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You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

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11–20 of 48 posts

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#11
post #9

For people into music: Would you be interested in an app that lists music events in your area, where you can register yourself as going, and where people can apply to go with you? What do you think would work well? What do you think the pitfalls might be?

Yes, I'd be interested.

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#12
post #9

For people into music: Would you be interested in an app that lists music events in your area, where you can register yourself as going, and where people can apply to go with you? What do you think would work well? What do you think the pitfalls might be?

This exists for the electronic music scene, Radiate.

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#13
post #12
post #9

For people into music: Would you be interested in an app that lists music events in your area, where you can register yourself as going, and where people can apply to go with you? What do you think would work well? What do you think the pitfalls might be?

This exists for the electronic music scene, Radiate.

Well, that’s good to know. Thanks.

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#15
post #9

For people into music: Would you be interested in an app that lists music events in your area, where you can register yourself as going, and where people can apply to go with you? What do you think would work well? What do you think the pitfalls might be?

"Lists events in your area" is always the hard part.

The bars in my city don't have public APIs. If you start small and local, you could maybe get buy in from some places, "Send this address an email with event details and I will help you get butts in the door!"

Also if you build any app that lets you meet new people, especially new people with compatible interests, Match Group will buy you out and turn whatever you built into another tinder.

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#18

I have exactly one friend. I had two, but one of them recently passed away suddenly. At 51, I can definitely say it's very hard to meet anyone. I guess I need to start playing D&D or board games or disc golf.

I created (well ... bought the domain) https://clubs.fyi to solve this problem for myself, after I moved to a new city and found myself with no friends for like the 4th time in my life[1]. And yes, the findings in TFA are true. The main catalyzer is something you do regularly with another person. That's it. It could be just sitting next to each other, but weekly. The best thing for this is joining a club, clubs happe…

That's advice to meet activity partners, not friends. Think of your closest friends. Did you set out to meet them by looking for people with their exact interests? Maybe you did and you and your friends are part of a scene, but I'd bet most people did not.

On advice like yours, I started a niche club and ran it for 3 years. When people join your club, they're not there to meet you! They're joining to participate in the club. Now you're in the awkward position of responsibility as the club's host/organizer, with the additional distance between you and the other participants.

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#19

Honestly I have found it easy to make friends as an adult. Just need to go and do activities with other single adults and they are likely open to and have time to be friends beyond the meeting activity in my experience.

Such as?

Re: You're not uncool. Making friends as an adult is just hard (2021)

#20
post #9

For people into music: Would you be interested in an app that lists music events in your area, where you can register yourself as going, and where people can apply to go with you? What do you think would work well? What do you think the pitfalls might be?

I’m interested but then I ask: who pays?

Not cynically. Just, is this a hobby for someone? If so, awesome. In my town we have a WhatsApp org for local musicians that helps with gear exchange, gig promotion, collaboration, etc.

Restaurants and bars and event spaces use a myriad of promotion vehicles. Other local businesses. The paper. Official announcements from the town. Other events. Etc. Same with the groups playing.

The ways to find this stuff aren’t amazing but not so bad that I’m searching for another app on my phone.

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