It's a rough position for a country to be in, that's for sure. I have to believe we can talk our way out of it, cause I don't want a civil war
It's exactly the sort of thing George Washington warned about in his farewell address.
Your belief has a flaw. As an analogy:
Two children argue over how to share a cookie. One child argues that the cookie should be split in half. The other child says that he should get the entire cookie.
The adult, believing that each child is not as unfair as the other claims, gives 75% to the second child, and 25% to the first child.