A VC-funded startup called WhosHere is trying to steal my social network

The short answer is this: It's possible, but hard to pull off.

First, you would have to do some basic research on court filing procedures. It's not rocket science, but you can't just pop an envelope in the mail addressed to the judge.

Once you figure out how to file documents for the case, you need to determine what type of documents to file. E.g. a motion to dismiss might be appropriate if you think the claim is utterly bogus.

It can be "plain English," as Smattiso suggested, and indeed, judges always appreciate clarity. Legalese isn't required, but valid legal reasoning is. Contrary to popular belief, "legal reasoning" doesn't have to be arcane. It's pretty much just a matter of using everyday logic to apply legal principles to the facts of the case.

It's a lot like learning to program. There's no magic involved. It's just a matter of reading the relevant documentation, looking at examples, and using your innate reasoning abilities to put something together in accordance with the rules. And yet, as with programming, reasoning and writing about the law take practice to do well. You can hack together a simple CRUD app with zero programming experience and a lot of motivation. But you wouldn't want to bet your entire net worth on it. Likewise for legal writing. You can spend a few evenings of hard work learning the anatomy of a motion to dismiss and the basics of trademark law, and then you can write your motion. But I wouldn't do it if my personal finances were on the line.

In a situation such as the OP describes, there is an additional challenge. According to the OP, the plaintiff is using and perhaps abusing quirks of court procedure to his advantage. (I'm referring to the bit about default judgement and the alleged absence of certain documents.) That, too, could in principal be dealt with by a non-lawyer, but it would be quite difficult. You'd have to learn a great deal about the finer points of court procedure. This is especially difficult because it's not uniform across jurisdictions.

EDIT: You would also need to determine whether this would constitute unlicensed practice of law in your jurisdiction. Generally, you're allowed to represent yourself in court ("pro se.") But the rules about representing your business are a little more complicated. Sometimes it's OK, sometimes it's not.

So, yes, you can sometimes write something up and get a case dismissed without hiring a lawyer, provided you're willing to learn a great deal very quickly. But you'd be taking a tremendous risk. Probably not a good idea.

Just to be clear: I'm not at all recommending that the OP do this. I'm just answering the question posed in the parent comment. The OP really does need a lawyer, especially considering the plaintiff has allegedly shown a willingness to play procedural games.

It concerns me that I'm attacked personally for advocating for common sense when it comes to the law. Being sued? Shut up. Don't post to HN. Don't comment on the case. Don't challenge the other party to Quake 3 on Twitter. Don't give people legal advice after saying "I'm not a lawyer and this isn't legal advice". Stop being stupid.

This advice transcends my allegiance, which is to nobody involved in this discussion (and which doesn't matter at all, frankly), and I'm annoyed that you think I'm stupid enough to involve myself in something I'm personally vested in.

WhosHere exist by about 5 years!

I wish your comment was the only one, frankly, and we could really use a "you are not a lawyer, stop pretending to be one" guideline.

Edit: I've made a "Ask PG" to ask for just that: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=4055661

In this case, there are legal repercussions and serious consequences to doing most of things on this page. This is stuff to talk about with a lawyer, not the fucking Internet, and the person I replied to is already giving frighteningly bad advice.

You know how in criminal proceedings, they say "anything you say can and will be used against you?" It's the exact same for civil actions like this, which is why Public Relations 101 (which should be of interest to most in this audience who want to do their own startup) says "being sued or otherwise challenged legally? STFU. No comment."

This isn't about credentials, it's about being smart when it comes to threats that can genuinely hose your business, and not listening to a bunch of armchair lawyers on HN who think they have the best course of action without any sort of context.