But there were brave souls who tried, in the now-defunct Bulwer-Lytton Contest [0].
Where else could you find gems like these?
> The day I lost my tractor was the same day I found out my wife was moonlighting as a hooker when she gave me a wad of cash and told me, “It’s from a John, dear."
0: https://www.bulwer-lytton.com