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Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

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Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#31

Post by yungporko »

rrgok wrote: post #25
keithwarren wrote: post #5

I have felt a a sort of fog/rut for years now. Figured it was just age. Doc checked my testosterone level and it was super low. About 10% of what you would want. Started taking T via a gel/lotion and after about two weeks I noticed a significant change in my productivity. The rut/fog was gone, I was working like I did 15 years ago. Prescription ran out, was out of town, basically missed 10 days. Fog was back, a week…

I know it is a minor things, any change in your hair loss? I'm asking because because there are studies that links T to DHT to hair loss.

i think it almost certainly will accelerate hair loss if you have MPB, my T has barely risen since starting treatment and even i have noticed the difference in hair loss.

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#33

Post by The_Colonel »

Aeolun wrote: post #24

It’s probably a bad idea, but having a child seems to have made things significantly better in some ways. I’m still prone to anxiety, but existential fears have been greatly reduced. I attribute this mostly to lack of time to think too much, so you can probably find different ways to achieve the same effect. I think somewhere along the way I’ve also become adult enough to realize that there will be days I accomplish…

> but having a child seems to have made things significantly better in some ways

A child answers the existentialist "why I'm here? what's the point?" question on a primal, fundamental level. The child needs you, your purpose is to care for it.

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#34

Post by 5350-uiop-1130 »

for me i feel totally detached from my work, it's just a means to an end, a salary

as such i find it very difficult to care beyond doing the minimum not to get fired

yet the work gets ever more complex and layered with technical bureaucracy and ever changing landscape of idiots to deal with

i am planning to quit by eoy. thats my solution. life is too short to waste it.

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#35

Post by nprateem »

cjbprime wrote: post #4

In-person yoga classes have turned out to be dramatically therapeutic for me, which surprised me because I was already seeing a therapist, and I thought I didn't enjoy exercise at all. (If ClassPass is in your area, they have a free trial that makes it easy to try out many different studios.)

Yep. Being at the back of a yoga class always works for me

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#37

Post by cmrdporcupine »

The_Colonel wrote: post #33
Aeolun wrote: post #24

It’s probably a bad idea, but having a child seems to have made things significantly better in some ways. I’m still prone to anxiety, but existential fears have been greatly reduced. I attribute this mostly to lack of time to think too much, so you can probably find different ways to achieve the same effect. I think somewhere along the way I’ve also become adult enough to realize that there will be days I accomplish…

> but having a child seems to have made things significantly better in some ways A child answers the existentialist "why I'm here? what's the point?" question on a primal, fundamental level. The child needs you, your purpose is to care for it.

This phase lasts until they are teenagers, and the questions come back but stronger.

Unless you enjoy the answer to "why I'm here" being "driving my teen around to hang with their dubious friends", "nagging about homework", and "human paycheque."

Just sayin' :-)

I love my kids, but children are not the answer to getting meaning into your life. Having a mid-life crisis in your late 40s & 50s long after you've had kids is a cliche for a reason.

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#38

Post by ao98 »

The best advice I been given: “when your problems seem overwhelming, get busy solving other people’s problems. Not only will you feel good about helping others and get that feeling of productivity, seeing what others are dealing with will also give you perspective on your own problems and a renewed sense of hope and energy”. Volunteer somewhere. Help a friend out. But try to do it in person where you can get more of that human connection.

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#39

Post by TomaszZielinski »

Aeolun wrote: post #29
TomaszZielinski wrote: post #23

At one point I had a bookshelf full of books on depression, fear, lack of confidence, etc., so it's impossible to answer such a broad question in a comment, but let me comment on the "high potential" sub-question. Personally I no longer think that "high potential" is a real thing--I think of it more as of a mental trap that can play part in depression (it definitely played a big part in mine..). What I mean by that (…

Reflect on what you did wrong, but do not keep beating yourself up over it?

Yes! "Extract" your lessons from the past but with the future in mind.

One big caveat--it's "wrong" only by your today's standards. Back then it was most likely "right" (willful crimes aside), that's why you chose to do it! So I would strike it and leave simply: "reflect on what you did, (...)".

Re: Ask HN: How did you get yourself out of a rut?

#40

Post by subjectsigma »

ao98 wrote: post #38

The best advice I been given: “when your problems seem overwhelming, get busy solving other people’s problems. Not only will you feel good about helping others and get that feeling of productivity, seeing what others are dealing with will also give you perspective on your own problems and a renewed sense of hope and energy”. Volunteer somewhere. Help a friend out. But try to do it in person where you can get more of…

> The best advice I been given: “when your problems seem overwhelming, get busy solving other people’s problems. …”

As someone in the midst of trying this I can tell you personally it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. I think I’m starting to realize that this person is beyond my capability to help and all the time I’ve wasted helping them could have been spent improving my own situation

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