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The death of partying in the USA

derekthompson.org

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Re: The death of partying in the USA

#381

Post by qualeed »

jamiek88 wrote: post #377
qualeed wrote: post #361

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The older one, yes. The younger one, no. So I do the cringe method of writing my information down. But I didn't realize that it was "risky as fuck" and making my kids "stand out" so much to have my contact information on some paper to give to their closer friends. I must be way more socially inept than I thought. (I guess my eldest must be too, because she thinks handing a card to a friend is convenient.) So please,…

> contact information on some paper Is not the same as handing your dad’s business card around to your friends (and is a borderline disingenuous way of summing it up, business cards have business implications i.e., formal implications it’s kinda in the name of them, kids aren’t business people aren’t used to using them socially like you might and don’t see it as a scrap of paper) if you can’t see that then yes I agre…

>Is not the same as handing your dad’s business card

It's my general contact information on business card stock.

Maybe it's a regional thing, but when I read the comment, I just assumed they meant "business cards" in the general sense. Like how there are "joke business cards" that say "yes I'm tall, the weather is fine", etc.

Mine are business card size, on business card paper, made on a business card generation website. It simply says my name, my number, and my email.

>The tone of your reply intimates anger at my responses

Yes, I think it is wild to say that it is "cringe" and "risky as fuck". The dude just wants his kids to play with some friends. It seems to be working for everyone involved.

I feel way more stupid litigating this over comments on the internet mid-day during the week than I would handing out business cards with my full business information on it, to be honest. Parents get so much flak on the internet for normal ass things, it's crazy. Say a little off-hand comment about how you're trying to get your kids to have a good social life and people come out of the woodworks to call you cringe.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#382

Post by Auracle »

mock-possum wrote: post #303
parpfish wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Im convinced that car seat rules have played a big role in shaping child socialization. When was a kid, you were done with your car seat by elementary school so one parent could offer to carpool a minivan full of kids to/from an event. But now that some kids need their car seat into middle school carpools are gone and every kid needs their parent to pick them up. It requires way more planning and parental involvement

Whoa what?? I had no idea about this.

While well intentioned, car seat laws have gotten a bit insane. Minnesota recently implemented some pretty nonsensical ones that are dependent on if they've outgrown their seat.

How are cops supposed to know if they outgrew their seat? It also means that when they move to forward facing or a booster seat depends on the car seat you bought, not their height, (only their) age, or weight.

For older kids, here's the new rule: "A child at least 9 years old or has outgrown their booster seat AND the child can pass the "5 step test" may be restrained by a regular seatbelt, but they must be in a the back seat if possible under 13."

That's not too bad because they at least have a set age, but you still can't expect a parent to have a set of 4 booster seats ready to go to haul your kids friend's around.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#383

Post by bluGill »

typewithrhythm wrote: post #242
bluGill wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

At 18% interest which happened in the 70s your yearly payments would have been 14468.02 or 36% of your income. A couple years ago you could get 3% rates and so your payment on that house would be 40473.98 or 40% of your income, not much difference (and likely the house is larger). At todays 6% interest the payment is 57556.85 or 57% of your income and so not affordable, but this is a very recent thing.

This is both ignoring inflation, and the potential to shorten the duration of the loan.

Inflation is a factor in a few years but never today. Now inithe 1970s high inflation meant that a house you can barely afford becomes a small part of the budget in a couple years while the small inflation of today means a house you can barely afford today is still a big part of the budget in 5 years - but that is not a consideration of today.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#384

Post by fuzzy2 »

torginus wrote: post #354
Aurornis wrote: post #252

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's really sad to me how we have completely fucked a lot of youth with social media, smart phones, You have to be careful with Gen Z threads like this on Reddit and Twitter. They are inherently biased toward Gen Z people who are chronically online and deep into social media. If you spend time with kids in the real world, you learn very rapidly that most of them aren't on platforms like Reddit and Twitter. Of those…

I'm not quite sure if smartphones are still all that popular. With the rise of WFH, (and for Gen-Z, having a Covid lockdown college experience), most people are on actual computers and are sitting at home.

Actual computers? People don't have those any more. Not even laptops. They have smartphones and they may have tablets.

I'm over-generalizing of course, but that's the vibe I get. It's because many, both older and younger, entirely skipped the whole personal computing thing.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#385

Post by vjvjvjvjghv »

technotony wrote: post #185
vjvjvjvjghv wrote: post #156

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One important data point is that houses have become much more expensive compared to income in the last decades. When I lived in CA, my plumber neighbor told me he bought his house in the 70s for 80000 on a salary of 40000. Today he would probably pay 800000 for the same house but make maybe 100000 or a little more. It's definitely harder to buy a house these days.

Interest rates have fallen dramatically over this period, which increases the ratio that is affordable.

High interest with low price has the advantage that you can decide to pay more into the principal, reduce the interest you are paying and so reduce the total amount you are paying. You can’t do that with high price and low interest.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#386

Post by jamiek88 »

qualeed wrote: post #381
jamiek88 wrote: post #377

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> contact information on some paper Is not the same as handing your dad’s business card around to your friends (and is a borderline disingenuous way of summing it up, business cards have business implications i.e., formal implications it’s kinda in the name of them, kids aren’t business people aren’t used to using them socially like you might and don’t see it as a scrap of paper) if you can’t see that then yes I agre…

> Is not the same as handing your dad’s business card It's my general contact information on business card stock. Maybe it's a regional thing, but when I read the comment, I just assumed they meant "business cards" in the general sense. Like how there are "joke business cards" that say "yes I'm tall, the weather is fine", etc. Mine are business card size, on business card paper, made on a business card generation web…

Social risk is real. You have derailed this by applying it to your different situation but have taken on the emotional offense.

Giving your work business card to your kids is different than writing your number down. Again. For the fourth time.

Do you get it now?

It is social risky whether you like it or not and getting angry and offended on other grown adults behalf, again making it about you when it wasn’t when you don’t even do that.

Also it doesn’t work. He was literally complaining that it doesn’t work. We aren’t talking about you.

And he literally states there is a class list of numbers all parents have anyway! So there we go, does your mom have my number, yes she has all the numbers on the list, well give her my business card because I like to be the nail that gets hammered down.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#387

Post by hexyl_C_gut »

Auracle wrote: post #341
Aurornis wrote: post #252

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's really sad to me how we have completely fucked a lot of youth with social media, smart phones, You have to be careful with Gen Z threads like this on Reddit and Twitter. They are inherently biased toward Gen Z people who are chronically online and deep into social media. If you spend time with kids in the real world, you learn very rapidly that most of them aren't on platforms like Reddit and Twitter. Of those…

That's true. However, I worked as a photographer for about 10 years (quit about 2 years ago) and high school senior photos were one of my specialties, so I got to know a lot of teenagers. Overscheduling is, I think, the biggest issue. Most of the teens I worked with had something going on almost every night, to the point where rescheduling due to rain or heat was an absolute nightmare. Sports were the biggest offende…

Demands of sports was identified as a major factor harming the ability to raise kids in Family Unfriendly by Timothy Carney.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#388

Post by 1shooner »

germinalphrase wrote: post #364
Auracle wrote: post #341

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's true. However, I worked as a photographer for about 10 years (quit about 2 years ago) and high school senior photos were one of my specialties, so I got to know a lot of teenagers. Overscheduling is, I think, the biggest issue. Most of the teens I worked with had something going on almost every night, to the point where rescheduling due to rain or heat was an absolute nightmare. Sports were the biggest offende…

I was a HS teacher for about a decade. The demands on kids and families around youth sports (especially private/club leagues) is out of control. I had students, 14/15-years-old, going to their school team practice then club team practice, not getting home until past 9 pm every night. Families from three states away would enroll their kids in my school half of the year to play on the hockey team (staying with local sp…

>The demands on kids and families

I'd like to understand this more. Families like this that I know talk about it as though it's as unavoidable as their mortgage, but functionally isn't this entirely self-imposed? Is it a lack of vision for an alternative? Are whole families succumbing to peer pressure? I don't relate to it.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#389

Post by vjvjvjvjghv »

parineum wrote: post #339
vjvjvjvjghv wrote: post #156

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One important data point is that houses have become much more expensive compared to income in the last decades. When I lived in CA, my plumber neighbor told me he bought his house in the 70s for 80000 on a salary of 40000. Today he would probably pay 800000 for the same house but make maybe 100000 or a little more. It's definitely harder to buy a house these days.

A good, experienced plumber would make a lot more than that in CA.

These are the numbers my neighbor gave me. No idea how accurate they are. I think it’s well known that the average house price to income ratio has gone up a lot in the last decades.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#390

Post by esafak »

amgutier wrote: post #47
Apreche wrote: post #28

This article isn’t wrong, but it neglects to mention real estate, transportation, and lodging. A party needs a venue, and it needs guests. And the guests need a way to get to and from the venue. If they stay a long time, they need a place to sleep. People these days don’t own real estate. Wealthy people own it all. Normal people are renting apartments or portions of homes. It’s kind of hard to throw a big party witho…

In my younger days I threw 100 person parties in a San Francisco apartment - it's standing room only for sure, but so is going to a crowded bar. And I've cooked for 15 without a dining table - you eat on the floor wherever you can find space. Now I don't disagree with your point; I'm not 22 anymore and live in the burbs and have a less full social calendar, largely due to the logistical overhead of finding my way int…

That's the spirit!
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