Earlier quoted context omitted.
All they need to do is add a new "message" to say "y'know that message number 4029375 in the cache, yeah that ones deleted, ignore it". This is not hard.
This arrogance is baffling. What makes you think you know enough about Facebook's infrastructure to make such a claim?
Just send a new message, exactly as you would post an original item/comment/etc, but have some special text/field in there that says "please ignore the previous message". The UI would then hide the previous message.
eg
COMMENT: {id:9374758, from:"mibbitier", data:"I hate you all!"}
COMMENT: {id:9374759, from:"mibbitier", data:"*IGNORE_MESSAGE_IN_UI* 9374758"}
Nothing whatsoever to do with infrastructure. Nothing to do with caches. Purely to do with the UI. Not rocket science.Granted, it's a poor way to do it, but it's better than nothing, and easier than trying to invalidate caches etc