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I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

theguardian.com

11–20 of 59 posts

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#11
post #5

While I am not a fan of the current LLM's and I consider myself an independent thinker I would also not be interested in someone shallow enough to care about it that much. She's probably never had a long term relationship and I do not envy anyone that ends up with her.

I think everybody uses clues as warning sign. I can safely say that heavy vocal[1] chatGPT users tend to be of the very boring type from my own statistics. Emphasis on heavy AND vocal.

[1] by that I mean those that keep saying everyone around them they ask chatGPT or you should ask chatGPT for whatever is the subject of the conversation.

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#12
I often miss certain things that people consider important due to the humanity behind it, so this may be one of those cases (although things like art and I definitely do see that for) - but this feels like throwing the baby out with the bath water to me.

If I went on a few dates with someone and was really having a great time, but they told me that all their planning and conversation pieces were from a gen AI platform, I absolutely wouldn't like that. If they used it to audit some code to check for any performance considerations though? Those are so different, at least to me.

This quote:

> A good friend recently told me that she spent a night with a man, and in the morning suggested they get breakfast together. He took out his phone, opened ChatGPT, and asked for restaurant suggestions. Why get close to someone who outsources decisions, including the fun ones like picking where to eat?

Is one I find fair. There is some humanity to choosing some place to eat with another human. It also doesn't feel crazy to me to outsource the gathering and ranking to ChatGPT, though.

Then a lot of the article banks on "societal harm":

> OK, so ChatGPT helps you write your grocery list. Does your individual convenience outweigh the societal harm it can cause?

With some of the things that the article points out to, like water and power usage, I can also see the argument there. But then you can point to so many other things with similar arguments. A classic being "you're using an iPhone right now, don't you know how those are made".

This quote also feels along these lines to me:

> Pereira thinks that using ChatGPT “shows such a laziness”.

>

>“It’s like you can’t think for yourself, and you have to rely on an app for that,” she said.

But we all use Google and a million other services that "remove thinking". This just feels like an additional step (depending on the case, as mentioned above).

I have no idea where to stand on any of this. There's so much to consider and I feel like I can only find one side or the other online to read about. No one with a middle ground that makes sense (that I've stumbled upon).

That said, I do think there's a huge difference between having it draft your love letters for you and having it tell you how to best treat a cut you got on your finger.

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#14

> He took out his phone, opened ChatGPT, and asked for restaurant suggestions. Why get close to someone who outsources decisions, including the fun ones like picking where to eat? If someone is so lazy they’ll hit up ChatGPT to plan a first date, imagine how little effort they’ll spend six months in. Do they have a similar reaction to searching "restaurants near here" in a maps app? Practically any time I go out to e…

i mean it sounds like he started asking chatgpt before even asking the other person what they'd like...

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#15
post #3

"A good friend recently told me that she spent a night with a man, and in the morning suggested they get breakfast together. He took out his phone, opened ChatGPT, and asked for restaurant suggestions. Why get close to someone who outsources decisions, including the fun ones like picking where to eat?" Same logic applies to using Google, I guess? Or any mapping app? How about Yelp?

I think it shows someone who is incapable of using Yelp or Google :P

I am familiar with both of those, and I sometimes ask ChatGPT because I am curious what it will come up with. I am curious to see if it comes up with something surprising or unexpected.

Perhaps the man in question is a thoughtful and curious person who was utilizing all of the resources available to him to provide a great experience to someone he cared about.

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#16
> Over the past few months, as warnings of an impending AI-induced doomsday have dominated my news feed and party conversations, I’ve come up with a new one. I will not date someone who uses ChatGPT.

It's fairly telling that the people who hold these strong opinions think of themselves as strong independent thinkers but are slavishly devoted to the opinions of an algorithm.

I think there are a lot of decent reasons to be skeptical of AI. But this doesn't read like someone who is thoughtfully cautious and has concerns over actual issues with LLMs - this reads like someone in the 50s reading about microwaves and committing to never own one.

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#17
post #7

This feels so much like 90s Wikipedia criticism. There are lousy and lazy ways to use LLMs. There are also enlightening and powerful ways. Find someone curious who will explore them. Don't date people who habitually fight anything new.

"Habitually fighting anything new" is nonpolitical conservatism. It's not my stance but it's a pretty valid one, long recognized. There is social value in having people and groups who reject all changes regardless of their apparent merit or sophistication. You can't trick or swindle them, they can't be fooled or persuaded. It provides a counter to the incentives pushing us to change too fast, or without understanding enough of the possible consequences of broad social/technological changes.

I think a lot of the problems we have now is an unbalance on this, an insufficiently strong conservative force. "Conservative" political movements stopped filling this role a couple generations ago in favor of a sort of radical revanchism. They want to change everything too, just in a different way.

People who fight every change will always lose. But they are still valuable to us.

Re: I refuse to date someone who uses ChatGPT

#20

> He took out his phone, opened ChatGPT, and asked for restaurant suggestions. Why get close to someone who outsources decisions, including the fun ones like picking where to eat? If someone is so lazy they’ll hit up ChatGPT to plan a first date, imagine how little effort they’ll spend six months in. Do they have a similar reaction to searching "restaurants near here" in a maps app? Practically any time I go out to e…

When someone asks ChatGPT for restaurant suggestions, it should reply “Do I look like Google Maps to you?” or perhaps “Can I Yelp you with something?”
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