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How 30 days without social media changed my life

stevecorona.com

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Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#91

Post by beambot »

graue wrote: post #62
Swizec wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't understand this at all. FB (and social media in general) is the only thing I've found that enables me to organize going out for drinks with more than 2 people at once. Also the only thing that lets me post "Hey, anyone wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow evening?" and actually having 5 people come. Three of which are completely new outside twitter/facebook. It's really quite awesome. Hell, I have very scatter…

When I signed up for Facebook, that was my dream. That I would post stuff like "who wants to get ice cream tomorrow night?" and, just like that, people would take me up on it. Never happened. On the contrary, people I met would "friend" me, but still keep me out of their real-world cliques. Example: A guy invited everyone to a party at his house. Everyone else who responded knew where he lived. I sent a message askin…

Honest question about the party: Why didn't you directly contact some of the "everyone" people who responded to ask for the address (or carpool)?

I find PG's "Relentlessly Resourceful" essay equally-useful in a social context. It took me a long time to realize that (for me) social interactions were an active and often taxing process. (And emails / FB messages are pretty much the most passive form of communication anymore.)

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#92

Post by funkeemonk »

Swizec wrote: post #44
physcab wrote: post #20

I stopped using Facebook last November. It's been a fantastic experience. Whether you realize it or not, FB changes your emotional health. FB used to make me oddly depressed. Its like sitting in front of the TV and feasting on Sour Patch Kids for two hours. I would sit there staring at how awesome people's lives were and wonder why I wasn't doing such awesome things myself. I heard about the passing of family members…

I don't understand this at all. FB (and social media in general) is the only thing I've found that enables me to organize going out for drinks with more than 2 people at once. Also the only thing that lets me post "Hey, anyone wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow evening?" and actually having 5 people come. Three of which are completely new outside twitter/facebook. It's really quite awesome. Hell, I have very scatter…

WhatsApp FTW? Most of the impromptu meets for food and drinks with friends are organized using that instead of Facebook. Takes way too long to wait for people to check FB, RSVP, etc.

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#93

Post by JEVLON »

Swizec wrote: post #44
physcab wrote: post #20

I stopped using Facebook last November. It's been a fantastic experience. Whether you realize it or not, FB changes your emotional health. FB used to make me oddly depressed. Its like sitting in front of the TV and feasting on Sour Patch Kids for two hours. I would sit there staring at how awesome people's lives were and wonder why I wasn't doing such awesome things myself. I heard about the passing of family members…

I don't understand this at all. FB (and social media in general) is the only thing I've found that enables me to organize going out for drinks with more than 2 people at once. Also the only thing that lets me post "Hey, anyone wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow evening?" and actually having 5 people come. Three of which are completely new outside twitter/facebook. It's really quite awesome. Hell, I have very scatter…

Exactly. You don't have to read any posts. Facebook will email you when someone has invited you to a party, or give you a push notification when someone wants to be friends. You can use Facebook's integration with your phone's address book to get all their contact details, so you can always reach them. You can have all the benefits of Facebook without visiting the actual website or app.

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#94

Post by nathan_long »

Karunamon wrote: post #71
khyryk wrote: post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It can still be a more-true-than-false generalization. Most of what we can claim is limited to generalizing.

It's that generalization i take issue with. The communication medium you use to talk with your friends doesn't have all that much correlation between how close of friends you are. Distance, time, and other concerns would rank much more highly than facebook vs something else.

I would say that real friendship requires intimate conversation - discussing things that you wouldn't share with just anyone. This is what separates friends from acquaintances.

Intimate conversation, by definition, must be (or at least feel) private. So if you communicate with someone face to face, by phone, or by email, you may maintain the feeling of privacy necessary for real conversation. I'd allow that "private" Facebook messages might serve the same purpose.

Wall posts, however, could not. Everything is said with half a mind to how everyone else will read it.

That's only part conversation; the other part is performance.

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#95

Post by raverbashing »

JEVLON wrote: post #93
Swizec wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't understand this at all. FB (and social media in general) is the only thing I've found that enables me to organize going out for drinks with more than 2 people at once. Also the only thing that lets me post "Hey, anyone wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow evening?" and actually having 5 people come. Three of which are completely new outside twitter/facebook. It's really quite awesome. Hell, I have very scatter…

Exactly. You don't have to read any posts. Facebook will email you when someone has invited you to a party, or give you a push notification when someone wants to be friends. You can use Facebook's integration with your phone's address book to get all their contact details, so you can always reach them. You can have all the benefits of Facebook without visiting the actual website or app.

Seconding this

One thing about facebook most people don't notice is it is highly customizable

Want everything by email? Doable. Want to not use the site and have most of the important things go by email (where "important things" is set by you)? Doable

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#96

Post by raverbashing »

Swizec wrote: post #44
physcab wrote: post #20

I stopped using Facebook last November. It's been a fantastic experience. Whether you realize it or not, FB changes your emotional health. FB used to make me oddly depressed. Its like sitting in front of the TV and feasting on Sour Patch Kids for two hours. I would sit there staring at how awesome people's lives were and wonder why I wasn't doing such awesome things myself. I heard about the passing of family members…

I don't understand this at all. FB (and social media in general) is the only thing I've found that enables me to organize going out for drinks with more than 2 people at once. Also the only thing that lets me post "Hey, anyone wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow evening?" and actually having 5 people come. Three of which are completely new outside twitter/facebook. It's really quite awesome. Hell, I have very scatter…

I agree wholeheartedly

And exactly, if you don't know how to socialize, fb won't help you with that! (in the same way MS Excel can't really help you if you don't know math)

And of course, as in the real world, there's vanity, being ignored by people, etc

But I think fb (and twitter) often provide a very good service. Just for a start, fb chat 'killed' MSN messenger

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#98

Post by gurkendoktor »

wmboy wrote: post #66
adrianhoward wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not attempting to dissuade anybody from dumping Facebook - but to present another option. I use FB once a day. I treat it like a newspaper. A once-a-day update on friends lives that I poke at over a coffee, then throw away until the next day. I find this a nice balance between having a "real" life, and maintaining some connections with folk that I otherwise wouldn't see socially very often. Works for me. YMMV.

Yeah, I'm thinking of deleting the FB app on my phone. It's just a temptation to constantly check what's happening and stop being present with whoever I'm around.

Do it! I've never looked back.

Then, ask yourself if $amount of money per month is still worth it for a 3G contract. This one really depends on your work and your environment (is there WiFi in walking range if you need it?). But it saved me time and money so far.

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#99

Post by cynthiaherald »

Facebook, like most other social media platforms, are tools. You can use tools to benefit or enhance your life or you can use it to destroy or negatively affect your life. Money is a tool, for example.

Other than that though, this was a great article and I'd be interested to start a similar experiment. I do think you if you are more purposeful with social media, you can still be as productive and do cool things like the writer did.

Re: How 30 days without social media changed my life

#100

Post by stevencorona »

pixie_ wrote: post #50

It's funny how he couldn't do any of these things before while using social media. This is BS. I knew even before clicking the link exactly what it would say. Incredibly cliche. Someone should write an article - Moderation. How does it work?

ouch. so much negativity.
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