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The Quiet Ones

nytimes.com

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Re: The Quiet Ones

#281

Post by krzyk »

Fargren wrote: post #30

I think this being loud is particularly ingrained on the US culture. I have to say, tourists from the US are notably loud on Argentina. We have a large amount of tourists on Buenos Aires, but it's always the US accent you can hear all the way across a crowded train wagon or room. I can't imagine why that is.

You probably never have encountered Italians :) When you hear loud voices in the bus here in Poland then you may be sure that they belong to them. English speaking (British and American accents) are second.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#282

Post by paulsutter »

__david__ wrote: post #203
VexXtreme wrote: post #154

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am the same way. I always find it perplexing how most people can't spend literally 10 minutes in complete silence with their own thoughts without getting anxious. I notice this mostly with the younger generation these days (young women especially). They literally feel the compulsion to always have some sort external stimuli coming in, usually in the form of a constant stream of music from their phones/MP3 players.…

I can only speak for myself but I like to listen to music because when I don't my mind starts blaring its own music at me from within. On repeat. All day . It can actually get really distracting (I'll start singing instead of programming) and I have to start up some music to distract that part of my brain and let the rest of it work on whatever I'm supposed to be doing. I find that certain music (psytrance and goa, t…

I had the same problem for most of my life, I was unable to stop listening to music in my head.

The solution was surprisingly simple. When I wanted to stop the internal music, I focused on ambient noise. The leaves rustling in the trees. Passing cars: their tires on the pavement, brakes, engine, the exhaust note. There are quite a few things to notice. While focusing, the music stopped.

At first it took great deliberate effort to quiet the music in my head. But eventually it just went away, within a matter of weeks. I no longer need to exert effort, I have conscious control over whether I want to replay a song in my head, or just have silence.

My meditation teacher Gil Fronsdal thought of it. He's a genius.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#283

Post by paufernandez »

shanelja wrote: post #226
pg wrote: post #81

My life has been a search for quiet for as long as I can remember. I think the fundamental problem with noisy people is not that they're inconsiderate, but that they don't have any train of thought to interrupt, and they thus don't realize the havoc they're wreaking. When I was living in Providence, working on On Lisp , I told my loud but well-meaning neighbors that I was writing a hard computer book, and that made t…

My trick is to use http://rainymood.com - the background noise of a storm is surprisingly peaceful.

I cannot even tolerate rain... I need noise: http://simplynoise.com/

Re: The Quiet Ones

#284

Post by rodelrod »

bambax wrote: post #233
cletus wrote: post #13

I sympathize with whoever criticized the guy for loud typing. Seriously, it's distracting/disruptive. I learnt to type on (manual) typewriter too but laptops and keys don't need to be stabbed with the force of a thousand suns to register the press. It can be just as loud as people talking and (IMHO) can be harder to tune out. After all, we're used to hearing people talk all the time. Oh and while I'm in the mood for…

> In Germany, I don't recall having a lot of problems with noise Here in France all train cars are "quiet cars" and most people respect that. Sometimes you come across somebody who insists on talking on their cellphone while seated (you're supposed to make your calls on the "platform" which is the space between cars), but it's rare and usually doesn't last.

True. French/Swiss trains are my absolute favourite place for work. On the other hand, they make the worst audience for rock concerts.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#285

Post by mgkimsal »

kellishaver wrote: post #202
mgkimsal wrote: post #89

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"I'm good on the quiet car (though I have had my moments I'll admit). There are people of all ages,miracles, and genders who behave this way..." You probably don't encounter the same people all the time. There's enough people out in the world such that each one can "have their moments" when they're around you, and nowhere else, and you wouldn't know the difference. I do sympathize with you though. I've got a sound se…

Do you get much flak from others for your sensitivity to noise? Some noises bother me a lot. Anything that's repetitive will annoy me to the point that I basically cannot function and get extremely angry, and it only takes a minute or two to get to that level. Sometimes sounds (and not necessarily loud ones) are physically uncomfortable. I have similar issues with some textures (in food, clothing, etc.) and am very s…

as a kid I did - it was worst with family - caused a lot of bad feelings. as an adult, i can basically just walk away or leave the room, or try to compensate by controlling the conversation or doing something else to distract myself for a few moments.

I think the term is hyperacusis, but that now seems to general. I'd found a more specific term for this condition I think I have, but haven't been able to find any doctors or therapists willing to deal with it.

in my case I'm not sure I get physical discomfort - it's more mental, or at least, that's how I register it.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#286

Post by mgkimsal »

SiVal wrote: post #272
thaumaturgy wrote: post #97

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I keep late hours in part because, once everyone else goes to bed -- not just housemates but my entire town -- everything becomes still and quiet, and in that stillness I'm finally able to think more deeply, more clearly, about anything. You've probably already had your fill of argument for the day, but I think that assuming that noisy people don't have a train of thought to interrupt is a little bit uncharitable. (I…

I'm with pg here on the endless search for silence as well as your use of late nights to find it. I have sound-blocking ear muffs scattered all over the house and in two backpacks for when I'm studying on campus at Stanford, because at Stanford "quiet study area" seems to be an oxymoron. Studying, like everything at Stanford, is a social event. One disturbing phenomenon I've discovered: When I use these ear muffs to…

noticed this 110% percent - I started wearing earplugs pumping whitenoise a few years back to help sleep - I need these things all the time now - I have whitenoise running probably 18 hours per day now (except when I'm driving).

Re: The Quiet Ones

#287

Post by keenerd »

joezydeco wrote: post #71
cletus wrote: post #13

I sympathize with whoever criticized the guy for loud typing. Seriously, it's distracting/disruptive. I learnt to type on (manual) typewriter too but laptops and keys don't need to be stabbed with the force of a thousand suns to register the press. It can be just as loud as people talking and (IMHO) can be harder to tune out. After all, we're used to hearing people talk all the time. Oh and while I'm in the mood for…

I'd like to know how loudly you need to type to exceed the ambient noise on an Amtrak car, of all places.

In my search for quiet, I often carry a decibel meter around. Amtrak cars, even the quiet cars, have a constant 90 decibel background noise when in motion (measured with a C weighting). It seems like a lot of the train noise is in the low frequencies and the A weighting OSHA uses is the only thing keeping Amtrak out of violation.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#288

Post by rdl »

thaumaturgy wrote: post #97
pg wrote: post #81

My life has been a search for quiet for as long as I can remember. I think the fundamental problem with noisy people is not that they're inconsiderate, but that they don't have any train of thought to interrupt, and they thus don't realize the havoc they're wreaking. When I was living in Providence, working on On Lisp , I told my loud but well-meaning neighbors that I was writing a hard computer book, and that made t…

I keep late hours in part because, once everyone else goes to bed -- not just housemates but my entire town -- everything becomes still and quiet, and in that stillness I'm finally able to think more deeply, more clearly, about anything. You've probably already had your fill of argument for the day, but I think that assuming that noisy people don't have a train of thought to interrupt is a little bit uncharitable. (I…

For the same reason, I wake up early (0200-0300 or so) because most tech people are likely to work late, so waking up early and doing stuff from 0400-1000 or so is functionally the same as staying up late.

Re: The Quiet Ones

#289

Post by corporalagumbo »

pg wrote: post #81

My life has been a search for quiet for as long as I can remember. I think the fundamental problem with noisy people is not that they're inconsiderate, but that they don't have any train of thought to interrupt, and they thus don't realize the havoc they're wreaking. When I was living in Providence, working on On Lisp , I told my loud but well-meaning neighbors that I was writing a hard computer book, and that made t…

Ordinary people can understand

And so is the fundamental problem with quiet people that they're hyper-sensitive, judgemental assholes?

Re: The Quiet Ones

#290

Post by koide »

Cthulhu_ wrote: post #279
koide wrote: post #270

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In fact, true silence is so rare, it is perceived as noise.

In fact, true silence will make you insane. See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sensory_deprivation Can't find the article right now, but they once put people in a completely soundproof room; their minds started to make up sounds and increased their hearing sensitivity to the point where they could hear their own muscles move. I believe the longest one lasted 45 minutes.

True silence for long periods of time makes you insane. For a minute or two it's awesome how you start hearing "the sound of silence".
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