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If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

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Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#71

Post by aaviator42 »

dinetrimr wrote: post #50

I used to recognize this at my last job, pay was good but left searching for other opportunities where I felt valued in a team. Two years later and I've about burned through all my savings looking for any job at all. Seems like current market has decided my skills and connections are not enough. Fixing to just uber or something next month out of desperation. I used to make six figures. Turns out I decided to quit at…

I'm sorry to hear that, and hope you're able to figure out something sustainable soon.

To other readers: don't quit your job until you have a new source of income locked in!

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#72

Post by fc417fc802 »

apercu wrote: post #70
zwnow wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Guess I fit the stupid and lazy category, interesting thoughts though. I act like I work half of the day and the other half I procrastinate and work simultaneously. Part of it may be ADHD but somehow it works out for me... Still getting my work done.

That kind of work avoidance sounds like a lot of work. Advice would be to try to find a job or role doing something you’re interested it. A lot of the subject matter of my work is not that interesting to me, and the politics and lack of any sort of vision or leadership at most organizations these days makes project work sometimes stressful. But (maybe as a survival mechanism?) I’ve found that focusing on improving ho…

> work avoidance sounds mentally draining.

Procrastination isn't an active thing, it just happens. If that doesn't make sense to you that probably means you don't have that particular issue.

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#74

Post by bloop0 »

Ah yes, the eternal quest for "feeling valued" at work — as if we're all in a corporate therapy session instead of just here to solve problems, get paid, and go home. American companies love inventing emotional debt as a substitute for job security. Maybe next time I get laid off, they’ll throw in a heartfelt Slack emoji to ease the blow.

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#75

Post by zwnow »

apercu wrote: post #70
zwnow wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Guess I fit the stupid and lazy category, interesting thoughts though. I act like I work half of the day and the other half I procrastinate and work simultaneously. Part of it may be ADHD but somehow it works out for me... Still getting my work done.

That kind of work avoidance sounds like a lot of work. Advice would be to try to find a job or role doing something you’re interested it. A lot of the subject matter of my work is not that interesting to me, and the politics and lack of any sort of vision or leadership at most organizations these days makes project work sometimes stressful. But (maybe as a survival mechanism?) I’ve found that focusing on improving ho…

Nah actual work is mentally draining. While I avoid work I do private projects that are actually interesting to me. I work, just not on company stuff that I don't care about.

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#77

Post by dinetrimr »

aaviator42 wrote: post #71
dinetrimr wrote: post #50

I used to recognize this at my last job, pay was good but left searching for other opportunities where I felt valued in a team. Two years later and I've about burned through all my savings looking for any job at all. Seems like current market has decided my skills and connections are not enough. Fixing to just uber or something next month out of desperation. I used to make six figures. Turns out I decided to quit at…

I'm sorry to hear that, and hope you're able to figure out something sustainable soon. To other readers: don't quit your job until you have a new source of income locked in!

Thought I had one, turned in my notice but they rescinded offer a week later for no obvious reason and went hiring freeze. Was about the exact point when the market started inclining couple of years ago. Still think if I had interviewed a month before I would have got the position Been jobless ever since.

I blame my self for it, for not having the insight. Consequences were severe

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#78

Post by im3w1l »

mboto wrote: post #62

What is also useful to keep in mind is the tendency to recreate your primary family life in the workplace. So if you had critical controlling parents who never valued you and everything you ever did was worthless, then you'll tend to select for those places and it is often done outside of awareness. Was your primary family spent being valued and appreciated? Then you'll select for that and when people start to not va…

This is interesting. I could imagine that it's not exactly that you are selecting for the same dysfunction. Maybe it's rather that you don't know what functional looks like, and therefore can't as easily find a place that fits or steer your current place in the right dirrection?

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#79

Post by steveBK123 »

austin-cheney wrote: post #66

This is far more simple than it sounds. Do what others cannot to deliver success to the internal goals of the business. It is always more about capabilities and delivery and it’s never really about hard work. These capabilities can include authoring new tools but most often are soft skills and better written communication. Many people will fail at this because they cannot perform or independently determine their own…

Yes, its never actually about actual effort. Rewards are handed out based on outcomes, interpersonal skills and PERCEIVED effort.

Re: If you are useful, it doesn't mean you are valued

#80

Post by theoreticalmal »

zwnow wrote: post #75
apercu wrote: post #70

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That kind of work avoidance sounds like a lot of work. Advice would be to try to find a job or role doing something you’re interested it. A lot of the subject matter of my work is not that interesting to me, and the politics and lack of any sort of vision or leadership at most organizations these days makes project work sometimes stressful. But (maybe as a survival mechanism?) I’ve found that focusing on improving ho…

Nah actual work is mentally draining. While I avoid work I do private projects that are actually interesting to me. I work, just not on company stuff that I don't care about.

What personal projects are you working on these days? Or do you have multiple?
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