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I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

wave3.social

661–670 of 728 posts

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#661

This idea appears every once in awhile, as it’s obviously a major issue in modern life. The interesting thing though is how the solution is always location-agnostic. By that I mean it’s never really about a specific cafe or restaurant or soccer field, it’s always an app or service that organizes people to show up in various places. I bring this up because if you look at places that had lively social activities a few…

It’s not always location-agnostic, but you’re more likely to hear about location-agnostic efforts because they have further reach. For instance Men’s Sheds are a local effort with a thousand locations in the UK: > Men’s Sheds encourage people to come together to make, repair and repurpose, supporting projects in their local communities. Improving wellbeing, reducing loneliness and combatting social isolation. > Resea…

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Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#663

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's because the genders aren't valued equally by society, so they don't permute. Once gender equality is established they could switched and the statements would be equivalent.

I dunno, generationally we may be correcting a problem that will soon no longer exist, or even invert. Women are attending and graduating college in higher numbers than men in GenZ. Much of the man-o-sphere GenZ rightward turn seems to be resentment at society being sure what the use of men is anymore. That is, from a very young age girls are told they can do/be whatever they want. Often now, boys are described in te…

> I do think we do need to solve the male part of the equation after spending the last 50 years raising women up.

When left-wing progressives talk about dismantling...let's just call it the "p-word", dismantling the expectations about what a man should and shouldn't be is very much part of that.

The system victimizes men as much as women, and we should be tearing that system down, not leaning back into it in a misguided attempt of trying to rebalance the scales.

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#665

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What pressure led to declining membership? Did it have anything to do with "Boy Scouts is a sexist organization" narratives?

Uh, no, I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but the primary reason was because the boy scouts have rampant sex abuse scandals like the catholic priesthood. Also Tiktok means fewer young boys so bored that they set things on fire.

Ah yes

Opening up the organization to young girls as well seems like exactly the right fix for

Rampant sex abuse scandals

That's how I would fix that problem too

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#666

I think a lot of this boils down to the fact that most men are too insecure to engage with each other meaningfully. This causes them to appear overly competitive, or uninterested. How many times have you spoken to another man that can't stop trying to one-up you, or cannot be bothered to ask you a single question? That's the majority of my interactions with other men.

>How many times have you spoken to another man that can't stop trying to one-up you, or cannot be bothered to ask you a single question? That's the majority of my interactions with other men.

Very true. Statistically men don't care about other men, period. Conversely they care about women or their daughters more than their sons. A lot of it is biological - meaning mean are the dispensable gender. The term 'women and children' is not a coincidence.

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#667

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You've really never had an attractive member of the opposite sex show up and the girls/guys get all competitive? I'm wondering how that's possible, it happened multiple times a week - a day even - to me in high school and college. I guess always being in mixed groups meant it was always subtly in play. 5 dudes chilling is a different dynamic than 3 guys 2 girls. People who keep insisting it's about some weird need fo…

Maybe this happened when I was 19. I haven't observed this sort of thing happening in decades.

Note I mentioned high school and college as the time of these interactions.

That being said it just comes more subtle as people get older or alternatively remove themselves from the dating pool.

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#668

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because the response they are receiving when they 'advocate for the better of their demographic (and the type of response that is turning them sour/disillusioned) is: "Let's say everything you said was true" - iteria (needlessly implying it's a lie/not happening) "someone is providing an easy scapegoat for their own problems" - tayo42 (implying what they are experience/feeling isn't real/valid. This takes some tempor…

I can have a lot of empathy for someone who had explicit promises broken but apart from this sounding like a completely made up story it has no bearing on his skin color or sex. People are taken advantage of all the time and promises, even contracts are broken all the time. Your 'son' has taken the route of victimization rather than taking the high road. Getting screwed over is one thing, turning that in to bigotry i…

Believe all men.

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#669
post #332

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Don't disagree, but some hard things don't get said when the other gender is around, especially with men of a certain age. It takes a lot for many men to even out loud say the word "lonely" or "sad" or "worthless". A lot of male conversation is silent. The whole spiel is to project and feel capable of dealing with the world, to feel useful, to be a Man. To feel otherwise is not "masculine". To admit this to mixed com…

>A lot of male conversation is silent. No it isn't! Men need to talk about their feelings just as much as women! There isn't some major difference in how we handle emotions! We are all human, and humans are emotional creatures. So many men need to Grow the Fuck Up and realize that being vulnerable is not the same as being weak. You need to be talking to your friends or confidants about your feelings. >To feel otherwi…

> Men need to talk about their feelings just as much as women! There isn't some major difference in how we handle emotions!

I... I've never heard this before, and it is in stark contrast to decades of my personal experience.

> You need to be talking to your friends or confidants about your feelings.

What do you mean "need to"?

Re: I'm starting a social club to solve the male loneliness epidemic

#670

This idea appears every once in awhile, as it’s obviously a major issue in modern life. The interesting thing though is how the solution is always location-agnostic. By that I mean it’s never really about a specific cafe or restaurant or soccer field, it’s always an app or service that organizes people to show up in various places. I bring this up because if you look at places that had lively social activities a few…

Last time I was in Prague my friend brought me straight to the local pub, and without even ordering beer came out. Everyone knew each other and each other's dogs (Prague is very dog friendly, in fact one of the dogs was in the kitchen begging scraps). I have vague memories of similar scenes growing up in Australia, and have seen similar in Ireland. I don't know if anywhere like it in US cities, but maybe it's still like that out in the country.
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