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Basic Social Skills Guide

improveyoursocialskills.com

11–20 of 283 posts

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#11

I wonder why this was written as these very small paragraphs with only a few lines of content? Apart from the hosting issues due to hackernews it leads to a lot of intros and 'in the next section we will learn...' but the actually useful content is quite little and you have to dig hard for it. I'd personally favor a normal article.

[deleted]

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#12

I've worked with lots of folks on the spectrum and to be honest it's more fun dealing with them as team members rather than "normies". One guy particularly stands out, he joined the team and started off on a solo run with a couple of projects a few others were involved in. A few weeks later I asked him if he'd setup any meetings with the team to get context and, you know, say hello and his response was "why should I…

> I asked him if he'd setup any meetings with the team to get context and, you know, say hello and his response was "why should I do that, can't they read my PRs?". Classic.

That would have been my reply, too.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#13

I've worked with lots of folks on the spectrum and to be honest it's more fun dealing with them as team members rather than "normies". One guy particularly stands out, he joined the team and started off on a solo run with a couple of projects a few others were involved in. A few weeks later I asked him if he'd setup any meetings with the team to get context and, you know, say hello and his response was "why should I…

that surely might be a... diversion from boring work, but fun? fun is something else

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#14
I hope they cover managing your own emotions: staying calm, responding with empathy, and breaking avoidance patterns.

In my last few relationships, I've been having to do relationship coaching with partners because their parents failed to teach them responding with physical or emotional violence is not how you maintain friendships or relationships.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#15
post #5

On the topic of "support your friends", if there's a funeral for someone you weren't super close with but your friend knew well and you're not sure whether to go, I would recommend just going, sitting up the back, offering your condolences if the opportunity comes up, and leaving. I've failed to do this twice. Nobody else said or did anything, but I regretted it.

It's also ok not to attend funerals at all, even if you were close. I broke down every funeral I went to and would rather avoid that in the future.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#16

I wonder why this was written as these very small paragraphs with only a few lines of content? Apart from the hosting issues due to hackernews it leads to a lot of intros and 'in the next section we will learn...' but the actually useful content is quite little and you have to dig hard for it. I'd personally favor a normal article.

Most likely, it's for tracking reasons. To figure out what sections people hit more and less...

I agree with you though. It's sad that content is being reformulated for those reasons.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#17

Hm, that’s all a bit shallow, isn’t it? Can anyone recommend a more thorough source?

Life. It's a live and learn type thing. Social has everything to do with the social club you're in. Every club has different rules.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#19
post #17

Hm, that’s all a bit shallow, isn’t it? Can anyone recommend a more thorough source?

Life. It's a live and learn type thing. Social has everything to do with the social club you're in. Every club has different rules.

Yet these rules aren’t so radically different that there aren’t any common patterns. For instance, noticing people’s birthday and adding them to your calendar so that you can congratulate them is a small, yet very powerful tip that works in pretty much everyday social circle.

Re: Basic Social Skills Guide

#20
I've found that no mater what country I've been to, or what social classes the people belong to, three topics have a 95% success rate when it comes to social relations with guys: sports, cars, fishing/hunting. And to some degree handywork.

It is a bit unfortunate, as I'm not at all interested in talking about those things - but they are such staple topics, that you can come off as a sort of outcast if you can't keep a short convo on those things.

Another observation has been that some topics are very polarized. In some countries you can talk pretty freely about politics, while in other places it is a faux pas.

But then again, part of finding out what the other party likes talking about is a skill in itself.

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