Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Things I do to be consistently happy

joel.is

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

101–110 of 117 posts

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#101

Post by itmag »

dkarl wrote: post #56
nostromo wrote: post #17

I have a theory. I think that self-help books and articles actually make people miserable. I'm quite happy, and I manage to be happy without having a list of the 6 essential things I must do every day to stay happy. In my personal life, the people most into self-help books and the like are the least happy. Correlation doesn't prove causation, so I can't blame the books and blogs -- but they certainly don't seem to be…

Have you ever helped someone figure out how to do something with their computer by just asking them questions? "What program did you use to do this last time? Good, start that program. What do you mean what do I.... [sigh] Okay, where do you go to start programs? Great. Yes, go there." They know everything but sometimes they seem incapable of putting it together. Life's like that for some people. You make a pot of co…

There are many ways to characterize or explain why people who can describe a clear path to a better life have trouble following it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Akrasia

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#102

Post by ajuc »

SoftwareMaven wrote: post #90
chii wrote: post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It sucks to be a night owl in an early bird world. this is actually quite interesting - you'd think that humans who are less functional during the day time may be at an evolutionary disadvantage during pre-historic times. However, a lot of animals actually tend to be active at night, and so in theory, easier to catch prey at night!

From what I understand from the limited reading I've done, it is more like "night guard" versus "morning guard". Somebody needed to be up at night when the ("insert night feeding predator of choice") came to town. My guess is that it wasn't until after we built a world of walls that most people could sleep comfortably at night.

I've read somewhere that the natural sleep regime for human is to sleep for a few hours after the night come, wake up and be active for 1-2 hours around midnight, and then go back to sleep and only weak up in the morning.

There: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Segmented_sleep

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#103

Post by OmIsMyShield »

I would love a view into the self-talk /automatic thoughts that (self-professed consistently) happy people have.

What goes through your mind when you are stressed or anxious? What is the immediate, automatic, unblockable thought(s) that come up?

What is the first visceral response when you have setback?

What is the script that plays when you are exhausted?

I think the author's habits are admirable, but also think that they might be symptoms (rather than the cause) of a another form of health - a mind that is filled with patterns of thought that lead to happiness, and I would enjoy seeing into those minds a whole lot. Anyone?

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#104

Post by ssfak »

eric_cc wrote: post #40
ams6110 wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't know anything about the author, but sounds to me like he's a person who's not in a relationship and almost certainly doesn't have young children. Many of the things in his routine would be nearly impossible to do for a person who's in a "family"

I disagree with you. He basically recommends a sleeping pattern, having fun, exercising, learning, helping others, finding ways to win. Which of these is impossible for people in a family? If many of these 6 things...lets say 4 of them... are nearly impossible for people in families then you'd think people in families would all be quite unhealthy.

Well, he recommends to stick to a specific schedule (having a walk at 21:30, going to sleep at 22:00, waking up at 06:00, etc) The exact times do not really matter, but sticking to a specific time schedule is problematic IMHO when you have a family because of the non-determinism introduced (especially by the kids).. Unless everyone in your family agrees to follow (and stick to) a similar schedule..

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#106

Post by ebiester »

adriand wrote: post #50

I find it somewhat interesting how often people profess that their key to happiness essentially boils down to living the sort of "good life" that in many ways is the Christian ideal, regardless of whether or not they are personally religious. Although there are habits and rituals that can lead to a more positive outlook, such as exercising regularly, there are deeper aspects to this way of life. This includes helping…

First, this kind of lifestyle in no way guarantees happiness: http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/preview.aspx?... - I'd argue that, despite any faults she had (and I think it's wrong to cover those up), she would be an example of this lifestyle, yet she with through many periods that would not be considered "happy." -- It just turns out that many others for whom this prescription doesn't work often drift away from the protestant prescription.

I would further argue that this derives from the Enlightenment -- see the Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin. Learn new things is not embedded in the Protestant lifestyle but rather was bolted on because of the tension between it and the enlightenment. The Protestants adapted to what I would consider a local maxima.

That said, I'd argue that Shawn Achor's accumulation of research would be a better path to happiness for most of us. Meditation, gratefulness, regular exercise, keeping a strong social community, and performing conscious acts of kindness doesn't necessarily tie to the protestant work ethic but it seems to work pretty well.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#107

Post by SonicSoul »

i don't know about having to do all these things every day, but getting closer to your goals, feeling spiritually and physically healthy, and helping others WILL make you happier. regardless of the source that lead you to do it (self help, religion, up-bringing,..). i'd also add meditation to the list.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#109

Post by adriand »

blvr wrote: post #79
adriand wrote: post #72

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Why is this unexpected? From my nonreligious standpoint, I see Christianity (and indeed, most religions) as a device created specifically for this reason -- to allow people to be content with themselves. I'd like to clarify that I see a difference between the so-called Christian "way of life" and the Christian "way of thinking". The activities and behaviours (e.g. hard work, fair dealing, etc.) of the Christian way…

>>> I'd like to clarify that I see a difference between the so-called Christian "way of life" and the Christian "way of thinking". The activities and behaviours (e.g. hard work, fair dealing, etc.) of the Christian way of life may lead to happiness, but the thoughts and mindset of the Christian way of thinking may not (e.g. guilt over over normal sexual desires). >>> In fact, I think that many religions, and this esp…

> Just curious what your exposure to Christianity is? Reason being is that I've gone from a secular background to belonging to a very devout church and in my experience Christians are much happier.

My experience is exactly the same as yours, except in the reverse order. ;)

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#110

Post by MattSayar »

exch wrote: post #5

At the risk of going completely off topic and being all philosophical: Can someone explain to me what 'being happy' means? I have consistently failed to answer anyone who asked me if I was happy or not. All I can say is that I am content or not. Which, for me, means that I am satisfied with the situation I am in. I can do what I want to do, when I want to do it and do not have to be bothered by things that do not int…

Happiness is when your cheeks hurt from smiling too much. Happiness is riding a jet ski. Happiness is enjoying a beer with your friends. Happiness is accomplishing something difficult. Happiness is looking forward to whatever you're doing today.

To me, that's happiness.

Post reply on HN