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The illusion of being stuck

the-simulation-strategists.beehiiv.com

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Re: The illusion of being stuck

#31

Post by sdwr »

mynameisvlad wrote: post #13
rwasco wrote: post #4

> I impulssively bought a plane ticket to Panama: > I cried. Haven’t done that in years. > I had the uncomfortable conversation with my business partner to tell them I no longer have passion for it and am leaving them the decision to continue or quit. > I forced myself to talk to strangers every single day. These also could be explained by someone entering hypomania. How would you distinguish stuck/unstuck from depre…

These energy levels are all relative, though. If you’ve spent most of your life in a depressed state, then suddenly having energy (possibly because you’re dealing with your mental health for the first time) then a lot of things are going to look like “hypomania” in comparison and I feel like that is the case for a lot of people.

Where it turns into mania, in my experience, is when you start doubling down repeatedly. If your good feeling comes from believing that you are making a huge change in your life, you get anchored to the rate of change, and start needing bigger and bigger feelings to keep up.

It's a kind of self-ponzi scheme - nothing has tangibly gotten better, all you have is the belief.

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#32

Post by rdsubhas »

noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

You seem to have experience in this. Could you recommend or share any alternative approaches?

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#33

Post by dumpsterlid »

card_zero wrote: post #16
noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

Did you know, the brain is hard-wired to be suckered by self-help books? One trick that I personally find very liberating and enlightening is to make a big pile of such material and burn it. It gives me a sense of warmth and inner joy.

[dead]

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#34

Post by ufocia »

noufalibrahim wrote: post #24
haswell wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My perspective on this is one of a person who underwent years of complex trauma in childhood and my stuck-ness was a series of overly sensitive protective mechanisms that had been built up by the experience. “The illusion of being stuck” also sounds a lot like “Learned Helplessness”, which is a maladaptive conditioning of the brain to strongly believe that not doing something is the best option because doing somethin…

That's a very nuanced take. I dont take offense to using "techniques" to fix "problems". I'm more annoyed by the usual phrasing of these things as life changing and revelatory.

> I'm more annoyed by the usual phrasing of these things as life changing and revelatory.

Maybe it's time to unstick yourself from these patterns. Life changing and revelatory can be as much evolutionary as revolutionary. There's no need to narrow them down to their extremes.

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#35

Post by anon373839 »

noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

Honestly, the centerpiece of the article is this:

> In plain, simple terms, you need to: do the uncomfortable thing.

That’s what the advice boils down to, and it works, and it’s not a hack. It’s growth. There are lots of sophisticated techniques to help you actually do “the thing,” but if your best judgment is that the thing is the right course of action, then you ultimately do need to violate your feeling that it is wrong/dangerous/scary and let your feelings catch up later.

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#36

Post by FlyingSnake »

rors wrote: post #21
noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

Over the last few months I've been experimenting with Buddhist meditation, which leans heavily into this metaphor. They phrase the metaphor differently, with a focus on flattening of the grooves in your mind. I've found these ideas helpful, but they're hardly novel. The Buddha lived over 2000 years ago. One big difference the objective. Most of these blogs are about hacking your mind to be more successful, whereas re…

It is also a folly to equate Buddhist traditions with Self help book sellers. Siddhartha Gautam Buddha was just one of the 6 other prevalent Dharmic masters and there enough original material from many of those traditions. The Dharmic traditions arose over centuries through a healthy collaboration of diverse set of people over a vast geography.

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#37

Post by charles_f »

anon373839 wrote: post #35
noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

Honestly, the centerpiece of the article is this: > In plain, simple terms, you need to: do the uncomfortable thing. That’s what the advice boils down to, and it works, and it’s not a hack. It’s growth. There are lots of sophisticated techniques to help you actually do “the thing,” but if your best judgment is that the thing is the right course of action, then you ultimately do need to violate your feeling that it is…

I think that's fair, but there's also value in describing what is being stuck. It's important being able to identify feelings and put words on it. It also helps to see this is something other people go through, so as to feel less alone

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#39

Post by charles_f »

rwasco wrote: post #4

> I impulssively bought a plane ticket to Panama: > I cried. Haven’t done that in years. > I had the uncomfortable conversation with my business partner to tell them I no longer have passion for it and am leaving them the decision to continue or quit. > I forced myself to talk to strangers every single day. These also could be explained by someone entering hypomania. How would you distinguish stuck/unstuck from depre…

I guess you could see it as one of the causes of depression? Kinda like having a cold describes a situation that can be caused by 10s of thousands of viruses, in the end you still feel the same kind of shitty. Still useful to know what kind of virus it is so it can be treated?

Re: The illusion of being stuck

#40

Post by maxverse »

noufalibrahim wrote: post #15

I've come across these kinds of articles before and they always seem to suggest that you rewrite the metaphorical firmware of your brain so that it operates in a way that is advantageous to you. There's some notion of self discovery from first principles. I'm not convinced that this is generally a good idea. It makes a person unmoored and open to anything ("so open minded that your brains fall out"). It's also often…

The difference between medicine in poison is the dose ("the dose makes the poison.") Good ideas taken to extreme are often Very Bad, but sometimes a little bit of the idea is exactly what you need.

If you have social anxiety, talking to people through discomfort, or initially treating interactions as a game can help take the pressure off. Treating people as NPCs is unhealthy. Routine exercise is good. Becoming obsessed with how your body looks, living in the gym, taking steroids is bad. A sense of humility, purpose, and devotion in life is generally good. Religious fanaticism is bad. Confidence, which often involves a touch of self-deception, generally is good. Unchecked arrogance is bad.

If I tell you to go for a run or do some push-ups, there's a risk that you'll become totally obsessed with exercise. But going for that run will also help. You need a moderate amount of my advice, not an extreme amount.

This piece resonated with me. When you're stuck in a routine you dislike, being aware that your brain is optimized to stay in its current state (according to the cited research) is good. Going bananas and being "unmoored and open to anything", living every day without any sense of habit or purpose is bad. The dose makes the poison.

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