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How to ask for help from people who don't know you
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Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#12I've been DM'ing randos on LinkedIn for lightweight consults and found that offering to pay up front and asking strangers to price their own time can help to show seriousness and often results in free interactions or buy-me-a-coffee pricing. e.g. "Hey I love your work on X, I've been thinking about / working on related thing Y and would love your feedback on aspect Z. How much $$ to rent your brain for 20 minutes? I'm mainly wondering what you think/know about specific questions A, B, and C." They can either reply with a price, suggest a time for a short call, or just answer directly
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#13The problem here is that most points are about how to formulate your ask. I think the biggest thing is that you're much more likely to get help if you show you're doing the best to solve it yourself. There's a big difference between: "Hey, I saw this job at [company you work at], could you refer me please? I'm [lists skills and experience]" and "Hey I'm thinking of applying to [company you work at] for the product de…
I agree with this and think the most important part here is less about you actually solving any specific problem and more about your prospect as a possible value add instead of just another task on your TODO list
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#14This was an excellently written, salient post with some good tidbits.
I've learned some of these lessons the hard way. I'll add a few. Proof of work is important, but it's not about the magnitude of energy you spend. I went through two iterations of reaching out to my college network. The first time I put so much time into handwriting notes and trying to provide my relatable background. 100 notes, not a single response.
The second time I sent emails that were a few sentences. I had a much clearer ask and devoted the effort into fitting my questions into the email. I wanted a conversation really, but I also tried to communicate what I planned to ask.
15% response rate and invaluable conversations. Less overall "work".
Secondly, and relatedly, don't ever waste someone's time. Don't ask for / accept a meeting if you don't have some semblance of a clear ask. It's hard, especially in early stage business where you're trying to discover what you don't know. But you can try to lay out your tier 1 "here's what I think", "here are the follow ups".
I sensed once that I had irritated someone by lacking the agenda. Another time I took a mutual connection up on an intro where I didn't know what I really needed. I regret both of these.
Thirdly try to pay it forward. It won't always come back around, but you can feel more comfortable asking for help and more cognizant of what a helper (so to speak) is thinking
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#15The problem here is that most points are about how to formulate your ask. I think the biggest thing is that you're much more likely to get help if you show you're doing the best to solve it yourself. There's a big difference between: "Hey, I saw this job at [company you work at], could you refer me please? I'm [lists skills and experience]" and "Hey I'm thinking of applying to [company you work at] for the product de…
I think that was the gist of the first point: “show you’re a serious person”
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#16For technical requests, one of the most effective ways to demonstrate that you are serious is to cite something about the person's published work that is relevant to the request. There is no more effective way to get someone's attention than showing that you have read and appreciated something they've written.
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#17The problem here is that most points are about how to formulate your ask. I think the biggest thing is that you're much more likely to get help if you show you're doing the best to solve it yourself. There's a big difference between: "Hey, I saw this job at [company you work at], could you refer me please? I'm [lists skills and experience]" and "Hey I'm thinking of applying to [company you work at] for the product de…
"Help me help you" stands.
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#18I've been DM'ing randos on LinkedIn for lightweight consults and found that offering to pay up front and asking strangers to price their own time can help to show seriousness and often results in free interactions or buy-me-a-coffee pricing. e.g. "Hey I love your work on X, I've been thinking about / working on related thing Y and would love your feedback on aspect Z. How much $$ to rent your brain for 20 minutes? I'…
Maybe that's linkedin people. There are others like me: there is no such thing as 20 minutes. If I take on something, it's at least 10 hours effective. So we would just flat out refuse any such offer while on the other hand you can get those hours free if the question is sufficiently interesting.
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#19There is plenty advice around for "how to ask" (really, it's the same if you know the person or not). It all boils down to a Calvinistic "show you're worthy" kind of exercise.
But what about advice for giving help to someone?
There's plenty of ways that giving someone help can go horribly wrong, and I think that it's not uncommon for people to be blindsided by such a request.
Re: How to ask for help from people who don't know you
#20The problem here is that most points are about how to formulate your ask. I think the biggest thing is that you're much more likely to get help if you show you're doing the best to solve it yourself. There's a big difference between: "Hey, I saw this job at [company you work at], could you refer me please? I'm [lists skills and experience]" and "Hey I'm thinking of applying to [company you work at] for the product de…
"Help me help you" stands.
I don't think it's just that, I also think it's "be someone I want to help"