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I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

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Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#51

Post by em-bee »

JohnBooty wrote: post #31
kayodelycaon wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think it’s easy enough to explain. I’m asexual and don’t feel sexual attraction. In fact I’m completely blind to it. I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school. Since then, I am constantly reminded of that by everyone around me. They have something I’m expected to have. Just imagine if you were the weird one because you were the only person with emotions. You can’t escape it. You can’t f…

I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school I hope you have gotten, or will get to, a place where you no longer think of this as something "wrong" with you!

that's very difficult when you have a trait that others can't see, and therefore can't be aware of or understand, and much less empathize with. it feels wrong because you keep getting confronted with expectations that you can't fulfill. and you can't see others that have the same experience. so you end up feeling you are the only one.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#52

Post by cladopa »

I had the experience of dealing with clinically diagnosed pshycopaths. One of them was in my school, a kid that was very smart but too rational, you could feel there was something wrong with him. He did not have real friends so he tried threaten people into becoming his friend or else...

He was not using physical force, but using his mind in order to plan punishing people rationally.

He just could not understand the concept of friendship, as he could not feel it. He believed everybody else was faking it. He was a cynic.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#53

Post by cladopa »

cladopa wrote: post #52

I had the experience of dealing with clinically diagnosed pshycopaths. One of them was in my school, a kid that was very smart but too rational, you could feel there was something wrong with him. He did not have real friends so he tried threaten people into becoming his friend or else... He was not using physical force, but using his mind in order to plan punishing people rationally. He just could not understand the…

PostData: He got diagnosed as a 30 years old or so.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#54

Post by em-bee »

spiffytech wrote: post #29
rapsey wrote: post #27

> After years of study, intensive therapy and earning a Ph.D. in psychology I wonder what the percentage of psychologists get their degrees to figure out what the hell is wrong with them. I bet it is pretty large. Also her gaze in the picture is quite unnerving. I wonder if it is because I know she is a sociopath or would I find it just as unnerving if I did not.

My wife is a therapist and says it's a very common reason people get into the field.

i think this is positive. because it means therapists can empathize when people feel that there is something wrong with them. there is nothing worse than a therapist who doesn't take your feelings seriously.

also, when you do need therapy yourself, depending on what kind of therapist you get, you can end up spending a lot of time learning just for your own sake. my brother did that, and at some point he was able to explain his issues better than the therapists he talked to.

did you ask your wife about her reasons to become a therapist?

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#55

Post by h2odragon »

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #44

I’m really worried that there’s a trend to normalize narcissistic and sociopathic behavior simply because “they are self aware” There are a few ASPD, NPD or narcissist Instagram pages which are clearly sociopaths getting their attention fix by acknowledging and describing these behaviors - this isn’t the same as recovery groups or serious interventions because ASPD has been seen as impossible to treat (though that’s…

So what would you tell a "smart sociopath" to do? Someone who wants to live and pursue their own happiness without diminishing that of others?

Should they just cease to exist? Retreat somewhere they can't hurt others and live apart from society because society has no place for their disability? Or is it possible to fit in and be useful even if you're neuro divergent?

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#56

Post by pkoird »

slibhb wrote: post #46

I think it's more likely that she's lying for attention (and a book deal) than it is that she's actually a sociopath. Since we're talking about subjective feelings, it's not like there's any way to knwo for sure. I suppose if she killed someone and was managing this publicity blitz from jail it would add some credence.

Lying to thousands shamelessly for their own gain? How very... Sociopathic.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#57

Post by n4r9 »

dustincoates wrote: post #6

Another article from the same person: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2024/02/25/magazine/patr... And discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=39500240 And yet another from a few years back: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24806019

She seems to be a bit of an intriguing character. I remember googling her when that thread from 18 days ago popped up and couldn't figure out whether she was genuine or simply a very good self-publicist chasing a literary niche.

Seeing her pop up again has made me lean towards the latter. I googled around again and discovered a reddit thread in "askpsychology": https://www.reddit.com/r/askpsychology/comments/jqewhk/does_...

It raises a few interesting concerns, for example:

* You'd expect someone with a degree in psychology to be unlikely to use the term "sociopath" so freely and without qualification or clarification.

* Her credentials seem questionable. There's no record of her actually having a PhD and no record of a dissertation in proquest. It's possible she did a "PsyD" program at California Graduate Institute.

* She appears to use clinical terminology incorrectly and make claims on her (now disappeared) blog that aren't backed up by research.

* Her real name appears to be Patricia Cagle, however she wrote articles under the name "Patric Gagne" for a column called Modern Love in NYT which apparently does not permit pseudonyms.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#58

Post by nordsieck »

klabb3 wrote: post #33

Super interesting. I can recognize this behavior with people playing multiplayer games. When there are no stakes, and everything is a game, people mess around – especially when they’re bored. If it’s just a game, who cares? People with extremely low “emotional reactivity” appear unlikely to share with others (why would they, most of us share stuff for empathy - and they may not see the point - or lose out socially).…

> The best fit in a healthy society, I think, is doing things that others can’t, like extreme sport type of stuff, or astronaut, brain surgeon

Reminds me of the Bill Burr bit on Lance Armstrong[1]

> The guy was a sociopath on a bicycle. As far as I'm concerned we got off easy. If that guy was working for a corporation he would have been pouring stuff in the water supply, doing god knows what. Just keep him on the bike. Let him go up and down hills. He's not hurting anybody.

---

1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9YL04v-J5U

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#59

Post by slibhb »

pkoird wrote: post #56
slibhb wrote: post #46

I think it's more likely that she's lying for attention (and a book deal) than it is that she's actually a sociopath. Since we're talking about subjective feelings, it's not like there's any way to knwo for sure. I suppose if she killed someone and was managing this publicity blitz from jail it would add some credence.

Lying to thousands shamelessly for their own gain? How very... Sociopathic.

Whether it's sociopathic depends on how she feels about it!

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#60

Post by haswell »

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #44

I’m really worried that there’s a trend to normalize narcissistic and sociopathic behavior simply because “they are self aware” There are a few ASPD, NPD or narcissist Instagram pages which are clearly sociopaths getting their attention fix by acknowledging and describing these behaviors - this isn’t the same as recovery groups or serious interventions because ASPD has been seen as impossible to treat (though that’s…

> This isn’t a disability, sociopathy is a self-propelled toxic character trait, typically resulting from deep childhood trauma that our society rewards structurally

I don’t understand the point you’re trying to make here. If this is a result of deep childhood trauma, in what way is it self propelled?

> Mostly we just need to identify and isolate people with ASPD as quickly as possible.

This seems pretty horrific to me. Assuming ASPD exists on a spectrum, and assuming it’s possible to treat it or at least manage it, it seems like the absolute worst option is to isolate people, the realities of which would almost certainly mean grouping people with these traits together.

Furthermore, if indeed trauma is the cause, it seems even more horrific to categorically discard people who have undergone this kind of hardship through no fault of their own.

I’m not saying people who cause harm to others should get a free pass. But what you’re describing seems untenable from a moral/ethical standpoint, to say nothing of the practical implications.

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