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Things I do to be consistently happy

joel.is

81–90 of 117 posts

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#81

Why is being in love not mentioned? Or sex? Are you just happier being alone?

Honestly, good luck to him but it's just self-help "look at me I live an ascetic life of discipline" blah blah. In my mind, it is a little hard to take. "Here's my algorithm: by waking up early, I have two spare hours at lunch to help 2 people, at a rate of 1 per hour then I go to bed and early promptly but not before my nightly stroll about town." Follow this routine strictly for 20 years and let me know how that works for you.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#83

Surely happiness is relative? I'm sure that many people who we think of as having shitty lives often feel "happy". If you're "consistently happy", then doesn't that just become the norm? To me, happiness is the peaks from the "norm" - if I was consistently happy, then I'd have to re-define what happy meant to me.

> To me, happiness is the peaks from the "norm"

What you consider the "norm" doesn't have to be the real norm of your own life. What you consider the peak doesn't actually have to be actual peak, either. It's partly your ability to perceive it so.

People who suffer depression don't necessarily have more shitty life than others. The similar question can be asked: "why would they feel sad, doesn't sadness becomes the 'norm' for them?".

> To me, happiness is ...

If you are happy with your definition of happiness, then it's cool. But if you are not happy that you don't satisfy "your own" definition of happiness, then you should consider re-define it. Happiness exists to make you happy, not to make you suffer.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#84
This article resonates with me on so many levels. When I started working on Semantics3 early this year, I spent many a day frustrated that I was barely achieving 50% of the productivity that I was capable of and I felt quite miserable about it. Here are a few things I did to get things back on track:

1) Moved Closer to Work: Daily long journeys are massive downers. When I awake in the morning, I often feel the urge to hit my laptop right away and channel all the early morning enthusiasm towards work. College years were ideal on this front because there was never anywhere to be (I wasn't too inclined towards attending classes ;)). Anyway, now, I live 20 mins away from work.

2) Stopped Listening to Music (especially during the few hours after I awake): I'm a music buff and perennially have music in my ears. But I find that music often blocks useful thoughts; letting the mind wander leads me down interesting channels, be it more ideas for my startup or even bugs in my code that I discover by merely thinking about the previous day's work (Rob Pike's "Best Programming Advice" comes to mind). Few things are more satisfying than stumbling on these nuggets! These days, I restrict music to certain times of day, such as my ride home or during certain phases during the work day.

3) Found Time at Work Alone: I like getting to work a couple of hours before everyone else, before any distractions kick in. For some of you, staying at work an hour after everyone leaves, lunchtime, or even spending an hour at home to finish things up might do the trick. Those power-charged hours make me feel like I've given that extra bit to my day. On a related note, check out PGs "Maker's Schedule, Manager's Schedule" (www.paulgraham.com/makersschedule.html)

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#85
post #61
post #50

I find it somewhat interesting how often people profess that their key to happiness essentially boils down to living the sort of "good life" that in many ways is the Christian ideal, regardless of whether or not they are personally religious. Although there are habits and rituals that can lead to a more positive outlook, such as exercising regularly, there are deeper aspects to this way of life. This includes helping…

There has been research done on happiness as a subject of science. The How of Happiness is a nice book for a popular audience on the subject.

I just finished The Geography of Bliss, another wonderful book combining the science of happiness along with a fun travel story of a miserable reporter trying to find it.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#87
post #79
post #72

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Why is this unexpected? From my nonreligious standpoint, I see Christianity (and indeed, most religions) as a device created specifically for this reason -- to allow people to be content with themselves. I'd like to clarify that I see a difference between the so-called Christian "way of life" and the Christian "way of thinking". The activities and behaviours (e.g. hard work, fair dealing, etc.) of the Christian way…

>>> I'd like to clarify that I see a difference between the so-called Christian "way of life" and the Christian "way of thinking". The activities and behaviours (e.g. hard work, fair dealing, etc.) of the Christian way of life may lead to happiness, but the thoughts and mindset of the Christian way of thinking may not (e.g. guilt over over normal sexual desires). >>> In fact, I think that many religions, and this esp…

> in my experience Christians are much happier

Maybe because when they do something wrong, they believe an imaginary being will forgive and still love them; or if they encounter difficulty, they can beg this imaginary being to help and think they're doing something meaningful.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#88
post #79

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>>> I'd like to clarify that I see a difference between the so-called Christian "way of life" and the Christian "way of thinking". The activities and behaviours (e.g. hard work, fair dealing, etc.) of the Christian way of life may lead to happiness, but the thoughts and mindset of the Christian way of thinking may not (e.g. guilt over over normal sexual desires). >>> In fact, I think that many religions, and this esp…

> in my experience Christians are much happier Maybe because when they do something wrong, they believe an imaginary being will forgive and still love them; or if they encounter difficulty, they can beg this imaginary being to help and think they're doing something meaningful.

> believe an imaginary being

Needlessly condescending. I am sure the parent is well aware of the "imaginary being" criticism of his belief.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#89
post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> in my experience Christians are much happier Maybe because when they do something wrong, they believe an imaginary being will forgive and still love them; or if they encounter difficulty, they can beg this imaginary being to help and think they're doing something meaningful.

> believe an imaginary being Needlessly condescending. I am sure the parent is well aware of the "imaginary being" criticism of his belief.

I felt the parent and grandparents were being condescending. I have no regrets.

Re: Things I do to be consistently happy

#90
post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I wish it was that easy. The reality is that there are early birds and night owls (see, e.g., http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/01/080126-sleep... ). There is no question in my mind that I am a night owl. My "nap time" is around 4-5pm, which, if I succumb to, will keep me awake until 2-3pm. I am also completely useless before 10am, regardless of whether I get up at 5am or 9:55am. It sucks to be a night owl…

> It sucks to be a night owl in an early bird world. this is actually quite interesting - you'd think that humans who are less functional during the day time may be at an evolutionary disadvantage during pre-historic times. However, a lot of animals actually tend to be active at night, and so in theory, easier to catch prey at night!

From what I understand from the limited reading I've done, it is more like "night guard" versus "morning guard". Somebody needed to be up at night when the ("insert night feeding predator of choice") came to town.

My guess is that it wasn't until after we built a world of walls that most people could sleep comfortably at night.

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