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Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

bbc.com

11–20 of 23 posts

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#11
post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

[flagged]

Probably anyone that goes to such lengths to have kids intends to raise them well. The kid will have above average odds of being raised by people that will love him/her.

>“We were very unlucky, we lost our son. But the court has given us a very precious gift. We would now be able to get our son back,” the mother, Harbir Kaur, told the BBC.

This sentence suggests otherwise, unless it is a mistranslation.

They are NOT getting their son back. They are getting a different person. And I'm not sure this is what the son wanted; It probably is not.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#12
This sounds like a convoluted way for the parents to continue their family's patrilineality, given the parents are no longer of a suitable age to conceive another son:

> The couple say they approached the court because they wanted to carry on his "legacy" and that the order would help them preserve a connection with him and help their family name to continue.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#13
post #11
post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Probably anyone that goes to such lengths to have kids intends to raise them well. The kid will have above average odds of being raised by people that will love him/her.

>“We were very unlucky, we lost our son. But the court has given us a very precious gift. We would now be able to get our son back,” the mother, Harbir Kaur, told the BBC. This sentence suggests otherwise, unless it is a mistranslation. They are NOT getting their son back. They are getting a different person. And I'm not sure this is what the son wanted; It probably is not.

as a parent, i know exactly what they mean. maybe when i was single i would have understood their words differently. sometimes we ought to lend others a charitable interpretation of their words.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#14
post #2

If the son is not around to raise the child it's a bad and selfish idea.

Is it really worse than anyone going to a sperm bank and conceiving with a stranger's sperm?

> and that he had not left any written or oral consent for the use of his frozen sperm

Presumably he intended to save it to have the option later to use it if that's what he decided to do. That's very different than consenting to allow a donatee to use it.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#15
post #2

If the son is not around to raise the child it's a bad and selfish idea.

Is it really worse than anyone going to a sperm bank and conceiving with a stranger's sperm?

To me yes, it just feels kind of morbid. “This is the grandkid we made from our dead son…” vs “this is my son, we conceived him using surrogacy after we lost our other son tragically”.

I’ll admit that there could be a cultural component that is in play that may change the perception where they live.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#17
post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>“We were very unlucky, we lost our son. But the court has given us a very precious gift. We would now be able to get our son back,” the mother, Harbir Kaur, told the BBC. This sentence suggests otherwise, unless it is a mistranslation. They are NOT getting their son back. They are getting a different person. And I'm not sure this is what the son wanted; It probably is not.

as a parent, i know exactly what they mean. maybe when i was single i would have understood their words differently. sometimes we ought to lend others a charitable interpretation of their words.

As a human being those words are creepy. As a parent, they are extra creepy.

Re: Our son died. Now we can use his sperm to have a grandchild

#20

If I read this correctly, they'll fertilise their daughter with frozen sperm from her deceased brother? That's like, post-mortem incest. The risk of cancer will be higher.

No, it says "their two daughters have given an undertaking in court that they will take full responsibility for the child.."

and

"She added that the family was considering using his sperm in surrogacy and that a relative had agreed to be the surrogate. “We will keep it in the family,” she said. Under Indian law commercial surrogacy is illegal."

So it seems the daughters agree to take responsibility, but there will be a surrogate.

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