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Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

ramones.dev

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Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#71

Post by tayo42 »

corytheboyd wrote: post #55
fwlr wrote: post #29

This could be due to ADD, I am still getting tested. Granted, that's a diagnosis, not a root cause. No, it’s a diagnosis of the root cause - in fact, it is plausibly the root cause of everything else described in the post. Inability to complete work, procrastination/distraction by focusing on nearby tasks, the pervasive sense that you struggle with things that other people do not, even the depression (untreated ADD c…

> untreated ADD causing repeated failures, repeated failures causing depression realized this one about myself earlier this year, it really helped to boil it down to something besides “I am just inherently bad at things.” that attitude worked as a dumb single kid, but it was harming my adult life and relationships. therapy helped me get there. I have been on bupropion for about a year, and recently started on methylp…

>quitting my fully vested tech job to fuck off and be a cook

Are you doing entry level line cook work or something?

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#72

Post by dogleash »

voakbasda wrote: post #59
skydhash wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Take any long-running successful project, and you’ll find that they practice an engineering-like discipline to make it sustainable.

And the difference will be as stark as steak is from stew. To be clear, “engineering-like” is not “engineering”.

I worked on projects with EEs and MEs for years. Were they not doing "engineering" because they built custom PCBs and the devices they go inside, rather than drawing the wiring plans or HVAC plans for a construction project? Most of them didn't even have a PE.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#73

Post by corytheboyd »

tayo42 wrote: post #71
corytheboyd wrote: post #55

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> untreated ADD causing repeated failures, repeated failures causing depression realized this one about myself earlier this year, it really helped to boil it down to something besides “I am just inherently bad at things.” that attitude worked as a dumb single kid, but it was harming my adult life and relationships. therapy helped me get there. I have been on bupropion for about a year, and recently started on methylp…

>quitting my fully vested tech job to fuck off and be a cook Are you doing entry level line cook work or something?

yeah, at a local pizza/taproom place. they share tips with cooks, works out to ~$35/hr. I'm not expecting it to replace a tech salary, but it helps offset the savings burn (which was specifically set aside for this). engaging with real people in real life about real things is also an indreeeedibly nice change of pace (even the stressful/tense moments of shit hitting the fan).

I'll re-enter tech later... maybe.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#74

Post by sudosteph »

fwlr wrote: post #29

This could be due to ADD, I am still getting tested. Granted, that's a diagnosis, not a root cause. No, it’s a diagnosis of the root cause - in fact, it is plausibly the root cause of everything else described in the post. Inability to complete work, procrastination/distraction by focusing on nearby tasks, the pervasive sense that you struggle with things that other people do not, even the depression (untreated ADD c…

Atomoxetine's effect size is surprisingly similar to methylphenidate, though in my experience it treats different aspects of ADHD than stimulants. Some doctors (mine) are open to combining it with a long-acting stimulant, which actually can be a really nice setup, especially if you're sensitive to stimulants.

Hope you get it worked out OP. I will say, if it's ADHD, it's 100% worth trying to get the best treatment you can.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#75

Post by dwaltrip »

My story has a lot of similarities to yours…

I got diagnosed with ADHD 2 years ago, at age 35.

It was one of the most important things I’ve ever done.

I strongly encourage you to keep looking into this.

Please be gentle to yourself. You’ve been fighting your whole life with one hand tied behind your back, and no one even knew.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#76

Post by tayo42 »

corytheboyd wrote: post #73
tayo42 wrote: post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>quitting my fully vested tech job to fuck off and be a cook Are you doing entry level line cook work or something?

yeah, at a local pizza/taproom place. they share tips with cooks, works out to ~$35/hr. I'm not expecting it to replace a tech salary, but it helps offset the savings burn (which was specifically set aside for this). engaging with real people in real life about real things is also an indreeeedibly nice change of pace (even the stressful/tense moments of shit hitting the fan). I'll re-enter tech later... maybe.

Oh interesting,that doesn't seem to bad.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#77

Post by mayhemducks »

jvanderbot wrote: post #18
quantummagic wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the point was that there are people who don't need all this extra work, it just comes naturally. And they are more suited to engineering than people who need to spend a lot of energy on emotional and mental regulation as well.

Yes - you are identifying a non-depressed engineer. A depressed engineer can become one of those by removing the depression.

There is no cure for depression. Like there is no cure for diabetes. There is a big difference between having the disease, and feeling sadness brought on by circumstances. There is no such thing as simply "removing the depression".

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#78

Post by mayhemducks »

quantummagic wrote: post #25
jvanderbot wrote: post #18

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes - you are identifying a non-depressed engineer. A depressed engineer can become one of those by removing the depression.

No, the point is that not everyone is cut out to be an engineer. If you find yourself being depressed as an engineer, one possibility is that it's really not the job for you. Not everyone is capable of being an engineer, and being prone to emotional disregulation is probably a good indicator. Not to say you can't muddle through, but the original post was saying that you should at least ask yourself if you'd be happie…

This is ableism.

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#79

Post by dwaltrip »

travelalberta wrote: post #7

Most of y’all need to buck up. If day to day engineering tasks are so challenging for you maybe the anxiety and depression you’re feeling is your system telling you that you are in misalignment. Why are you an engineer if you are struggling to complete the basic tasks? Are you meant to be doing what you are doing?

You need to communicate better. One of the most important steps is to know your audience. This means you need to understand where they are coming from. Without this understanding, your words are unlikely to be correct and useful. To communicate clearly is to think clearly.

If you can’t follow these basics, why are you even writing comments? Are you meant to be using the internet?

Re: Prioritize mental health, and why communication is so important

#80

Post by JTbane »

corytheboyd wrote: post #55
fwlr wrote: post #29

This could be due to ADD, I am still getting tested. Granted, that's a diagnosis, not a root cause. No, it’s a diagnosis of the root cause - in fact, it is plausibly the root cause of everything else described in the post. Inability to complete work, procrastination/distraction by focusing on nearby tasks, the pervasive sense that you struggle with things that other people do not, even the depression (untreated ADD c…

> untreated ADD causing repeated failures, repeated failures causing depression realized this one about myself earlier this year, it really helped to boil it down to something besides “I am just inherently bad at things.” that attitude worked as a dumb single kid, but it was harming my adult life and relationships. therapy helped me get there. I have been on bupropion for about a year, and recently started on methylp…

> quitting my fully vested tech job to fuck off and be a cook for a while

I am also fantasizing about this and am only holding off from doing it because of the social stigma (what idiot would quit a well paid full-time job). My biggest issue with the software industry is the feverish shiny-new-thing syndrome that AI is causing (and my current company is all in on this, with "Hyper-Velocity Engineering" panels). Maybe I don't want to move at light speed and would rather stop and smell the roses.

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