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Hunting Down My Son's Killer

matt.might.net

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Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#51

Post by baq »

ericb wrote: post #46
tomjen3 wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

I think what you're missing is the emotion, the meaning, and the beauty of having children. And sure, if you leave all that out by willfully ignoring it, then your point makes sense. One could argue that, by the same token, living is just to protect and create the next generation and rationally has no point.

it kind of doesn't have a point. your only option is to believe it does and convince yourself that you have a reason to exist. yeah, it's a glum perspective - you're either depressed or irrational.

expecting a child in 2 months. i'll see how that will affect my view on the world ^_^

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#52

Post by donohoe »

tomjen3 wrote: post #21
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

  Rationally there is no point in having children at all.
Rationally there is no point doing a startup.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#53

Post by Arjuna »

tomjen3 wrote: post #21
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

"And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents."

"Contrary to recent scholarship and popular belief, parents experience greater levels of happiness and meaning in life than people without children, according to researchers from the University of California, Riverside, the University of British Columbia and Stanford University. Parents also are happier during the day when they are caring for their children than during their other daily activities, the researchers found in a series of studies conducted in the United States and Canada. [...] The findings are among a new wave of research that suggests that parenthood comes with relatively more positives, despite the added responsibilities. [...] The consistency of their findings across all three studies 'provides strong evidence challenging the widely held perception that children are associated with reduced well-being.'" [1]

These findings are from this paper, entitled In Defense of Parenthood: Children Are Associated With More Joy Than Misery [2], to be published in Psychological Science. [3]

From the abstract, "The results indicate that, contrary to previous reports, parents (and especially fathers) report relatively higher levels of happiness, positive emotion, and meaning in life."

[1] http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/news/releases/...

[2] (Note: PDF) http://www.faculty.ucr.edu/~sonja/papers/NKEDLinpress.pdf

[3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_Science_%28journ...

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#54

Post by postfuturist »

It pays to become an expert in your own (or your family members') medical conditions, because you'll quickly become more of an expert than 99% of the doctors you will rely on for care. It helps when they all ask the same dumb questions, which they will do. If your condition is mildly rare, you'll notice when you see a new doctor, that their knowledge will be limited to what you found out in the first hour of internet research on the condition, unless they are a specialist on that particular condition.

I have a slightly rare genetic condition, and I've only met 2 doctors who know more than I do, and that's because they do active research on the exact condition and have authored or co-authored multiple research articles on it.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#55

Post by tomjen3 »

simonh wrote: post #35
tomjen3 wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

So what you're saying is you were a complete waste of time and your parents would have been better off without you? Seriously - I'm not trolling or trying to be abusive. It seems to me that's literally what you're saying. Life isn't rational. Pleasure isn't rational. In the grand scheme of things, no achievements are significant or meaningful. But that's no way to live a life, IMHO. I know I'm far happier with my chi…

Yeah, that is what I am saying -- but then my parents have never been that rational.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#56

Post by mattmight »

waffle_ss wrote: post #38

Thanks so much for the fascinating and emotionally stirring article. I will definitely be passing this on to others I know. The thing I kept thinking during the article is, "Is there something that I, as a programmer, can do to help people like Bertrand?" Is there some way that we programmers could use our talent to augment or advance existing technology in this area? I realize that the science involved here is non-t…

Computational biology is a field with much room to grow.

Finding a mutation is just the start of the journey for someone like Bertrand.

Once you find the mutation, you have to figure out what the mutant gene does versus the normal gene.

Duke had to work with a lab, culturing cells from my son and poking at them to figure this part out.

If we were better at predicting the structure of proteins from the DNA that encodes them, we've taken a big first step toward automating/simulating the "functional work."

Protein folding is a nasty research problem at the intersection of chemistry, biology and computer science.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#57

Post by Dn_Ab »

hirenj wrote: post #43
Dn_Ab wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In what way is experimental analysis of such mutations a bottleneck?

Well, once you pinpoint a potential mutation on a gene - that gives you a starting point into the pathway that could be possibly producing this particular disease. From there, it's sort of like clicking outwards from a wikipedia page, except instead of wiki pages, its related genes. Every one you go to, you read and find out what people know about it. You then start to form a picture in your head as to what the mecha…

What can be done to speed this process up? What parts can be automated? Is the process for every gene unique or can some steps be factored out?

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#58

Post by tomjen3 »

alain94040 wrote: post #33
altrego99 wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, not worth it at all. Years 1-10 - you will loose all your time - cleaning diapers, making the child eat, making it study, teaching it values - waking up at night - and doing a lot of things for it. Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up and you're genetically conditioned to like it. But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code without expecting in…

Ha. Can't wait for your [future] kids to discover your post on HN, 15 years from now, and give you a hard time about it.

Whow, are you arrogant. Can you even contemplate somebody who doesn't want to have children?

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#59

Post by aiscott »

maratd wrote: post #24
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

> Marriage is about compromise. ... > Children, however, afford no such privilege. Well, at least you're 50% there. Don't compromise with your wife, either. Lead your wife and children to a better place. Lead them to a place where all of you are happy and yes, it is possible. It's very easy to "compromise" ... just divide by two, right? Much harder to use your noggin and figure out a position where everybody is genui…

I believe the intended meaning of compromise with regards to marriage is about not always getting "your way."

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#60

Post by Avenger42 »

simonh wrote: post #35
tomjen3 wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

So what you're saying is you were a complete waste of time and your parents would have been better off without you? Seriously - I'm not trolling or trying to be abusive. It seems to me that's literally what you're saying. Life isn't rational. Pleasure isn't rational. In the grand scheme of things, no achievements are significant or meaningful. But that's no way to live a life, IMHO. I know I'm far happier with my chi…

> In the grand scheme of things, no achievements are significant or meaningful

I'd scale that back a bit and say "it's entirely possible none of your achievements (or your children's) will be seen as 'significant or meaningful' to others". But the achievements of people like Norman Borlaug or Alexander Fleming have had a profound impact on the entire world, so when I see "no achievements matter" it gives me pause.

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