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The truth about being a manager

sofiakodar.github.io

51–60 of 69 posts

Re: The truth about being a manager

#51
post #42
post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It confirmed that management would be a bad choice for me. If anything I think that the article is going to give people the ability to say "no" if they are on the fence. I don't want to sell. I don't want to politic. I don't want to know about re-orgs before the employees whom it actually affects. I don't want to lay off someone because my team's profits are being siphoned by others. I don't want to carry upper manag…

Those are definitely the down sides. As a manager who has had to let people go, no matter how deserved, it is a part of the job that I wish I didn't have to do, and it does disturb my sleep and peace. But there are some very meaningful upsides as well, and the one that rises above all the rest is that I genuinely love working with teams and helping them grow. Based on your list of things you don't want to do, I would…

Genuine question:

If it was actually deserved, why does it bother you?

Re: The truth about being a manager

#52
This is a lot of asshole puckering over nothing. Is this post really about doing your job, or about protecting your ego? Posturing and a defensive attitude will never be respected by anyone. People just want to trust you to deliver results. They don't care about the rest of you.

There are so many meaningless phrases and words used like "part of the team" and "dumb", "lazy", "tough". There are no examples given of these things. An uncritical reader might let their imagination run wild catastrophizing. Nobody in a leadership role should even have a mind for such quick and empty characterizations. Most of the job is continuous assessment after all.

All that really matters is that you understand the business and the work of the people you're managing. Be flexible with your time and assume good faith in discussions. You're not going to know what you're lacking until you're already in the role.

Mike Tyson quote: "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth"

Re: The truth about being a manager

#53
post #42
post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It confirmed that management would be a bad choice for me. If anything I think that the article is going to give people the ability to say "no" if they are on the fence. I don't want to sell. I don't want to politic. I don't want to know about re-orgs before the employees whom it actually affects. I don't want to lay off someone because my team's profits are being siphoned by others. I don't want to carry upper manag…

Those are definitely the down sides. As a manager who has had to let people go, no matter how deserved, it is a part of the job that I wish I didn't have to do, and it does disturb my sleep and peace. But there are some very meaningful upsides as well, and the one that rises above all the rest is that I genuinely love working with teams and helping them grow. Based on your list of things you don't want to do, I would…

I've seen people fired that produced 10x+ their salary in value. That certainly isn't desirable, nor is it necessary. In one case it was because a flailing upper manager was trying to find a scapegoat. I don't see ethical people get promoted to upper management. In fact, they seem to weed those people out on purpose.

Re: The truth about being a manager

#54
post #18

Looks like either you are missing the whole point of being a manager or you are selling it for sympathy. Either way it is not all that bad as you paint it. Otherwise why would lot of people dream of being promoted to a manager? You need to have the taste to enjoy your role. Managers have the power. They are "inside" people for the company while everyone below that level are just workers. Managers are in the loop for…

> They can put people in roles, reward those you like, punish those you don't like. Who don't enjoy that?

Those of us without Machiavellian tendencies?

Re: The truth about being a manager

#56
post #51
post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Those are definitely the down sides. As a manager who has had to let people go, no matter how deserved, it is a part of the job that I wish I didn't have to do, and it does disturb my sleep and peace. But there are some very meaningful upsides as well, and the one that rises above all the rest is that I genuinely love working with teams and helping them grow. Based on your list of things you don't want to do, I would…

Genuine question: If it was actually deserved, why does it bother you?

Here's a concrete example. I hired somebody who was really impressive during the interview process, but then soon realized they just didn't have the right skills for the role. He wasn't a bad person. Had a family, and I knew it would be a big disruption for them to have to go through job searching again.

Another case. A guy I managed caused a lot of friction with one particular co-worker, and it came to a head when he he stepped way over the line and veered into personal attacks on a call. Had to let him go, and I was angry with him at the time, but it still pained me to do it and was on my mind for quite some time.

Re: The truth about being a manager

#57
post #56
post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Genuine question: If it was actually deserved, why does it bother you?

Here's a concrete example. I hired somebody who was really impressive during the interview process, but then soon realized they just didn't have the right skills for the role. He wasn't a bad person. Had a family, and I knew it would be a big disruption for them to have to go through job searching again. Another case. A guy I managed caused a lot of friction with one particular co-worker, and it came to a head when h…

I agree those are two common scenarios where it would be painful. Those two people were not good fits for their roles, so hopefully they found something more appropriate.

Re: The truth about being a manager

#58
> You will encounter business decisions you think are terrible but you still have to sell to your team. You cannot vent your frustration to the people you lead.

I actually disagree with this point a lot, as an IC. My manager shares his honest opinions with us, and I respect him more for it. It seems like the rest of the team feels the same.

I’ve had managers try to sell as something good for the team, and it sucks. It feels like being gaslit. I think honest, open communication is a much better way to run a team. We’re all adults and professionals too; we can handle the truth.

Re: The truth about being a manager

#59
This is an fantastic article (atleast for me as a swede). Most of it can be true depending on your situation but please remember "Being a manager can be fun and fulfilling".

Seeing a peer grow into seniourship or be instrumental fixing a problem in a team is the reward. Yes being a manager costs but there are fantastic moments when it's clear that it was worth it.

Re: The truth about being a manager

#60
post #18

Looks like either you are missing the whole point of being a manager or you are selling it for sympathy. Either way it is not all that bad as you paint it. Otherwise why would lot of people dream of being promoted to a manager? You need to have the taste to enjoy your role. Managers have the power. They are "inside" people for the company while everyone below that level are just workers. Managers are in the loop for…

> They can put people in roles, reward those you like, punish those you don't like. Who don't enjoy that? Those of us without Machiavellian tendencies?

Not sure what you mean by that, but a manager is allowed to select, fine-tune, re-organize, reward and train their team in order to deliver on expectations. They are accountable for the results.

Think of a football team manager. They can't avoid knocking off players from the team as needed. They can't brood about being Machiavellian or something. That's not their job.

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