My wife and I adopted two severely abused and neglected children and held out until they were 14. But the thing that we quickly realized is that our children's online life was only as secure as their friends most permissive parent. It still boggles my mind how many elementary-aged children had unfettered access to the internet. I suspect a lot of them unwittingly traumatized themselves.
Wait Until 8th
181–190 of 351 posts
Re: Wait Until 8th
#182Smartwatch without apps but with limited phone, texting, and location sharing to trusted contacts appears to be the way out offering most technical benefits without becoming a firehose of horribleness, addiction, and distraction.
Dumb / kosher phones seem like another idea but have the disadvantage of being another thing to loose and break rather than something that's strapped to them.
Another thing is to role-model and reinforce smartphone etiquette by not pulling them out to waste time when around other people.
I applaud keeping smartphone, social media, screen, and computer privileges minimum age as high and restricted as possible for as long as possible.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#183> Let’s protect the elementary and middle school years from the distractions and the dangers of a smartphone. > … because of unrealistic social pressure and expectations to have one. Sorry, but I do not agree with the equivalence of a device and one of its possible usages. My kids got their first smartphone at the ages of 5-6. (dramatic pause) When I was younger me and my siblings got a camera, a Game Boy, a watch, a…
You should start a business selling those locked down phones to parents because 99% of them have never heard of Lineage OS. Half who have heard of it wouldn't know how to begin installing it and locking it down.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#184We have a house phone, which is normally in the unihertz "student mode" which prevents installing apps and only allowing use of some apps. When our kids ask for their own phone, the answer is always an easy no. I have no problem with computers. But the internet is not your friend. Endless content is hard for me, a developed adult to resist at times. If they want to stay up late, their forced to sneak a book into thei…
> Endless content is hard for me, a developed adult to resist at times. Remind me of food Would you give your kid endless access to chips and sweets?
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Re: Wait Until 8th
#185Re: Wait Until 8th
#186I'm still surprised the "dumb phone for kids" and "dumb watch with basic comms" markets are so underdeveloped (from my perspective). I would love my kids to have (a) gps tracking, (b) ability to send texts/calls to like 5 predefined numbers, (c) tell the time, and nothing else. But watches all seem to have games or weird gamified fitness trackers (Google's new fitbit for kids). Or they are super kid-ish, like bright…
But you don't need any of this? The parental lock out settings on Android and iOS are superb - you can buy any modern smartphone, and lock out everything you want so it acts like a dumbphone with a nice screen - i.e. disable the web browser, disable app installs etc.
I see this comment a lot and it seems to mostly highlight that people aren't investigating the very capable tools which already exist.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#187Earlier quoted context omitted.
Ha, maybe the labels were more useful when day-to-day technology wasn't progressing as quickly as it is now! Your internet story is also funny to me because my dad worked at an ISP when I was a toddler. One of my earliest computer memories is when he taught me how to go into the Windows 98 graphics menu and toggle the color settings from 16-bit to 32-bit (or vice versa, can't remember now) before booting up a particu…
Yeah, I think trying to make games work on Windows 3.1 to 9x was a very formative experience for just a narrow slice of Millenials. I've seen the definition of Millenials span all the way up to 2000 births, and I'm pretty sure the games "just worked" for a kid born in 2000. To be fair, I've wondered if people in previous generations feel the same way. Like was the coming-of-age experience of an older Boomer, who was…
My guess is the culture was a lot different between 1960 and 1980 (obviously, right) but the general workings of society weren't too far apart for the average person. You got in your car to go home and watch TV...
Also, I have a younger sibling born just after 2000 and games "just working" sounds about right. Not to mention that console gaming was really picking up around then.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#188I'm still surprised the "dumb phone for kids" and "dumb watch with basic comms" markets are so underdeveloped (from my perspective). I would love my kids to have (a) gps tracking, (b) ability to send texts/calls to like 5 predefined numbers, (c) tell the time, and nothing else. But watches all seem to have games or weird gamified fitness trackers (Google's new fitbit for kids). Or they are super kid-ish, like bright…
I think the problem is it's not a defensible business because there's little barrier to entry to create an Android watch with less features. Every carrier has their own dumb, minimal smart watches, but I'm sure most of them suck because the product management is probably outsourced.
Essential features and nonfunctional requirements:
- Calendar, time and date, alarms and reminders
- IP67
- Ruby or gorilla glass screen (scratches OK)
- Locked-down phone, texting, messaging, and location sharing
- Ability to call 911
- Minimal apps
- Minimal animation
- Band that's somewhat difficult to undo and hypoallergenic material... silicone seems pretty neutral
- Not disassemblable without tools because the kids I know would have them in pieces in minutes.
- Neither a fashion statement nor a kid group social faux pas
If any existing models fulfill these close enough, then great. If not, then it might be worth entertaining but would need a go-to-market strategy to compete with every other smartwatch mfgr on the market with unlimited funding.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#189I find it fascinating, that hacker news, the literal community for people tinkering with stuff seems to be full of people who want to gut their kids instead of teaching them how to use stuff responsibly. Probably tons of people here know how to code since they've learned on their own. Reality is that the kid will be a loser / outsider due to no phone. Also kids have a lot of time that could be used to learn stuff. An…
> Reality is that the kid will be a loser / outsider due to no phone
I grew up in the 90's and my parents were strict, particularly compared to a lot of my peers. Things like watching television was heavily restricted. I remember making similar arguments to my parent's deaf ears "I won't fit in, all the kids at school will be talking about what they watched on TV last night, I'll be a loser" etc.
My experience was that most of the kids didn't care that I couldn't understand their Simpson's references or whatever. If anything they were sympathetic, I would get a lot of "man your parents really suck" and then kids would shrug and move on.
I did resent my parents growing up. Looking back I think they were pretty clear examples of "tiger parent" stereotype. I felt immense pressure and stress to achieve good grades and it honestly felt like nothing I did was enough to make my parents happy. I get along with my parents now as an adult but as a teen my home life felt very unhappy at times. I can remember the relief I felt when I left home to live on my own.
So I think it is more likely your child will resent you, then them being ostracized by their peers.
Re: Wait Until 8th
#190Earlier quoted context omitted.
IMO it's not the phone itself that matters, it's what the kids do on it. Phone can be good to communicate with parents, bad for nearly anything else at a young age.
Why is texting friends bad? My daughter has autism, and struggles to connect with her classmates. She gets overwhelmed in groups, and is shy talking in person sometimes. Now that her classmates started messaging each other, she is actually being included a lot more. She has started messaging and setting up online play dates with her classmates. I was so proud when I found her playing Minecraft with a class mate while…
I don't know why, but your message moved me. Thanks for sharing! I'm happy for your daughter and wish her many friends, as many as she wants.