn wrote: post #32

I just graduated last night, but this doesn't feel terribly enlightening to me. I don't know if I didn't have the typical college experience or if people like the author just tend to be more vocal about their experience because those in my position had a less rosy view of the whole thing. But it's obvious that I'm in a different group when I read stuff like > There’s no more Spring break or three months off for summe…

This resonates loudly with me-- I'm almost 35 and have been out of the university 5 years now.

On one hand, my wife paid her way though school and had a very similar experience of working FT (or several part-time) jobs).

It's only been since she graduated several years ago that (as a violin teacher) she's been able to schedule time into her life for things like vacations and the like.

On the other hand, I spent 10 years in the university, switching from CS to philosophy, getting an MA in English, and leaving a PhD in Literature after a couple of chapters in my dissertation. In that process there is a tremendous pressure to be constantly working on your project, and I simply don't have that now that I have been doing freelance web development.

Much as with my wife, the certainty of being able to find however much work I need has really allowed me to throttle back on feeling guilty when I'm not pushing forward on some project or other (or, perhaps, just allowed me to feel less guilt on pushing forward on non-remunerative projects like becoming a better musician or learning a new programming technique/technology without a direct short-term payoff).

If I could add anything to the OP, it'd be this: taking a full time job that doesn't mark seasons or develop you into some new person isn't inevitable. IMO, your plan to seize new found free time is much more profitable than giving into the flow of "Wednesday just being Wednesday".

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#46

Post by radarsat1 »

I am currently dealing with this. I'm not sure about his specific tips, but the general feeling that this transition is not easy is something I don't feel I was adequately prepared for. I just finished my PhD and started working at a company, and I thought I would really enjoy the job since it's in a fun and exciting field, but honestly the experience has been pretty jarring. I've spent the last 7 years basically in charge of my own research projects, and all of a sudden being tasked to fix someone else's software that I'd never seen before and that was already at quite an advanced stage was just a bit difficult and a shock to my system. Not that I couldn't handle the work technically (I managed to commit a few pretty important bug fixes in my first week), but socially and mentally it was very difficult for me; suddenly not being around any of the people I have become good friends with, and being tied down to such a strict work schedule. 9-to-5 instead of waking up when I feel like it and taking a long coffee break with my friends in the afternoon. I am sort of starting to get used to it, but it sure hasn't been easy.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#47

Post by ry0ohki »

prophetjohn wrote: post #32

I just graduated last night, but this doesn't feel terribly enlightening to me. I don't know if I didn't have the typical college experience or if people like the author just tend to be more vocal about their experience because those in my position had a less rosy view of the whole thing. But it's obvious that I'm in a different group when I read stuff like > There’s no more Spring break or three months off for summe…

Oddly, I felt like I had much more free time after college. When work ended at 5pm, I suddenly had this huge 7 hour window of time where I had no homework to work on, no projects etc... I started reading for fun, working out, doing side projects, and I still had time!

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#48

Post by usaar333 »

objclxt wrote: post #26
nealabq wrote: post #16

Remember how those first few weeks of college were intensely social. You meet a lot of people you'll know the rest of your life. It's a critical time. I recommend: Social > academic. But they're intertwined, so work hard, and work with others in your core area. Be helpful and smart and humble. Don't worry about your non-core subjects (let others help you). Don't go nuts with freedom. Go to parties, but drink very lit…

> "Don't have a girlfriend at all, this is a time for lots and lots of friends" You seem to be suggesting the two are incompatible, but in my experience that's not really the case at all...

Wait, GP is talking just about the first few weeks of college right?

If so, I can see some truth to this. I can't think of anytime in your life you'll ever again not only have no commitments, but also be surrounded by so many people who haven't yet formed (social) relationships. Makes sense to 100% focus on meeting people and building friendships -- it only gets harder going forward.

Re: Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

#49

Post by csmattryder »

mbesto wrote: post #34
nealabq wrote: post #16

Remember how those first few weeks of college were intensely social. You meet a lot of people you'll know the rest of your life. It's a critical time. I recommend: Social > academic. But they're intertwined, so work hard, and work with others in your core area. Be helpful and smart and humble. Don't worry about your non-core subjects (let others help you). Don't go nuts with freedom. Go to parties, but drink very lit…

Go to parties, but drink very little, avoid drugs, don't get caught up in sex. It's fun, but save it for later. Don't have a girlfriend at all, this is a time for lots and lots of friends. I personally think the opposite. It's your 20s, enjoy it while it lasts.

Totally agree, everything in moderation, though.

I'd rather live with the regret of 'Oh I wish I hadn't done this/that/the other' than being 50 and looking back on my life regretting I didn't enjoy myself more.

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